phone sex*

D_Roland_D_Hay

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Pleeassse.... Im busy on a long distance call, and ive got three call waitings.....

Im thinking of setting up a switchboard tonight to handle the calls

"This is a recording, hello caller, yes, please hold, you are number 145 in the queue, we take your call seriously and someone will be with you in a minute, please hold, you are being charged at a peak rate..." :biggrin1:
I would hope that my call would get priority!!!
 

Damian Johnson

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I would hope that my call would get priority!!!


"Hello caller. Please press 1 if you are an unknown caller, you have pressed 1, you are now number 1,234 in the queue, the current waiting time in the queue is 2 days, 4 hours and 37 minutes, we take your call seriously and someone will be with you, please hold, a series of Madonna hits will now play, please hold"

"Please press 2 if you are a member of LPSG, thank you for pressing 2, you are in a priority queue and your call will be answered shortly, you are number 23 in the queue, please hold caller,"

"Please press 3 if you are Rico. Thank you Rico. You are number one in the queue, putting you through to Damian Johnson right now caller...."

:biggrin1:
 

D_Theophallus Kneedgroin

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"Hello caller. Please press 1 if you are an unknown caller, you have pressed 1, you are now number 1,234 in the queue, the current waiting time in the queue is 2 days, 4 hours and 37 minutes, we take your call seriously and someone will be with you, please hold, a series of Madonna hits will now play, please hold"

"Please press 2 if you are a member of LPSG, thank you for pressing 2, you are in a priority queue and your call will be answered shortly, you are number 23 in the queue, please hold caller,"

"Please press 3 if you are Rico. Thank you Rico. You are number one in the queue, putting you through to Damian Johnson right now caller...."

:biggrin1:


*Numbers123 clears his throat*
 

Damian Johnson

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*Numbers123 clears his throat*


"Hello Rico, sorry to cut you off and put you on hold, we have a call waiting for Mr Johnson, its Numbers123, sorry you have been placed temporarily on hold, please hold, Madonna singles will now play, you are being charged peak rate for this call"

"Hello Mr Numbers, sorry you have been on hold, you are now number one in the queue, just putting you through to Mr Johnson caller,"

"Hello Rico, sorry you have been on hold, we are just patching you into the conference call with Mr Johnson and Mr Numbers, please press XX1463 on your phone now to connect your call, thank you Rico, you are now connected...."

:biggrin1:
 

D_Theophallus Kneedgroin

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"Hello Rico, sorry to cut you off and put you on hold, we have a call waiting for Mr Johnson, its Numbers123, sorry you have been placed temporarily on hold, please hold, Madonna singles will now play, you are being charged peak rate for this call"

"Hello Mr Numbers, sorry you have been on hold, you are now number one in the queue, just putting you through to Mr Johnson caller,"

"Hello Rico, sorry you have been on hold, we are just patching you into the conference call with Mr Johnson and Mr Numbers, please press XX1463 on your phone now to connect your call, thank you Rico, you are now connected...."

:biggrin1:



I love how you aim to please!!!!
 

Damian Johnson

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"Hello caller, please press 1 if you want Damian Johnson to be a hard aggressive top on the line with you and talk dirty slutty things in your ear as he jerks his big stiff cock"

"press 2 if you want Damian Johnson to be a submissive greedy bottom, and hear him spit into his hand and massage his boy gash and stick his fingers in his sex hole as you talk dirty to him over the phone"

"press 3 if you want Damian Johnson to be a top and a bottom, and jerk and finger his man gash all at once as you pour filthy phone sex talk to him"

"press 4 if you want to be involved in a filty dirty orgy involving Rico, Savage, Hellboy, Numbers, Monster and a range of other cock craved sluts from LPSG"

"Hello caller, you have pressed all four options, this in invalid, please re-dial and start again"
 

D_Theophallus Kneedgroin

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"Hello caller, please press 1 if you want Damian Johnson to be a hard aggressive top on the line with you and talk dirty slutty things in your ear as he jerks his big stiff cock"

"press 2 if you want Damian Johnson to be a submissive greedy bottom, and hear him spit into his hand and massage his boy gash and stick his fingers in his sex hole as you talk dirty to him over the phone"

"press 3 if you want Damian Johnson to be a top and a bottom, and jerk and finger his man gash all at once as you pour filthy phone sex talk to him"

"press 4 if you want to be involved in a filty dirty orgy involving Rico, Savage, Hellboy, Numbers, Monster and a range of other cock craved sluts from LPSG"

"Hello caller, you have pressed all four options, this in invalid, please re-dial and start again"


*numbers presses 4* oh wait, I'm already a part of this :biggrin1:
 

Damian Johnson

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*numbers presses 4* oh wait, I'm already a part of this :biggrin1:


"Please caller! Please hang up! You have been hogging the line for the last 45 hours talking dirty slutty filth into the phone! You have had your time! Your phone bill is now $6,000! Please hang up! There are 2,574 people in the queue including Hellboy, Savage and Hung, who want to get through on the line, please hang up caller and try calling again later! Please caller! You are obviously cock craved and sex mad! Please hang up or we will disconnect this call!"
 

Damian Johnson

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"Hello caller, thank you nick, you have pressed 4, putting you through caller! My god caller that's a sexy body and nice cock you got between your legs! Hope the voice is a dusk and sexy as the rest of you! Putting you through caller"
 

yogo

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NUMBER 4 FOR ME PLEASE :biggrin1::biggrin1:

"Hello caller, please press 1 if you want Damian Johnson to be a hard aggressive top on the line with you and talk dirty slutty things in your ear as he jerks his big stiff cock"

"press 2 if you want Damian Johnson to be a submissive greedy bottom, and hear him spit into his hand and massage his boy gash and stick his fingers in his sex hole as you talk dirty to him over the phone"

"press 3 if you want Damian Johnson to be a top and a bottom, and jerk and finger his man gash all at once as you pour filthy phone sex talk to him"

"press 4 if you want to be involved in a filty dirty orgy involving Rico, Savage, Hellboy, Numbers, Monster and a range of other cock craved sluts from LPSG"

"Hello caller, you have pressed all four options, this in invalid, please re-dial and start again"
 

Damian Johnson

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"Hello caller,

Press 1 to hear a big hunky uncut guy jerk his big stiff cock and listen to the sound of his delicious foreskin as it rides over the head of his cock"

"Press 2 if you wanna hear a big beefy circumcised lad spit on his hand and lube up and wank his big sensitive exposed cockhead! Hear him thrash and moan as he has to work that big wet cocktip to a climax"

"Press 3 if you wanna hear a big sexy uncut lad dock and slide his foreskin over the cockhead of a big sexy circumcised lad! Hear them both moan as their sensitive cockheads rub together under the silky smooth foreskin hood"