A boy comes home from school and says to his mom, I lost my virginity today". His mom replies angrily, "You tell your father about what you've done, when he gets home!" His dad comes home about twenty minutes later and he tells his dad that he lost his virginity. His dad says, "Good job son! How was it? Then the son says, "It was pretty good Dad, but do you have any Vaseline? My ass hurts."