I'm here mostly because I'm hoping for some understanding from men in general, but I'd appreciate women's input as well. I don't talk about sex with anyone I know in real life in any real way. It has been a couple of years since I've had any sexual relationship. I've also always had problems talking or communicating with my ex-husbands or ex-boyfriends in different ways. Since being single, I've also learned a lot more about sex and sexuality, probably since I have all this time to read and not practice, right? Seriously though I know I really suck at understanding relationships and men. I know I've misunderstood a lot. It also doesn't help that I realize I often fall for guys that are often bad for me, at least in some ways. Sometimes I think I have bad taste, heh, but sometimes I think it's just because I'm a little desperate and they don't seem half bad, at least for a while. I usually had guys (husbands or boyfriends) that would eventually dump me. One of the first signs I would have a clue was when they would be disinterested in having sex. This always made me feel extremely insecure about my sexuality and sexual performance. If it helps, I was with each guy for at least six to nine months before they showed beginning signs of being sexually disinterested, though our relationships often lasted at least two years or more. Often at the end of the relationship, the sex was completely gone except for a sort of last hoorah type of thing. The thing is at least two different ex's eventually would show some interest, at least temporarily, after breaking up: they'd come back for booty calls, or whatever, or a temporary rekindling of a relationship for a while until they got tired of me again (or found somebody else). I usually attributed this to simply men being horny and need to get laid, but not sure if it was more than that. My last ex-bf was, I suppose, my favorite booty call for a while. It was annoying because he'd just show up out of the blue, but when we starting fucking, it was great. (The sex, at least for me, was always hot.) As usual though, he's leave within an hour. Unlike some, he never really made me feel bad or slutty; maybe that's why I didn't mind the booty call relationship. Incidentally, he stopped coming by when he met his now-wife; that was about three years ago. Okay, so that's a long story, but basically, I really wonder about how to know if at least I'm a good lay, why guys would leave really (good sex? bad sex? whatever), how much of it is really about sex, etc. especially if they sometimes come back to at least get their rocks off. Or, at least, what do guys think about their booty call girls (women). With my last ex, it was actually a relief to be able to just have sex sometimes with someone I'm already comfortable with, but without the hassles and restrictions of a a relationship. It was a good thing going for me then and if I can't have a real (full) relationship, I wouldn't mind a friends-with-benefits thing, if it could be mutual.