OUTING. who's fair game?

[Xcuze]

When is it ok for you to tell the world about another persons sexuality?
Im including just about anyone in this;

A friend
Person living in same area
person at work etc etc but also...

Well known public figures; actors, singers and politicians etc

Who is fair game and at what point do they become fair game?
Is it ever justifiable to expose someone in that way?

 

[HaagenDazs]

By "outing" do you mean revealing someone who's homosexual/lesbian.

If so...what business is it of yours, and what place do you have to reveal it whether it's a distant stranger from across the ocean or your own twin brother. If it's not you, then it's not your business, in my opinion.

 

[Mr. Snakey]

When is it ok for you to tell the world about another persons sexuality?
Im including just about anyone in this;

A friend
Person living in same area
person at work etc etc but also...

Well known public figures; actors, singers and politicians etc

Who is fair game and at what point do they become fair game?
Is it ever justifiable to expose someone in that way?

I think someones sexuality is a private matter and outing them is wrong. Now in the case of a politician who is against gay marriage (Example) who is secretly gay himself thats a whole other matter and they should be outed.

 

[Principessa]

My gut reaction is to say, "NO." I hate when some tabloid or militant gay group forces an actor, singer, entertainer etc. to come out of the closet before they are ready. What's the point? It doesn't make me like the famous person less; but it does make me think twice about ever purchasing that tabloid or magazine again.

However, if I were head over heels for a guy whom I did not know was gay. Yet, one of my friends knew he was gay and just using me as a beard and didn't tell me I would be PISSED OFF! That is pretty much the only instance I think outing is acceptable.

When is it ok for you to tell the world about another persons sexuality?
Im including just about anyone in this;

A friend
Person living in same area
person at work etc etc but also...

Well known public figures; actors, singers and politicians etc

Who is fair game and at what point do they become fair game?
Is it ever justifiable to expose someone in that way?

 

[D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah]

if it a secret that only i know about then never, but if it is common knowledge and one person doesn't know then i think its ok to tell them

 

[red7.5]

I think someones sexuality is a private matter and outing them is wrong. Now in the case of a politician who is against gay marriage (Example) who is secretly gay himself thats a whole other matter and they should be outed.

I tend to agree with this perspective - however, the closeted politician type will deny everything. Then he either survives the fallout or he literally or politically, kills himself. Unless it's here in Mass. Then Gerry Studds or Barney Frank or Ted Kennedy will escape harm (mostly) and continue to make a difference. I love Massachusetts.

 

[prince_will]

quick post because i'm tired.

my friend found out that one of his classmates was gay and told everybody because "the world must know about it".

horrible, right?

and Perez Hilton, the largest troll with a blog, outs celebs frequently is even worse. what's the point of telling everybody about someone else's life?

 

[unabear09]

ok... I think outting someone is wrong. Its no ones business other than that person, and their partner.

I have a reason for feeling this way. When I was around 12 or so, I discovered my brother was gay. Well I was a little asshole, and due to my familial situation at the time, hated my bro. Well I took it upon myself to out my brother to my parents......and he was damned near disowned by both of them. It wasn't much later that he tried to kill himself. I hated my brother at the time and he hated me (really reallly bad home life, abusive mother, nonexistant alcoholic father, etc.), and as I aged and matured and learned many many difficult lessons in life, I realized the err in my ways and have asked for his forgiveness, and he has forgiven me many times. lol I also found out that he had done some pretty horrible things to me as well, behind my back, but I have forgiven him, and we've moved on with our lives.

My point is outting someone can have untold reprecussions. If its a friend or a family member, you could seriously jeoprodize this persons entire way of life, and thier existance.

 

[B_JasonDawgxxx]

I only agree with it when its some nut job in washington that has voted anti gay again and again.I love when those clowns are outed.If its just some shmo from everyday,Than thats his our her buisness

 

[mista geechee]

Outing someone is pretty touchy. If it important enough to them that they keep it a secret then tht should be respected. Why should it be one person's concern what another one does in teh bedroom. And why should one make it his or her duty to make someone's private life public ?

That's one of the most rude things I can think of that can be done. Talk about disrespect.

 

[hotbtminla]

I don't think it's ever "okay." A person's sexuality is their business, not yours, mine or anybody else's, and it's up them if, when, how and who they chose to talk to about what they like.

I agree with you NJ - when I see it in the media all it does is make me hate the show, magazine or blogger or who does it. It's the number one reason I cannot stand Perez Hilton (numbers 2-8 are irrelevant for the purposes of this conversation, as are the many reasons why I cannot stand Mario on a personal level).

