Out of wedlock pregnancy

Mem

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How many of your friends got pregnant or got someone pregnant out of wedlock?

In my mid teens a good friend of mine got his girlfriend pregnant and she had an abortion. Her older siblings made them break up because it happened more than once.

Another friend got his girlfriend pregnant and they got married at around 18...and later divorced.

A female friend got pregnant in her late teens and got quickly married...and later divorced. Her sister had a baby out of wedlock and later married the guy and had another child with him, but they later divorced too.

I guess it's just a sign of the times.
 

Runco

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Do you think this is a modern phenomenon? Think back to tales of shotgun weddings back in the day...
 

goodwood

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Babies have been born out of wedlock since the beginning of time. This is no surprise to anyone. It seems to be instinctual to be married for the sake of the baby and try to make the relationship work. But if a relationship will not work outside of marriage, I fail to see how being married will change that. And in the end, the most important thing and so frequently forgotten (it seems) is the happiness, well being and the best care for the baby. I don't care if a child's parents are married or not as long as they are both committed to reaising a happy, healthy, well adjusted child.
 

transformer_99

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Uggghhhh, this is always a tough one. At a personally vested and interested level from being a fellow member of any society, I don't have any issues with it per se, but, and this is a big qualifier for my thoughts on it, "FINANCIAL RESPONSIBILITY" needs to be addressed and taken care of above anything else ! I don't know so much that those involved shouldn't be forced to have marriage or some type of partnering relationship defined. But the purpose should ensure that there are no "deadbeat" Dads or even "crack whore" irresponsible mothers. Society will welcome a new life, but parents quitting after the first "missed period" of possible pregnancy or first 9 months+ doesn't cut it with me, mistake or not. Divorces later in these people's lives should have court ruling and enforced judgements to ensure financial responsibility for as long as the children are minors if the 2 involved are trying to bail on one another for whatever reason. I don't care if they have to work 2-3 jobs, 24/7/12/365.
 

canuck_pa

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My brother got his girlfriend pregnant before marriage. Her mother was furious. My parents explained all the options available to them. They decided to get married. So my parents talked to the extended family and all their friends to let them know what was happening and to show they supported by brother and girlfriend. My parents wanted to be straight up with everyone. No sense hiding it. After that the family got involved with making it all work. My parents were thrilled to become grandparents. This year they'll be celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary.

When I was in grade twelve there was a period of 3 week where at least one girl a day quit school because she was pregnant. This was in an average middle-class suburb.
 

thadjock

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of people close enuff for me to call them friends (some people use that term VERY loosely) i can name 6 that were involved in a knocked up situation. 4 dudes. and 2 girls.

1 ended in abortion, and she has never gotten over it.
1 ended in a marriage that has lasted longer than 4 yrs and is still going.
2 others got married but broke up after 1 yr and 2.5 yrs after the babies were born.

either way u cut it, getting married cuz u knocked her up doesn't have a good success rate.

but even though i'm pro choice i don't and couldn't ever be part of the decision to abort a baby. so, married or not bring the kid into the world and work ur ass off to either find somebody else who can love him and give him a safe home, or make sure YOU do that for him.
 

nudeyorker

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The school that I went to if you got pregnant you disappeared and were never seen again. ( I'm not kidding) It happened to one girl freshman year and another junior year.
 

Principessa

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None! I grew up in an idyllic Happy Days like bubble in central Jersey. I was a nice girl as were all my friends.

There was a rumor in high school that a girl a year ahead of me had gotten pregnant and been sent away to live with an aunt in California. Her younger siblings never confirmed this. The story the family told was that she had become 'too wild' and was drinking and stuff and was sent to live with an aunt and uncle who were military and could control her. :rolleyes:
 

nudeyorker

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None! I grew up in an idyllic Happy Days like bubble in central Jersey. I was a nice girl as were all my friends.

There was a rumor in high school that a girl a year ahead of me had gotten pregnant and been sent away to live with an aunt in California. Her younger siblings never confirmed this. The story the family told was that she had become 'too wild' and was drinking and stuff and was sent to live with an aunt and uncle who were military and could control her. :rolleyes:
That's odd, I grew up in California and one of the girls who got pregnant was sent back east, sort of like a Bun in the Oven exchange program!
 

earllogjam

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I have a rather young cousin who got his girlfriend pregnant. They had the baby and he is still with her. Surprise! I don't think they had a formal wedding yet or if they are even married, but everyone just loves the baby.