Overweight Women Cool? Overweight Men Taboo?

Guy-jin

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What do people think a 40" waist correlates to in a woman's size? Because as someone with a 33" waist who, by BMI, qualifies as overweight, I can only imagine a man with a 40" waist is well into the obese range, and therefore, an equivalently sized woman would also be quite obese.
 

whatireallywant

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What do people think a 40" waist correlates to in a woman's size? Because as someone with a 33" waist who, by BMI, qualifies as overweight, I can only imagine a man with a 40" waist is well into the obese range, and therefore, an equivalently sized woman would also be quite obese.

I actually think the BMI makes people out to be more overweight than they really are. I've read about athletes whose BMIs would have them qualified as obese, but they are just very muscular. My BMI is overweight bordering on obese - I'll accept the "overweight" part, but I think I'm in no danger of being obese anytime soon (unless I gain an awful lot of weight for no apparent reason!) I am, however, rather big boned (especially considering my height and all), and naturally muscular.
 

IntoxicatingToxin

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Wal-Mart's clothes are poorly made and likely to fall apart after 2-3 washings.:mad: Try Target for more fashionable yet inexpensive plus sizes.

Target doesn't carry clothes that fit me - they're sizes are fucked up, too. I can't even get their size 24 jeans past my ass... but I can wear that size from most other stores.
 

snoozan

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What do people think a 40" waist correlates to in a woman's size? Because as someone with a 33" waist who, by BMI, qualifies as overweight, I can only imagine a man with a 40" waist is well into the obese range, and therefore, an equivalently sized woman would also be quite obese.

You're in a 33 and BMI says you're overweight? Are you 2 feet tall? :biggrin1:

All I really know is my husband, who was about 230 at 6' 1" tall, when he was in a size 40 waist. By BMI, he was just barely in the obese category. When I was 205 in a size 16, my BMI was also just barely in the obese category. That's what I say they are equivalent. In both of our cases, we carried the weight well in that we still had pretty good shapes, even if they were big shapes. :biggrin1:

Right now, my husband is in a 34 inch waist and he's in the normal range for BMI. He's got a good bit of muscle mass going on which always mucks up BMI anyway. So 34 can be in the realm of healthy, as can 36 or even 38.

I actually think the BMI makes people out to be more overweight than they really are. I've read about athletes whose BMIs would have them qualified as obese, but they are just very muscular. My BMI is overweight bordering on obese - I'll accept the "overweight" part, but I think I'm in no danger of being obese anytime soon (unless I gain an awful lot of weight for no apparent reason!) I am, however, rather big boned (especially considering my height and all), and naturally muscular.

BMI is turning out to be kind of a farce. For me, my BMI is within the normal range, but I'm definitely still carrying some extra pounds-- most of it they fat around my waist which is the worst place to carry extra weight healthwise. I actually just signed up for a class where I'll get my body fat measured which is the best way to guage overall fitness. I have a feeling that I'll be somewhere around 30%, which isn't in the healthy range.
 

D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

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A people aren't looked down upon b/c they're fat...it's b/c when people look at them they see wha's in their near future..heart attacks, diabetes and it makes you feel bad for them.

Im a large girl and if that's how you'd look at me your got it all wrong. Yes i am overweight (by a lot) but every year i go for check up and have NO health problems, cholesterol, heart disease, diabetes, blood pressure .. everything normal. You have muscle - i have fat but internally in just as healthy as you.



As for clothes. i buy things like t-shirts at the mens department in Target because the women are 2 -3 times more expensive. They have a good range of stuff and for casul attire are very reasonable
 

D_Joseba_Guntertwat

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I don't know about fat women being cool, I suppose they are in the same sense that smokers and drinkers are cool - i.e. anyone who puts their own pleasure ahead of their own health is up for a good time.

It's interesting how the BBW label is used a lot as a badge of pride. Maybe there needs to be a BBM label too.
 

Guy-jin

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I agree with the BMI being a farce statement, really. It's the "best" number we have, but it's far from accurate because, like others mentioned, it doesn't account for muscle mass. It works in population studies probably because the number of body-builders in a given population is too low to skew it considerably, but on an individual basis, it's probably not the best gauge.