I know of plenty of publicly "in" homosexuals who work in entertainment, some in glass closets and others who keep it on the DL like their life depends on it. Because their lives (livelihoods) do depend on it. For other-side-of-the-camera and backstage types like me nobody gives a shit, but for talent it's a completely different story. So when I see someone like Perez crusading like he's doing a good thing (for anyone other than himself) by dragging an actor or musician kicking and screaming out of the closet (regardless of whether they're actually gay, because I personally know at least two people he's targeted who are straight as rails) it makes me blow my top. First, who the fuck do you think you are? Secondly, you are playing a game with someone's life and career to make you feel better about yourself. I just find it to be gross, disgusting, juvenile behavior.

I think the same thing applies to friends, family and co-workers. It's their business, not mine.

But... I do agree that if the person in question is a politican, pundit or preacher who makes it part of their professional focus to demonize gay people or continue to perpetuate endemic homophobia and intolerance... those hypocritical assholes deserve whatever they get. To me there's a gigantic difference between someone like Larry Craig and someone like Neil Patrick Harris when it comes to "outing."

 

[D_Portelay Porquesword]

That is no one's business.

If it is someone of importance in public bathroom stall tapping his foot, someone needs to do something especially if that person has defamed the gay community in as many words.

Otherwise, I am glad the "Just come out Rosie" tees have faded from view.
Who cares? There are other more worth while interests to look for in life.

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

By "outing" do you mean revealing someone who's homosexual/lesbian.

If so...what business is it of yours, and what place do you have to reveal it whether it's a distant stranger from across the ocean or your own twin brother. If it's not you, then it's not your business, in my opinion.

I agree. This getting revenge shit on politicians or other peeps is bad karma dudes. What goes around comes around, and it'll come around to bite you in the ass.

 

[VeeP]

MYOB! :smile:

 

[mindseye]

I respect the rights of other people to live their lives as they choose, but I demand the same respect from them. This means that if a public official acts to limit my freedoms or treats me as a second-class citizen, they've started it, and in doing so, forfeit the respect I had offered them.

 

[unabear09]

I respect the rights of other people to live their lives as they choose, but I demand the same respect from them. This means that if a public official acts to limit my freedoms or treats me as a second-class citizen, they've started it, and in doing so, forfeit the respect I had offered them.

Very well said Mindseye!

 

[nakedwally]

When is it ok for you to tell the world about another persons sexuality?
Im including just about anyone in this;

A friend
Person living in same area
person at work etc etc but also...

Well known public figures; actors, singers and politicians etc

Who is fair game and at what point do they become fair game?
Is it ever justifiable to expose someone in that way?

Nobody has the right to out another person, it is morally wrong and in some cases can be considered slander in a court of law whether it is true or not

 

[D_Bob_Crotchitch]

I respect the rights of other people to live their lives as they choose, but I demand the same respect from them. This means that if a public official acts to limit my freedoms or treats me as a second-class citizen, they've started it, and in doing so, forfeit the respect I had offered them.

They've started it sounds just like kids on a play ground. Peeps could learn a lot from Martin Luther King, and Gandhi. Society will respond in compassion to people who peacefully fight for their rights. Name calling, and trying to mess up peoples lives tends to led to backlash.

 

[DC_DEEP]

I agree. This getting revenge shit on politicians or other peeps is bad karma dudes. What goes around comes around, and it'll come around to bite you in the ass.

It isn't about getting revenge, it's about fighting dishonest politics with honest politics.

My thoughts (with some reservation) are that anyone whose life work includes hypocrisy, then they have to be prepared for the consequences. Anyone who does the very things he condemns, and encourages others to condemn, deserves to be outed - whether it's a gay politician pushing for anti-gay laws, a religious leader who preaches "family values" and has a teen-age mistress in addition to his wife, a priest who is fondling young acolytes, a board member of MADD getting a DUI ticket, or the director of Above the Influence caught in his office with a straw between his nose and a line of coke.

Ordinarily, in most of those cases (except the molester), my philosophy is, "It's nobody's business." The difference in these cases, though, is that when a hypocrite is outed, it should illustrate that the crusade in question is not, in fact, the demon it's portrayed to be. "Hey, if rev haggard is doing gay sex, it must not really be as bad as he said it was." Unfortunately, and the reason for my "with reservations" caveat above, outing usually has the opposite effect. The hypocrite claims "See, it really is evil, see what it made me do? I got 4 days of counseling, and I'm cured now, but see what the lure of evil can do? It seduced even me."

 

[Deno]

there is no such thing as fair game when it comes to someones personal beliefs if should be up to them. I hate it when you have to listen to someone talk about somebody else no matter the subject. I totally believe the parable he without sin.