Perceptions of myself and others....long post

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Imported, Nov 11, 2003.

  1. Imported

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    nacard01: Well as I can speak from experience that "god's" humor can be seen from time to time. I myself belief that a majority of guys who could be handed a list of traits they would want for themselves would choose personality, intelligence, physique, cuteness, and more then likely penis size. I for one got the King's share I would say. I am one of those guys that if you were to walk by me on the sidewalk would either want to have sex with me or at least think about some aspect of me sexually. Even without knowing about my penis size.

    Although I realize that a lot of guys think having a real big dick is cool or having a bigger one would be cool. There must be a point where you reach a limit of "coolness". Being realistic in my own case, what good does having a 13" dick grant me? I am bigger then other guys? Obviously.....but from a sexual standpoint as well as a social standpoint its nothing but a hinderence. Sure there are guys/girls out there who want to be with big guys. But what will a 13" dick give you that say a 10" dick won't? Realistically nothing, both are large sizes. Once you reach a certain length/width through your development or penis enlargement methods what is an extra inch when you are already 10" long? NOt much in my opinion. The ridicule that I have faced has been more geared towards others unacceptance of my size in what can be described as the "normal" sense. I know I have an extremely above average sized penis. It's something I have to deal with daily in what I wear, others perceptions, sex, etc etc. Things that most guys take for granted. The reason I say this the way I have is simply due to the fact that when a friend of mine says, "God I wish I was as big as you". I understand why they say it but realistically they have no idea. I have been told by dozens of people even on LPSG that I should be proud of what I have and appreciate the fact that I am huge. Well it isnt about proudness or realizing that I can show up most any guy. Its about enjoying what I have. Most guys/girls do not want to be with someone of my size and I really can't blame them.

    Lets say for a moment that my attitude on the subject was completely different. That I showed up other guys and took extreme pride in my size. What does it change? I gain more envy of guys? I get more looks? More comments? This is my opinion of course but it doesn't "help" you any.

    I have used my size in the past on a few occasions to get something I wanted but in those instances I was drunk. To speak on my own defense and by no means do I presume to speak for all of you who have large endowments but have you ever really thought of what it would be like to be 9" instead of 11"? or 7" instead of 9"? Sure you wouldn't be as "big" but you also would live your life just as others do minus some variables.

    I guess what I am trying to say is. I realize that I am larger then probably 95% of the population. Oh boy, lucky me. The only thing being huge has granted me throughout my entire life has been a problem with clothing, ridicule from friends, difficulty doing everything other people do because I could hurt myself and sex related problems that hinder my choices and desires. Guys that want to be bigger....thats fine. Just think about what it is like for those of us who are so big that it affects our life.

    I am sorry for ranting. I just read through some posts and felt like giving my feelings on the issue. Whether you disagree or agree with me, I do not know. I would never presumably speak for any of you, I was just merely trying to make you see some of the other perspectives available to someone who knows all to well what its like, namely me. =)

    Nate

    P.S.
    My apologies for the length of the post. I just felt like typing a lot out. As always if you want to talk my chat accessabilities are listed. <waves>
     
  2. Imported

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    nacard01: I forgot to add something. I do not mean to sound egotistical about myself. I am just merely stating a fact. I like being caring, smart, cute and desired but If I could change it, I would shave some inches off.

    Nate

    Hope no one gets too bent out of shape on the angle I took on the post. Just being honest about myself and what I honestly think of others.
     
  3. Imported

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    HUMONGOUS: you sound more self-assured than egotistical
     
  4. Imported

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    dr_drew2: Nate,

    It is obvious that you have given this much thought and I empathize with you. While my size is nowhere near you, I can understand what you're saying. Most guys or girls don't understand what you've experienced or encounter. It is my hope that your presence in the group has helped you discover that you're not alone. Others have had similar experiences.

    Am always available for a chat, btw.

    Cheers,

    D ::)
     
  5. Imported

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    digibacker: [quote author=nacard01 link=board=relationships;num=1068541432;start=0#0 date=11/11/03 at 00:54:52]...when a friend of mine says, "God I wish I was as big as you".  I understand why they say it but realistically they have no idea.[/quote]

    I think you've hit the nail on the head. They're thinking of the perceived benefits without the genuine awareness of the real liabilities. When someone mentions the problems, they brush it off and say, "well, I think those are problems I can live with!" but they simply don't have the perspective of experience.

    They've generally come to this conclusion well after becoming a fully-developed male (that is, once they realize that what they've got is all they're getting). This isn't the right perspective to judge. They'd have to start right at the beginning -- go all the way through childhood, adolescence and young adulthood as the "proud" owner of an overly-large penis. Only then would they truly understand the significance of such a trait.

    As far as your perception of yourself, there's a difference between being conceited and confident. Just from what I've seen you write, and our brief chat, I tend to think you fall on the side of confident.

    Instead of saying, "I'm great," you say, "I'm lucky." That shows that you're aware of your blessings, but are grateful for them rather than feeling entitled to them.

    (By "blessings" I specifically mean the traits like appearance and personality you are comfortable with.)
     
  6. Imported

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    pghcyclist: Nate,

    I hear what you are saying. It's often hard for people to understand that relationships are about more than just having sex. While sex is certainly one component in a relationship, it is not everything.

    I'm certainly not as hung as you, so I don't have first hand experience of what you are going through. As a rule, I tend to prefer pretty vanilla sex. Sex should be about giving pleasure to an intimate partner. Some people prefer intercourse, some don't. Some prefer oral stimulation, some don't. Some people prefer masturbation. There aren't really any rules, and I think a lot of time people forget that.