Anyway, I'll buy what you posted as "standards", Snooz.
 

snoozan

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Im a large girl and if that's how you'd look at me your got it all wrong. Yes i am overweight (by a lot) but every year i go for check up and have NO health problems, cholesterol, heart disease, diabetes, blood pressure .. everything normal. You have muscle - i have fat but internally in just as healthy as you.

I have to respond to this, and I mean no disrespect to you at all by what I'm about to say. You sound like my mother. My mother was physically active for most of her life, but was always heavy. As she got older, she got more sedentary and gained more weight. However, her blood tests always came back relatively normal and she had no real problems. She had cancer and surgery with that and had no real complications. She was a poster child for heart disease-- ate a lot of refined sugar, smoked, was obese, etc. but showed no symptoms except shortness of breath that was explained by her weight and smoking.

Three weeks ago she went to the hospital for routine testing and they found that 97%+ of all three heart arteries were blocked, one of her her carotid arteries was blocked, she has had diabetes that went undetected for years, and she has blood pressure problems. She's been in the hospital and has had multiple surgeries on her arteries and her heart, and is recovering, but very slowly. She'll be coming home on oxygen and a shitload of medication. Recovery from open heart surgery will take months.

My point is, the shit hit the fan with her over a very short period of time. She was asymptomatic for all of these problems. She looked for years like a fat person who beat the odds. As it turns out, she's lucky to be alive. It's good that right now you're still looking very healthy, but as you get older you may not stay that way.
 

snoozan

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I agree with the BMI being a farce statement, really. It's the "best" number we have, but it's far from accurate because, like others mentioned, it doesn't account for muscle mass. It works in population studies probably because the number of body-builders in a given population is too low to skew it considerably, but on an individual basis, it's probably not the best gauge.

Anyway, I'll buy what you posted as "standards", Snooz.

Yes, but will you buy me a ticket so I can take a ride on your bionic arm?
 

D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

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I have to respond to this, and I mean no disrespect to you at all by what I'm about to say. You sound like my mother. My mother was physically active for most of her life, but was always heavy. As she got older, she got more sedentary and gained more weight. However, her blood tests always came back relatively normal and she had no real problems. She had cancer and surgery with that and had no real complications. She was a poster child for heart disease-- ate a lot of refined sugar, smoked, was obese, etc. but showed no symptoms except shortness of breath that was explained by her weight and smoking.

Three weeks ago she went to the hospital for routine testing and they found that 97%+ of all three heart arteries were blocked, one of her her carotid arteries was blocked, she has had diabetes that went undetected for years, and she has blood pressure problems. She's been in the hospital and has had multiple surgeries on her arteries and her heart, and is recovering, but very slowly. She'll be coming home on oxygen and a shitload of medication. Recovery from open heart surgery will take months.

My point is, the shit hit the fan with her over a very short period of time. She was asymptomatic for all of these problems. She looked for years like a fat person who beat the odds. As it turns out, she's lucky to be alive. It's good that right now you're still looking very healthy, but as you get older you may not stay that way.

Yes i am well aware this shit catches up with you, And congratulations on you marvelous job dieting and the amount of weight of lost but i am a person, human and yes fat, NOT a walking heart attack waiting to happen
 

snoozan

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Yes i am well aware this shit catches up with you, And congratulations on you marvelous job dieting and the amount of weight of lost but i am a person, human and yes fat, NOT a walking heart attack waiting to happen

No, and that's not what I meant. I think your response to HellsKitchenMan was more to the point that no, not everyone sees overweight people and feels bad for them. I think that's a shitty presumption to make. I also know that not all overweight people are where my mom was. She's a pretty extreme example. But if you are overweight you are at risk for heart disease, and it never really clicked for me until this last few weeks how serious it could get even with someone who was perceived to be overweight but healthy. Mind you, you can still be overweight and relatively healthy especially if you keep on top of your doc visits and the like. I didn't mean to lecture, and I'm sorry if I did. I know how much people suck when it comes to dealing with people who are overweight, especially those who are terrified of being even 5 pounds overweight themselves.
 

