My wife seldom allows me to perform oral sex on her. As she has gotten older, she has become more resistant to it. She claims that she is much more sensitive than she used to be. Also I think she feels that maybe she is harrier than I would like. She doesn't like to shave. I don't expect it, but would admit that I would appreciate her pussy being trimmed a bit. It does seem that I used to get too much hair in my mouth. But still, I don't care about that. I really like performing oral. She does oral on me all the time. Any thoughts on how I might get her to be more open to it?
Oral
- Thread starter Stanmeister
- Start date
No.
Notice how I edited it? You don't believe her when she tells you *why* she doesn't like it. You've been together for some time in assuming based on the fact that you mention how she's more resistant as she ages.
If you don't believe her in the first place, you don't deserve advice on how to get what *you* want from her. Leave her alone about it. That's my advice
Nothing will make her want what she doesn't want. Respect and acceptance will probably do more for her than oral she has no interest in.
Not saying this applies to the OP, this is a broad statement measured by years on this site. Over thousands of similar threads.
I would resent the demand on and of my body. This constant low key pawing when a no has been supplied and an additional, in no way required, explanation has been given.
Some men need to stop. Why seek advice to over ride her agency?
I can't imagine having a partner with such entitlement to my body, and since my wants are being dismissed this about body not sexuality or pleasure. I am exhausted and turned off just by second hand exposure.
If you want to please her, believe her. If you want to give her head? Peach season is coming up. Knock it out of the park.
Not saying this applies to the OP, this is a broad statement measured by years on this site. Over thousands of similar threads.
I would resent the demand on and of my body. This constant low key pawing when a no has been supplied and an additional, in no way required, explanation has been given.
Some men need to stop. Why seek advice to over ride her agency?
I can't imagine having a partner with such entitlement to my body, and since my wants are being dismissed this about body not sexuality or pleasure. I am exhausted and turned off just by second hand exposure.
If you want to please her, believe her. If you want to give her head? Peach season is coming up. Knock it out of the park.
Nope. No idea. I’m not into receiving oral. It’s got nothing to do with the amount of hair I have, or any other self conscious issue. I find it boring. My mind wanders off. If a man insisted on giving me oral, I’d insist that I be able to watch something good on tv. No way to convince me that I’d enjoy it.
I have respected her. And I have pushed nothing on her. She enjoyed it at one point in our lives. I don't feel any sense of entitlement to her body, although I don't mind if she feels some entitlement to mine.
I enjoyed a lot of things when I was younger that I don't care for today. As we grow older we know what we like and what we want. And it's not a gender issue. It is what it is.
You are trying to make her do something she has downright told you she does not want to do. Why would you keep trying?
If it concerned her physical or mental health I could understand getting her to act. But this is a personal preference, and she doesn't care for it.
I have a friend that likes her steak medium well. I eat mine rare. Why would I push my preferences on her and think she would enjoy a rare steak when she told me she doesn't?
You are trying to make her do something she has downright told you she does not want to do. Why would you keep trying?
If it concerned her physical or mental health I could understand getting her to act. But this is a personal preference, and she doesn't care for it.
I have a friend that likes her steak medium well. I eat mine rare. Why would I push my preferences on her and think she would enjoy a rare steak when she told me she doesn't?
I may have been making some assumptions and for that I'm going to apologize, but I don't apologize for calling you out on not believing her reasoning for not wanting it.
Things change, and for different reasons. I think you should believe the woman you love, and who loves you.. Don't assume she's lying. I'm sure you know her better than I do, but I do hate seeing people dismiss their partners reasons for wanting or not wanting something in the bedroom.
Just make it known once in awhile in a kind/humorous/nonpressuring way that you're still willing and able if she changes her mind. Not often. Or at all.. but if you must (because I understand wanting something specific and not having a partner open to the idea) just be as accepting as you need to be if the door never opens.
I have been open to her changes. I am also interested in providing her pleasure. I don't think she is lying. I think sometimes she doesn't believe she should have too much pleasure.
I made it clear the majority of my response was not direct toward the OP.
Never force pleasure upon someone. It's not pleasurable.
Holly Doors
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Talk to her when the moment is right, if she doesn't enjoy it she doesn't enjoy it.
You don't think she's lying, then why did you bring up the hair at all? She says she doesn't like it because she's more sensitive than she used to be. You even used the phrase "she claims" suggesting you do not in fact believe her .
I don't like what I'm smelling.
And... If you were actually open to her changes and accepted them you wouldn't be seeking advice on how to get her to let you do something she's told you she doesn't want anymore.
I stand by my original advice. Leave her alone about it and stop assuming she's lying.
After rereading this original post I've come to a conclusion.. you don't want to do it for her, you want to do it for you and you're being selfish.
Accept her boundaries, believe her reasons, and move on.
Scarletbegonia
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You “want to perform”
You want her to shave so you like performing more.
She has consistently not been into it. Many women are neutral to negative about receiving oral.
Often because he is not as good as he thinks. (She usually is pretty good)
She says the area is too sensitive.
looks to me like she has good reasons. It is unpleasant for her.
You want her to shave so you like performing more.
She has consistently not been into it. Many women are neutral to negative about receiving oral.
Often because he is not as good as he thinks. (She usually is pretty good)
She says the area is too sensitive.
looks to me like she has good reasons. It is unpleasant for her.
You shouldn't be.
Maybe just take some time to think about the replies you got and take them to heart and mind.
My responses weren't meant to insult or belittle you. I'm just being honest and very blunt. I'm not saying or implying that you don't love and care about your wife. I don't know you, or her. I'm just giving my sincere thoughts based on the very little information we've been given.
I know. But sit and read your original post, then your follow up responses and tell me there are no contradictions. I really don't think you can, because you did in fact contradict yourself.
Whatever. You obviously don't know me or know my intentions. Assuming you do is probably not your best work.
