Certainly it did bother me, but it occurred to me as you've suggested that it was said from a place of homone-fueled cruelty.I am guessing, Guy, because you are logical and analytical that you are disturbed by the comment of her only being able to confront you when she is in this situation and that therefore, there are reasons for the behaviour beneath or behind the hormonal effects. Perhaps it is more like a drunk sounding off on the effects of alcohol and shouldn't be taken too seriously, though should be noted.
I weathered 20 some years of these behaviours from my wife thinking she was a certified nutcase but finally realized the patterns were cyclical.
I took it in the ear many, many times and bit back many times also.
Sheesh, during her threats of divorce I have even told her I wouldn't divorce her until she had a full psychological evaluation.:redface:
A while back she "went off" on me big time and yet I took it like a good husband 'tho I LOVE to fight!
A couple of days later she asks me "I was really cruel to you wasn't I?"
I said "Yes, you were".
Thankfully, that opened her eyes to what was happening and she ACTUALLY took to heart the suggestions I had been making over many months to try some herbals to counter the affects.
My saviour has been Evening Primrose Oil and Hormone Essentials for her and we can both tell when she runs out or stops taking them.
I can hardly tell when she's going to cycle anymore.
Fascinating thread! Thanks Guy-jin!
Yeah, I've never met a bitchy gay man.It's so nice being gay...no pms
Mr. Guy-jinn, does she keep a journal?
sometimes keeping a record of how her mood is jumping around can give her some perspective. something like "i kinda wanna throw a shoe at Guy's head... because he is breathing too loud"
when she's not possessed by her ovaries she can go over the last couple of entries. realize why she's pissed, how she reacts is based more on her mood at the time and less about anything you're doing or anything you're responsible for.
sort of an index of cuntery. maybe she'll see the pattern.. maybe start developing less aggressive/destructive coping mechanisms?
Nuff said. :tongue:Stupid PMS.
wow, sorry to hear what youre going through. ive never experienced eny kind of extremes like that while going through pms. ive been emotional, where things that im usually insensitive about can make me upset or a little emotional, but never to the point of being angry and screaming at somone. are you sure it is pms causing the problem? i do know a very close friend of mine has bipolar disorder, and for her it came in cycles, one week she would be horrible to be around and the next 2 to 3 weeks she would be perfectly fine. it was almost like 2 people trapped in the same body. i never thought to ask her if the disorder was triggered around that time of the month. hopefully you two can discuss it and figure out all of the options to get it under control. best of luck to you
PMDD
for true.. would bet money on it.
probably combined with PCOS.
why i am saying PCOS cuz she's having irregular bleeding/cycles. when the ovarian follicle doesn't burst during a normal cycle of ovulation the ovaries keep pumping out insane levels of hormones. no ovulation = no period/funky cycle. kinda rotating from long cycle, short, long short.
morse code for you have PCOS.
mix it with PMDD, ya got dramatic mood swings like the happy/sad/hate you/i'm fat all in 5 mins thing Mr. Guy is talking about.
I h ave an EX who is bi-polar and we didn't know it at the time. Some days I never knew who would be waiting for me when I got home from work. The nice boyfriend, or Satan. Eventually it destroyed the relationship, though we remain friends today. My current partner is moody sometimes, and can be fairly unpleasant for no real reason. Most of the time it is stress related to his adult children continuing to act like adolescents. They tend to have a lot of drama swirling around them and try to drag him into it. When it isn't that and he's just being a bitch, I find ignoring him works really well.
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This is an interesting thread, I am glad I read some of the different situations and experiences posted here.
Reading this was kind of eerie...my ex is also bipolar, and we too are trying to be friends now. And it seems to be working out so far, about a year since we ended the physical relationship and we took a few months away from one another just to get some space. I know that when he is either "up" or "down" he doesn't do the things he should, like someone else mentioned, such as getting enough sleep and eating regularly, but he is also a stubborn son of a bitch and lashes out at the person who tries to help him, or suggest that he do something as simple as go outside and take a short walk.
I just wanted to acknowledge your post. My heart just hurts for anyone who has loved someone who is bi-polar. What you describe is just so true. Again, you've shown such kindness & courage by maintaining a friendship. I know that the person who is ill, would never choose to be this way and they deserve love, so you being able to remain in their life is very meaningful. :hug:
How about roommate mood swings? If I were an angry man, I'd strangle her. Talk. Talk. Talk. Never shuts up. I feel like I'm married again....
PMDD
for true.. would bet money on it.
probably combined with PCOS.
why i am saying PCOS cuz she's having irregular bleeding/cycles. when the ovarian follicle doesn't burst during a normal cycle of ovulation the ovaries keep pumping out insane levels of hormones. no ovulation = no period/funky cycle. kinda rotating from long cycle, short, long short.
morse code for you have PCOS.
mix it with PMDD, ya got dramatic mood swings like the happy/sad/hate you/i'm fat all in 5 mins thing Mr. Guy is talking about.
Oh, I think you're right. According to this recent ultrasound, she has "tipped" or "nonsymmetrical" ovaries. She's had ovarian cysts before. I'm pretty much positive she does have some kind of cyst (although she doesn't seem to have many of the symptoms of PCOS). I think after she gets together a very accurate record of the unusual cycle combined with the PMDD/PMS symptoms, her pain during the bleeding, etc. the doctor will be convinced to take a closer look at her annual in April.
This time around she had a hormone panel and everything was normal. But it was done immediately after her period, which doesn't really say much.