D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

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No, and that's not what I meant. I think your response to HellsKitchenMan was more to the point that no, not everyone sees overweight people and feels bad for them. I think that's a shitty presumption to make. I also know that not all overweight people are where my mom was. She's a pretty extreme example. But if you are overweight you are at risk for heart disease, and it never really clicked for me until this last few weeks how serious it could get even with someone who was perceived to be overweight but healthy. Mind you, you can still be overweight and relatively healthy especially if you keep on top of your doc visits and the like. I didn't mean to lecture, and I'm sorry if I did. I know how much people suck when it comes to dealing with people who are overweight, especially those who are terrified of being even 5 pounds overweight themselves.

I'm sorry, i probably sounded a lot harsher then i meant to be. :hug; .
Ive been on both sides of the scale, and im sure you would know the world is a different place when your a plus size. I know there is nothing i can do about it but i hate the fact that i could be the nicest person ever (or anyone for that) but because im bigger i will always be pre-judged, and the fact tha people also assume im lazy and unhealthy makes it even more annoying

*rant finished*
:redface:
 

snoozan

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I'm sorry, i probably sounded a lot harsher then i meant to be. :hug; .
Ive been on both sides of the scale, and im sure you would know the world is a different place when your a plus size. I know there is nothing i can do about it but i hate the fact that i could be the nicest person ever (or anyone for that) but because im bigger i will always be pre-judged, and the fact tha people also assume im lazy and unhealthy makes it even more annoying

*rant finished*
:redface:

I completely understand. I've ranted on here many times before about how people treat fat people like shit. It infuriates me. I hated how people treated me when I was fatter, and I hate how some people I know now think it's okay to make fat jokes about when I was fat. I'm not a different person than I was a year ago, I'm just a smaller person. Taking this weight off has been one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life, and keeping it off is going to be even harder. I'm terrified. I think a lot of people have an almost irrational fear or being fat, and right now I'm one of them.

Anyway, you're a wonderful woman and I don't think that you need pity from any of these assholes who feel bad for you because you're overweight.
 

Lex

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As a chubby but healthy guy (40 inch waist) I've always felt that everyone should be healthier, but also respected. Often overweight people are looked down upon simply because of vanity, suerficiality, and cruel judgementalism.

That being said, I think it's also true that the old idea that it's more acceptable for men to be overweight than women has long passed from our society.

1) Can you imagine Lifetime's new show "How to Look Good Naked" telling fat men to glorify their bodies? I can't.....

2) Why is it that department stores offer sizes for enormous women, but men my size must usually shop at a big and fat store?

Any thoughts would be appreicated

My hubby is a larger guy--about 5'11" and 250. He has not had much trouble finding clothes. Actually, most of his jeans are lower rise (they look good on him) and we shop for shirts that hang and look well on him (he has a thick chest and broad shoulders). He has gained a bit more weight than he would normally carry due to some back problems. I think shopping depends heavily on knowing where to look for what.

I wear a 34x34 in jeans and most slacks. Most department stores run out of my size slacks and so I do most of my ordering from the department store's online websites (once I know the slacks will fit). JC Penney, for example, guarantees a wide variety of men sizes in stock (either in the store on available online with free shipping if you order from the store).


Stores like Gap, Banana Republic and more carry big and tall sizes that can also be ordered online.

I thought the Bear Culture was all about men glorying in their overweight, hairy bodies. Or is that just too queer for the OP?

It's not quite that simple. The Bear Culture was really a backlash against the ideal of manly beauty being incredibly thin/lean, and shaved and waxed (face, body, etc.). It grew out of the Leather Community. Not all bears are fat and being fat is not really a requirement. Many people identify with this community as it overlaps the biker/leather community, embodies traditional blue collar looks and stands in contrast to the ideal that we should all be thin and dress at Hollister and/or Abercrombie.

Bear (gay slang) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Wikipedia said:
The self-identification of gay men as Bears originated in San Francisco in the 1980s as an outgrowth of the gay biker and then later the leather and "girth and mirth" communities. It was created by men who felt that mainstream gay culture was unwelcoming to men who did not fit a particular "twink" body norm (hairless and young). Also, many gay men in rural America never identified with the stereotypical urban gay lifestyle, and went searching for an alternative which more closely resembled the idealised blue collar American male image.

I think in general women's weight is made much more a deal of than men's...