    Someday, someone will recognize all your good qualities and you will be able to work with that person on ways of expressing your love sexually. Until then, keep your pecker up (ok ok, keep your chin up, it just seemed the britishism is more appropriate in this forum :) ).

    Scott
     
  7. Imported

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    junk792: [quote author=nacard01 link=board=relationships;num=1068541432;start=0#0 date=11/11/03 at 00:54:52]I guess what I am trying to say is. I realize that I am larger then probably 95% of the population. Oh boy, lucky me. [/quote]
    Actually with 13 inches that's probably more around 99.9% (or more)... From the stats I think 95% of men are smaller than something around 8"-9".
     
  8. BobLeeSwagger

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    ....I'd think of you sexually. As a straight guy who has no sexual attraction to men, I don't think that would happen. I think it's very amusing that you think so, though! :D
     
  9. benderten2001

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    Nate,

    I've been "watching you" (reading / following a number of your LPSG posts!) since you've joined us.

    And, I'm really glad you're with us, you know. And, I admit to being one of the ones who officially welcomed you here and extended the invitation to join in with the rest of us.

    And, so very well you have, too.

    In fact, ---WE'VE learned from you.

    Now, I'm giving some special thought to these comments of yours, though:


    [quote author=nacard01 link=board=relationships;num=1068541432;start=0#0 date=11/11/03 at 00:54:52]

    "... in my own case, what good does having a 13" dick grant me? .. from a sexual standpoint as well as a social standpoint its nothing but a hinderence.

    .. what will a 13" dick give you that say a 10" dick won't?  

    ... The ridicule that I have faced has been more geared towards others unacceptance of my size in what can be described as the "normal" sense.  

    ...Most guys/girls do not want to be with someone of my size and I really can't blame them.

    ... The only thing being huge has granted me throughout my entire life has been a problem with clothing, ridicule from friends, difficulty doing everything other people do because I could hurt myself and sex related problems that hinder my choices and desires. "

    [/quote]


    Nate, I'm recalling your very first post when you mentioned a rather "rough beginning in life". 'Seems you've struggled through a number of issues which other men would have NOT come through as well as you! I hope you realize how strong a man you really are, friend!

    Forgive me, Nate. I'm twice your age. And, yes --
    I could communicate personally via IM or e-mail with you to share these thoughts, but perhaps others reading will benefit from this.

    Being much older than you, I can say that life has "redirected my thoughts and my value systems".
    What seemed to matter so much earlier in life has been replaced with more (pertinent, serious matters). I used to be terribly self-conscious over my (small!) size (or, so I thought!), my ackwardness with women, my lack of interest to date regularly, ---general overall confusion over self esteem / sexual issues and acceptance of myself. Somehow, as the years have ensued, my attitude has changed though. It had to. I had more important matters to deal with which came up. Those experiences helped me to mature and put things into entirely different (more properly I think) perspectives. For me, it took "going to the school of hard knocks in life". Unemployment, serious family illness, financial challenges and setbacks, etc. I want you however, to "get a grip" early on BEFORE you face such issues in life-- which may or may not come along for you personally-- I don't know. But, you have SO MUCH going for you right now---way beyond those 13".

    What you need friend, is more self confidence in yourself as a man BEYOND the penis size. You have shown us here in your postings that you speak from a compassionate, tender side of your being. That "speaks" volumes. It means so much in life to be sensitive and in touch with others' feelings. Real (manly) attrributes --whether society recognizes these or not. You're ahead of the game there, too!

    I want to believe that, in your course of life, you will be led to someone out there who will accept, adore, and lavish you with love and adoration for the INNER you and not just the "physical" you. Your "size" is of consequence, truly. But, size should NOT dominate your life or your life's choices, Nate. There are ways that, in time, your "size" can be dealt with in constructive, purposeful, MEANINGFUL ways. Not all women (or men) who provide good choices for mates seek size or, are turned off by it. They look for other qualities. Don't be persuaded by today's society and modern media that "everyone is the same" in their views and outlooks.
    There are untold millions of women and men in the world who still have dignity, morality, and great true wisdom of life. You need to formulate ways to meet them!.

    It will take some effort on your part to determine to get your life's priorities in focus--including the effort to feel more positively about yourself and the will to put together some really exciting dreams for your future.
    Go ahead! --Shoot for the moon. Get away from the (debilitating!) notion that your large penis size will forever limit you to ever enjoying life or a meaningful relationship. It does NOT have to be that way!

    Those persons who have been in your life thusfar, and, those negatively impacting experiences in your life have, (somehow) managed to misdirect your perception of yourself and how life has to be. These ideas should be "drained away" from your psyche like dirty motor oil.
    It's poisoning you and your outlook on life in general.

    I still hope you can draw the needed encouragement, positive motivational wisdom from others here within the LPSG that your life CAN be more meaningful and purposeful. Many of us are trying to do just that, meagerly or not. --But, we are trying.

    And, THAT'S exactly why we're here! ;)
     
  10. Imported

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    wvalady1968: Bender, that was beautifully done.
     
  11. Imported

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    Krowax: The penis complements a man, it doesn't make up the whole of him.

    Or something.
     
  12. Imported

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    Krowax:
    7.75x5.75-8x6 is at around the 90th-95th percentile. So you're probably more in the 99.999999999th (not joking about the decimals)
     
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