Partner has ADHD(help)

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by rayray, Nov 22, 2010.

  1. rayray

    rayray Active Member

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    I dont know what to say but this disorder of his is driving me crazy.His Doc has had him on Adderol for the past year but this med is making it worse.I have spoken to his Doctor about it and because of the HIPPA laws i do all the talking..On this drug his compulsive shopping,hoarding,driving while multitasking,taking his eyes off the road is going to kill me and others if does not stop.He will start projects ten at a time and never finish anything and he is always looking for something he has misplaced or lost and last paranoia..Any suggestions would be welcome..Thank You!
     
  2. hungguy4hungguys

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    Just being medicated is half of the battle. There's still the behavioral side that needs to be addressed. Does your partner recognize that his habits have worsened? When did he get diagnosed? I myself was diagnosed in 2007. I'm on Stratterra for the ADHD, but my psychiatrist has recently prescribed me Wellbutrin as well as it seems that I've been depressed for a while.
     
  3. Daisy

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    Honestly that doesnt sound like ADD to me at all. That sounds like some kind of mania. (Manic Depressive?) I have ADD although it's not ADHD I can still totally function. The guys has way more going on than ADD and if doctors are throwing Ritalin (like drugs) at him and that's it..then no wonder he's not getting better. Most ADD is managed by therapy which teaches coping mechanisms and maybe some kind of medication if it truly helps. I would advise him to find a new doctor.
     
  4. coachreffn

    coachreffn Active Member

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    Yes, I agree that your partner does not sound like the typical ADHD person. There are some behavioral issues. He has learned behavior in his past and developed habits....a good psychologist would be working with him on his behavior and his psychiatrist should be adjusting his meds. Please be patient with him as he makes these adjustments and it does take some time. Seeing another doctor is a very good suggestion.
     
  5. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    My first thought was also that it sounds more like mania than ADHD. And meds for ADHD will make a person MORE hyperactive if the person doesn't have ADHD, because they have a similar formulation to speed. I would advise getting a second, and if necessary third, opinion. Sooner rather than later.
     
  6. D_Percival Plunger

    D_Percival Plunger Account Disabled

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    That actually sounds like "bipolar" or manic depressive episodes. I am bipolar and I would do all of those things when i am manic; luckily, now I have some medication and relaxation techniques on my side. I would def. ask for a second opinion. and sometimes if it gets too bad, you may need to step away for a while. Help from a distance, but don't get dragged down into it.
     
  7. Ric1

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    it may worth trying to get a second opinion from a different doctor and seeing if there is an alturnitive that would better for both of you. your life sounds as it is affected by it as much of his.
     
  8. AlteredEgo

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    If it really is ADHD, martial arts might help. That's what keeps my husband sane. He has a very severe case (I'm told) but is extremely tolerant of the medication, and so hasn't been on any in nearly a decade. Sometimes he literally runs around our house making noise and chasing the dog, but he has no real behavioral problems that I can see. He says martial arts training gave him the tools he needed to focus his mind.

    Nothing my in-laws say about my husbands past behavior sounds remotely like the man described in the OP. I think a second opinion is a great idea. People are misdiagnosed all the time.
     
  9. texasman469

    texasman469 Member

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    After been tested and results confirmed, I have ADHD. However medication is not a silver bullet. It also requires some behavior modification and also a recognition of the various coping mechanisms that we use to be totally functional. I've taken Adderall. But I have actually found that Vyvanse is much better. Originally on Adderall, I was taking 3 70mg extended release pills every day. 2 in the morning & 1 in the afternoon. But with Vyvanse I found I only need to take 30mg per day. If I take more than 30mg per day, my focus on tasks and projects is nearly unbreakable.
    I wish you luck. There are lost of information available. But I've relied most on the direct information from neurologist & psychiasts who have studied, performed advanced research on ADD/ADHD. Vyvanse does have good materials to assist.
     
  10. Frodo46888

    Frodo46888 Active Member

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    Everyone's body chemistry is different, so the meds that work for some may not work for others. And as mentioned above, behavior therapy must be part of the program.