I never have understood this. I have seen many a thin, shapely woman with a guy who is larger and thought--why don't women place more pressure on men to be healthy (not thin). I know there are people who often expect me to like guys who look more like me (And I do to a point). I just typically take a guy's entire presentation into consideration when examining my own level of attraction to him.

I completely understand. I've ranted on here many times before about how people treat fat people like shit. It infuriates me. I hated how people treated me when I was fatter, and I hate how some people I know now think it's okay to make fat jokes about when I was fat. I'm not a different person than I was a year ago, I'm just a smaller person. Taking this weight off has been one of the hardest things I've ever done in my life, and keeping it off is going to be even harder. I'm terrified. I think a lot of people have an almost irrational fear or being fat, and right now I'm one of them.

Anyway, you're a wonderful woman and I don't think that you need pity from any of these assholes who feel bad for you because you're overweight.

Snoozan-- you have been a fierce voice in this regard for a long time--thanks. The hard work you have put into being healthy shows and you look magnificent. And you are right (as is the OP)--the bottom line is that we all should strive to be healthy. Not everyone will be 6'2", 205 as a man or 5'6" and 112 as a woman. You can be heavier and still be healthy and no one should feel less about themselves simply because their body falls outside of the "norm".
 

ThisSpace4Rent

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What do people think a 40" waist correlates to in a woman's size? Because as someone with a 33" waist who, by BMI, qualifies as overweight, I can only imagine a man with a 40" waist is well into the obese range, and therefore, an equivalently sized woman would also be quite obese.

I'm 6'1", 205 lbs, and wear a 38" waist. My target weight is 190, so I'm a little overweight, but not obese (just a little soft).

Like someone else said, I don't understand how you qualify as overweight unless you're 2 feet tall. Are you sure it's not something like your body fat ratio being too high? You can be underweight and still have too much body fat (from lack of exercise).
 

B_NineInchCock_160IQ

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definitely agree. Women aren't fat... they're "big and beautiful" or "voluptuous" or "curvy" or "a real woman" etc etc etc.

Men are still just fat.

At least in the current trends of language and groupthink. Not to say that there aren't still stigmas attached to both. Not to say that nobody has ever called a fat man "big boned" or "husky."

but where's the male equivalent of the movie "Phat Girls?" In it... some very husky woman has no luck finding men who tend to go for her toned and fit friend. All day long this husky woman dreams about being with body builder guys with 0% body fat like the ones she has posters of up around her wall. When she and her friends go on vacation they meet some men from another country who look like they are body builders themselves, but who love fat women. They explain that in their culture, the fat women are revered because it means they had more food. They don't explain why, then, they both have so much money (one works as a doctor) and yet there's not an ounce of fat anywhere on their own bodies. Has anyone else seen this ridiculous movie?
 

ZOS23xy

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I prefer myself to be lean, but the cold winter months finds me gaining about 15 pounds, no matter what I do.

I don't seek to push my view of myself on others, so I don't complain about someone being fat. I just don't want to be that way myself.

Still there was a point in my life where I weighed 210 pounds and developed this diabetic symptom of being thirsty all the time. Found it hard to put my shoes on. Had to roll out of bed. Spent some effort to lose 40 pounds. It felt good.

If you're overweight and don't want to be, help yourself deal with it. No one else can be more help to you than yourself.
 

snoozan

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definitely agree. Women aren't fat... they're "big and beautiful" or "voluptuous" or "curvy" or "a real woman" etc etc etc.

Men are still just fat.

At least in the current trends of language and groupthink. Not to say that there aren't still stigmas attached to both. Not to say that nobody has ever called a fat man "big boned" or "husky."

but where's the male equivalent of the movie "Phat Girls?" In it... some very husky woman has no luck finding men who tend to go for her toned and fit friend. All day long this husky woman dreams about being with body builder guys with 0% body fat like the ones she has posters of up around her wall. When she and her friends go on vacation they meet some men from another country who look like they are body builders themselves, but who love fat women. They explain that in their culture, the fat women are revered because it means they had more food. They don't explain why, then, they both have so much money (one works as a doctor) and yet there's not an ounce of fat anywhere on their own bodies. Has anyone else seen this ridiculous movie?

It's okay, I'd still let you fuck me if you were a fatty. You have such a nice personality. :tongue: