Penis Size References In Movies

[thirteenbyseven]

"I just needed another six inches," so says Brooke Burns. In this case the 5' 9" ex-Baywatch babe was referring to her bottoming out in a swimming pool back in November. But her comment got me wondering. Having just rented the atrocious movie Band Camp in which totally hot actress Arielle Kebbel snaps, "I've seen it, I wasn't impressed," negative penis size references got my male ego in a fluster. Are we males getting "short changed" in the movies?

For every well hung reference such as the character Meat back in the old Porky movies, there seem to be a dozen miniscule-tiny-micro- phallus remarks on camera, usually uttered by an attractive female lead to a dazed and bewildered male protagonist equipped with the male seductive powers of a lampost. Is this just my imagination at work or is there an evil female body politic at work here exploiting the most sensitive of all male issues, his wanger?

Of course I have always been a human dichotomy, rediculously well-endowed and with the aformentioned male seductive powers of a lampost. Nevertheless, I ask this board to search their collective movie base and post all movie verbal and visual penis size references.

Example: From the low budget cult favorite The Van; "Uh, your..ah...bigger than Duggan..." "Really...bigger than Duggan?!" In this case a well- endowed albeit scrawny dweeb ends up seducing the major ta-ta-ed girlfriend of a muscle dude with the intellect of a 1977 Chevy Van.

You get the idea.

 

[Bigteen]

I'm going with movies and TV.
Just what I can remember...

Moulin Rouge: Satine rips open Christian's pants and exclaims "Big Boy!"

And I know that Friends has mentioned on several occasions the fact that Chandler was well endowed. In "The One Where Chandler Takes a Bath" Chandler is in the bathtub taking a bubblebath when all the others come in.
Phoebe: (upon seeing what's beneath the bubbles, she turns to Monica) Mozeltov!
Ross: Dude, rearrange your bubbles.
Monica: Here, honey. You can use your boat. (She hands him a plastic battleship)
Chandler: It's not aircraft carrier.

 

[Matthew]

There's a scene in Tango & Cash where Sylvester Stallone and Kurt Russell walk into the prison shower together and one calls the other 'pee wee' or something like that ... can't remember the exact words but it was an obvious dick size schtick.

 

[D_Elijah_MorganWood]

Trick:
(Drag Queen): Huge penis. HUGE. Trust me Gabriel, I know. I KNOW.

 

[Dr Rock]

who could possibly give a crap

 

[Bigteen]

what a waste of a post. plus its really annoying. Don't you have anything better than going around telling other people that what they're talking about is useless?

Grow up.

 

[B_RoysToy]

what a waste of a post. plus its really annoying. Don't you have anything better than going around telling other people that what they're talking about is useless?

Grow up.

Maybe there are those who like to hear themselves talk?

 

[Pecker]

Snot-nosed teen vs Dr Rock.

Anybody betting who wins?

 

[MsLulu]

HAhahah, you have to love borderline retards who have to question every post.

OMGZORZ.... Y 4 U talkin' BOUT somethin' so GHEY. OMG... UR ALL SO Dumm!!! HAhahah.. LOLOlolorlzorlol.!!~~`~``111 N' UR all TardZ cuz onLEE I - MITEY INTERNET G0D Will DICKTATE Teh TOPIKS!@@! Xkuze me Whyle I go Beet off 2 N'Synk Posturz....

 

[Dr Rock]

who could possibly give a crap

I dislike having to repeat myself, please pay more attention in future

 

[Mattness]

what a waste of a post. plus its really annoying. Don't you have anything better than going around telling other people that what they're talking about is useless?

Grow up.

Bigteen...just ignore the very, very nasty Dr. Rock like the rest of us...it makes life more pleasant.

 

[Bigteen]

thanks Mattness, duly noted.

 

[B_Hickboy]

HAhahah, you have to love borderline retards who have to question every post.

OMGZORZ.... Y 4 U talkin' BOUT somethin' so GHEY. OMG... UR ALL SO Dumm!!! HAhahah.. LOLOlolorlzorlol.!!~~`~``111 N' UR all TardZ cuz onLEE I - MITEY INTERNET G0D Will DICKTATE Teh TOPIKS!@@! Xkuze me Whyle I go Beet off 2 N'Synk Posturz....

You are far too good at that, MsLulu.

 

[MsLulu]

I learn the l33tsp3ak from playing uber MMORPG gamez!!! I freelance write for some of the fictional content for various computer games (WoW, EQ) so I get to play for free and explore. Naturally, I come into contact with a lot of interesting people!

And Dr. Rock, plzstfukthx

 

[Donk]

. . . the character Meat back in the old Porky movies . . .

Speaking of which, I rented the DVD of Porky's a while back to rewatch that movie for the first time in many years. There is one scene--when the guys are running away from the house where they went to hook up with the prostitute--where there is a full frontal nude shot of "Meat" leaping off the porch. If you pause the DVD right there you can see that the actor who played Meat was, shall we say, not exactly typecast.

 

[thirteenbyseven]

Donk, I believe it. After I posted my message I recieved a crazy email from a guy who claimed to have inside information that actor Dan Monahan, who played Pee-Wee, was actually much larger than Tony Ganios who played Meat. Of course we'll never know, but the guy who emailed me said that he was employed as part of the lighting crew in the first of the Porky's series. Anyway the following was inside info he supplied about the filming.

There was one scene where the group of actors were "lined up" for inspection by an actress playing the part of a prostitute. She was supposed to feign astonishment at the sight of Meat's mighty organ ("I swear that boy's deformed.") Well poor Tony Ganios' little penis poked out about 4" from his well toned 6' 4" physique, and every time she got to him she would laugh and forget what she was supposed to say. Around the third take she got to Tony and let out "Let's see, I'll take that one (Monahan's penis) on that body (Tony Ganios)." Everybody but poor Ganios roared. The lighting guy also said that since the actress was married to an ex-NFL Hall of Famer, everybody was very well mannered on the set.

 

[jonah]

bump anyone think of any other movies?

 

[B_IanTheTall]

I remember a few from television shows, but none from (non-porn) movies.

Other than Debra Messing's facial reaction, in "The Wedding Date". Dermot Mulroney has a fine ass, too bad Messing's eyes aren't mirrors.

 

[TWZR21]

Did you guys already say Christian Troy from Nip Tuck? He said he had a 10" in season 2.

 

[~quicksilver~]

There's that brilliant scene in Big where Tom Hanks wakes up in the body of a man and goes to the mirror, looks into his underwear and says "wow!"

The best one I can think of though is the character in The Full Monty... When he goes for his audition and Robert Carlyle says "so you can't sing and you can't dance...what exactly can you do?" and the guy says "well, there is this..." and drops trou. The resulting facial expressions are priceless!