    ADD/ADHD has been overdiagnosed in schools and pills prescribed as the magic cure, but sometimes a diet change can help enough so that the meds aren't necessary. The drug industry has programmed us to believe that all our problems can be solved with a pill.
     
  11. BBCP

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    Who diagnosed him? Was it a psychiatrist or a general practitioner? That doesn't sound like ADHD to me. If it isn't, that might explain why the Adderol isn't working. For most people who are non ADHD or ADD, Adderol is a huge stimulant and can CAUSE many of the symptoms you describe. College students use it to stay up for studying and as a recreational drug.

    Does he know he has a problem? If not, there might not be much you CAN do other than be supportive. Best course of action, IMO, is get a specialist opinion, preferably a psychiatrist.
     
  12. sexplease

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    How lovely some western medicine is. If they can't find the proper outlet or. solution - Medicate.
    First. If something is often used ( like keys or forks or cars) always keep them in ONE place
    Second: he needs to explore and try physical activities. I rock climb,play piano, kayak, boogie-board, ride my bike, walk if I'm not painting from sun rise to sunset. ( I have ADHD. It's 4 am and after 5 hours sleep I'm up.)
    Third: do you know the story about the woman who won a Tony for Cats? Years ago her mother took her to a doctor for ADHD behavioral "problems" - she fidgits and can't sit still and bounces around etc etc. Today, our illustrious medicine man would stick her on aterol or ritalin ( what I was on a kid)
    This smart doc turned on a music station, left the girl in his office and took her mom to an adjoining room with a 2-way mirror. As they watched her daughter jump and dance to the music, the doctor explained, there wasn't really anything wrong with her - she's a dancer.
    Imagine a world with zombie kids on Meds. We'de not have Cats or several other peices of hers. Or countless other creative blessings from our ADHD and ADD Citizens.
    Let him dance, or fly or run and jump. Get him off that crappy and do YOUR best to enjoy the time you spend together.
    Those Meds are cages. Let him free.
    And lastly: make certain rules where the safety of life - his and others - apply. Put the phone in the glove box while driving. No running with scissors. Sit for 5 minutes (which can seem like an eternity to us hyper individuals) and think... think about cause and effect.
    Ok, gotta run ... literally

    Michael*
     
    #12 sexplease, Nov 23, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 23, 2010
  13. rayray

    rayray Active Member

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    Thanks too all who have responded to this...He does see a Psychiatrist and he is the one prescribing the Adderol..My partner is aware of the problem and is depedant on these pills because of the energy they create..He does know he has a problem. When he runs low on his pills he becomes more of the person I know, less flighty and more reasonable (tolerable).He also crashes to where he stays in bed for a few days.We dont talk about it much because it makes him angry..He recently was approved for disability by Social Security.I read the paper work and it said in their that he was diagnosed bi-polar. He was approved not only from that but from a very bad back, he has had extensive surgeries..I dont know who made the bi-polar diagnosis..The only good thing i can say is that the doctor wants to see him before he gets his new prescription as i told them i want to remain anonomous. I will see if my talk to the doctors office helped.I would have a bigger problem if he knew i did this..
     
  14. sexplease

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    Oh and one more very important thing: diet. I basically follow Fit For Life. Look it up on amazon. Fruit in the morning, complex carbohydrates all day and protein in the evenings.
    It's how you'd feed a human if they were stuck in a zoo.

    M*
     
  15. sexplease

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  16. Mal_the_Wolf

    Mal_the_Wolf New Member

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    i have ADD not adHd, but I can tell you from experience the adderall causes all those symptoms and is crazy Addictive, its basically synthetic cocaine.
     
  17. hungguy4hungguys

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    Ummm, not to be daft, but were you responding to me or the original poster of this thread? I can assure you I'm not manic depressive.
     
    #17 hungguy4hungguys, Nov 24, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 24, 2010
  18. B_curiousme01

    B_curiousme01 New Member

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    Succient, to the point, and helpful. Very good reply
     
  19. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    Thanks :smile:
     
  20. runrunrun

    runrunrun New Member

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