People are asking why.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by someperson, Jan 12, 2012.

  1. someperson

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    I getting a little annoyed that family members are asking why I do not have a girlfriend. Because Right now I am not interested in getting one or having one. THey have been hounding me on and off for the last few years. They started doing they 5-6 years ago.
    23 now.
     
    #1 someperson, Jan 12, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 12, 2012
  2. ManlyBanisters

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    So, tell them not us. We don't give a fuck. Well, I don't, I suppose I shouldn't speak for anyone else.
     
  3. Adrian69702006

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    Ignoring the first response to your question which was, quite frankly, rude I would say the following:

    If and when you decide to look for a girlfriend is a matter for you and you alone. I'm sure your folks have only your wellbeing and best interests at heart though.

    Relationships can be, and often are, fantastic. However they involve us in sacrifice, of time, money and commitment. They also involve us in a degree of vulnerability, emotionally and otherwise. Sharing aspects of our lives which would otherwise be private with another person requires a great deal of trust - and that's why trust is so important. You're far better off waiting and, hopefully, finding the right relationship than rushing headlong into the wrong one. There's one thing worse than not being in a relationship - and that's being in the wrong one.
     
    #3 Adrian69702006, Jan 12, 2012
    Last edited: Jan 12, 2012
  4. D_Jacqueline_Boozann

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    Tell them, "when I find one, you'll be the first to know!"
     
  5. B_Nia88

    B_Nia88 New Member

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    Coming out is hard but surround your self with good friends and I am sure your family will love you no matter what.
     
  6. ManlyBanisters

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    The OP doesn't list his sexuality.

    The OP has no question - just an observation. My 'we don't give a fuck' refers to whether or not he has a girlfriend but if people want to read it as rudeness there's nothing I can do about that.

    If people are pissing the OP off by asking him the same shit all the time he needs to choose between putting up with it or telling them their question is annoying and requesting that they stop asking.
     
  7. someperson

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    Perfectly secure with my sexuality as a straight man..
     
  8. D_Sal_Manilla

    D_Sal_Manilla Account Disabled

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    sorry but i would just tell them that its not their fucking business. It used to happen to me too. Little did they know i was gay... lol
     
  9. Adrian69702006

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    Thanks for the clarification. Points noted. However, it's perhaps true to say that 'we don't give a fuck' wasn't the best choice of words.
     
  10. Viper73

    Viper73 Active Member

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    Someperson,

    Trust me, I know how old that question gets...

    After having four serious relationships blow up in my face due to them cheating I basically decided to take some time to go back and focus strictly on myself, my career, and what I want.

    Now, 2-3 times a week I get hounded by my family if I'm seeing anyone or they reminded that all of my cousins and stuff are married and have kids.

    I have to admit it does get me depressed having it thrown in my face so often. However, I made up my mind that I'm not going to live it based on everyone else's terms. It actually got to the point where I told my parents in no uncertain terms to back the f$%k off.

    Not to generalize, but women (at least in Indiana) seem to all be either crazy or just want someone for the moment, nothing long-term. I came to the conclusion that I can actually do much better myself without all the additional drama. I already have enough drama in my life as it is and don't really feel light getting hurt again.
     
  11. Adrian69702006

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    I can identify with that. On the basis of past experience I can tell you matters aren't so very different in England.
     
  12. redbear52

    redbear52 New Member

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    Tell them you really prefer fucking sheep and they probably won't bug you any more.
     
  13. rbkwp

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    People are asking why.
    I getting a little annoyed that family members are asking why I do not have a girlfriend. Because Right now I am not interested in getting one or having one.


    Identify OP, also with Viper, and im primarily? gay ha
    on top of that, part Chinese, of the age or at the end of the age re arranged marriages, I was in China in 79 and this was tried ..subtely, no way, but respect them for trying

    So OP, think you will cop it for many years to come, im afraid....
    (till you appease them...doubt that will happen ha)
    some folk just expect everyone to be in a committed relationship..absolute crap,in my books
     
  14. AlphaMale

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    They are probably the "If he isn't constantly dating a chick or married then he's gay" type. Don't mean that to sound too harsh, but unfortunately quite a bit of people are like that. Also, most people who are like that are really closet gay or bi themselves and that's their way of hiding it from the world.

    One of the top reasons why people get into relationships nowadays (dating or marriage) is so that other people will think that they aren't gay or bisexual. They succumb to the idiotic societal pressure that is put on them. So, I think you are doing the right thing and not giving a damn.

    You can choose who you want to date and when you want to date them. Just tell them that it's none of their business! :tongue:
     
  15. dong-in-khakis

    dong-in-khakis New Member

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    @ Manly Banisters..

    I bet you can count your friends on less than two fingers. What in the hell has life done to you? You sound like some bitchy old woman who is mad at the world. Then again that's not hard to see.

    Get out.
     
  16. ManlyBanisters

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    Fuck you. :smile:
     
  17. open501s

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    I use to get hounded all the time by my extended family on this issue.

    It is what I hated most about the holiday's.

    Try telling them you have a hooker that you hook up with every month and she please you just find now -- you don't have time for a girl friend. Then tell them you just want money for X-Mas, Birthdays, &c.
     
  18. aninnymouse

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    Seriously, without sounding rude or condescending, I don't know what we're supposed to do to help you.

    Why is it you're not interested in a relationship? Do you have other goals, a la work, school, etc? If that's the case, tell them. That's pretty much all you can do. IF they don't understand, fuck them.
     
  19. ManlyBanisters

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    Not literally, obviously. I doubt that'd go over well.
     
  20. B_jeepguy2

    B_jeepguy2 New Member

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    I used to get the same thing. About the time I turned 35 it abruptly stopped. Not sure it was the fact that I turned 35 or the fact that the same year my sister had a baby and they were too preoccupied with their new grandchild to care. Now they have two grandkids, a boy and a girl and I have not been asked the question "when are you going to find a woman and settle down" in several years now. LOL
     
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