Parents Party With Kids?

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by goodwood, Aug 22, 2008.

  1. goodwood

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    This question is wide open and I hope people feel free to share their thoughts on this subject.

    Is it a good or bad thing for parents to party with their children? Is it good or bad for parents to be drunk and/or do coke with their offspring present say in high school/college or after? Should parents be the ones to teach their children how to party? Should parents pretend that their children will never do such things and turn a blind eye to boys and girls coming of age and let them figure it out on their own and not speak of it?

    I have known every extreme of the spectrum and have known the outcomes. I am curious to know how your parents were with you, how you will be with your own children. What say you?
     
  2. canuck_pa

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    I come from a family of 6, 4 kids and our parents. By the time I reached my mid-teens my parents were hosting a number of parties each year. We considered a group of 20-30 as a small get together. A party usually had at least 50 people, some had over 100. Us kids were encouraged to ask our friends so there was usually 3 generations of people (grandparents, parents and kids) The one stipulation was everybody mixed together. After the first couple of parties all my friends wanted to be invited. There was drinking but at that time drugs weren't a real problem. The parties were a lot of fun. My friends were very surprised that the adults were genuinely interested in them wanted to talk to them and treat them as adults. The music was a mix of 40's big band and contemporary rock'n roll. My parents were exceptional dancers and could do all the current dances and also taught us kids the dances from the 40's and 50's like the jitterbug.

    So from my experience multi-genrational parties are a positive thing. We all learnt how to mix with adults and how to behave accordingly. However given the current situation with drugs, I would say parents should not be doing drugs with their kids. My parents drank when they were underage and they knew we would too. The first time I got drunk was at mid-night buffet/party after my brothers wedding reception. My parents knew what was happening and the only thing my father said is " I can't wait to see how you feel tomorrow."

    If I was drinking at a friends they asked that I don't drive, so if I got drunk I'd stay where I was and call them in the morning so they knew I was okay.

    As far as drugs went, my parents knew I was doing weed and the only thing they asked is that I use my common sense and not to have drugs in the house.

    Looking at my friends situation at home, I guess my situation was rather unique but one that I am very thankful for. Today I don't drink and don't do drugs.
     
  3. CUBE

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    Parents should not party with the kids. Too many parents are living through their children and not setting examples. I deal with parents who will say I can't set a boundry because she is my best friend. Fools. It is my opinion if you teach your kids well and make them follow some standards...the reward for this will be you can be friends with your child when they become an adult.
     
  4. rover86

    rover86 New Member

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    my parents never partied with me, but back in high school i'd lose a nugget or two of pot every once in a while. still makes me laugh.
     
  5. numberseven

    numberseven New Member

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    My folks are not party people, but are casual drinkers, so we were always around it from a young age, and they would let us try if we asked, but not until we demonstrated the responsibility to handle the consequences would we be given a drink of our own.

    I think it really depends on the parents and on the kids--I'm sure there are families in which this would be acceptable and would work, but I'm sure they are few and far between. It would require healthy and grounded individuals and a network of good relationships between everyone, I'd imagine; the nutshell of all of this, I guess, is proceed with extreme caution, and back off at the first sign of anything going awry.
     
  6. Principessa

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    QFT! Preach it brotha, you speak the truth! :cool:
    I agree! This ridiculous trend of parents thinking they need to be their child's friend started in the early 1970's and combined with a few other things, America has been on a downward spiral ever since.

    That's why you send your children to school so they will make friends, learn to play and party with people their own age. When you blur or eradicate the lines between parent and child no good ever comes from this.
     
  7. Ed69

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    Good luck to the fools willing to share in this thread.Maybe your cell will have velvet lighned bars.
     
  8. Principessa

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  9. Viking_UK

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    I think families should party together. My parents weren't really party people. They'd occasionally have friends round and would have a few drinks, or we'd go with them to visit their friends, but that was about it. We'd all get together for weddings etc where you'd have up to five generations mixing together. I think some of the social problems we're seeing today are as a result of families not spending time together and not knowing how to relate to each other. I grew up surrounded by people of all ages, from newborn to over 90. A lot of kids these days don't have much contact with anyone older than their parents and many don't even have a proper relationship with them!

    I don't approve of drugs at all. Alcohol is OK in moderation. I got my first drink from my parents. They knew we would drink anyway and wanted to introduce us to alcohol in a controlled environment. As a result, when I left home, I didn't go crazy and start getting drunk like a lot of my friends when they left home for the first time. The worst I knew was a minister's son who'd had such an oppressive upbringing that as soon as he got away he started drinking, smoking and screwing around. He's now got God knows how many kids by different mothers and has a drink and drugs problem. Which of us had the more sensible upbringing?
     
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