You need to make her aware that while you know it is her hormones that are causing the bad behaviour it is still unacceptable to treat you like that and that you, as a couple, need to work your way through this.
I've had issues with PMS - there wasn't much screaming or direct fightiness, my major problem seemed to be my sense of humour would take a significant leap sideways and at the same time I became hypersensitive to anything that could even be vaguely construed as criticism and also completely insensitive to the effects my words might have on others. This caused fights because I'd either make a 'joke' that was actually not funny at all but hurtful, or I'd get all bent out of shape over something Hick said that I'd normally take as funny - then I'd sulk, or bitch at him, or both. It wasn't pleasant for either of us.
I knew what the cause was and I decided to see if I could find some diet / supplement based remedy to help me (I can't take oral contraceptives due to other issues and there's no point now as I no longer have a uterus). I did a bit of reading around and thought I'd try Calcium and Vit D supplements as they seemed fairly inoffensive and certainly easy to get. I also asked Hick (and the offspring) to call me on my shit. The Calcium and Vit D supplements did seem to make a difference - I still get the moodiness but it seems easier to control and less intense. The supplements also had the added side effect of reducing breast tenderness considerably - though as you can see from my thread in WI that doesn't always work.
Had the supplements not had any positive effect I would have gone to the doctor as a next step to try to find a solution.
I had a hysterectomy last year, leaving my ovaries intact, and I had some blips after that, in terms of PMS sneaking up on me - well, I can't really call it PMS, it has to be POS (post ovulation stress) - The reason I mention that is because it lead me to the conclusion that a large part of controlling the hormonal swings (or at least being able to ride them out with upsetting those around me for a week) is to do with
awareness. Once I know when it is coming I can adjust my behaviour accordingly as the hormones kick in. These days I just have to watch for different signs as there's no Day1 to mark on the calendar.
All of that is how it works
for me - I don't always get it right but I think one of the things that makes it easier on those around me is that I try. I don't know how your other half is at trying. Perhaps she does try to keep it in check and her mood swings are just much worse than mine. I don't know if she recognises the problem at all. If she does but is of the opinion that you and she just have to let it happen and deal with it for a week then you have a problem.
Basically you need to sit down with her (during a NON pms time :smile
and talk with her about it. Let her know that even though her behaviour is not intentional that it can't go unchecked.