Pick-up lines

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by august86, Apr 6, 2011.

  1. august86

    august86 Member

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    So I stumbled upon some pick-up lines. Some hilarious, some cheezy and others, downright nasty.

    What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.

    Did you fart? Because you just blew me away

    Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

    Your body is a wonderland and i want to be Alice.

    If you were a booger I'd pick you first.

    [Gesture for person to come over]
    I just made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with the rest of my body.

    Person A: [Walks up to B and gently pulls up B's collar and looks at the tag in B's shirt] [Hmphs] [Pauses] [Walks away]
    Person B: What the hell? What was that? etc...
    Person A: Oh... I was just checking to see if it said "Made in Heaven.
    "
    If I could be anything, I'd love to be your bathwater.

    Can you think of any more?
     
  2. BUSTERHYMAN

    Gold Member

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    How about these pick up lines ...
    The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
    That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning.
    I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
    I like every bone in your body especially mine.
    How about you sit on my lap and we'll see what pops up?
    Will you be my love buffet so I can lay you out on a table and take anything I want?
    Why don't you sit on my face and let me eat my way to your heart?
    Baby I'm like milk, I'll do your body good.
    Is that a mirror in your pants because I can see myself in them.
    Hey baby lets play army I'll lay down you can blow me up.
    If your left is thanksgiving and your right leg is Christmas can I visit you in-between the holidays
    If I told you that you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
    You're like a Pringles. Once I pop you, I can't stop you!
    I want to kiss you passionately on the lips, and then move up to your belly-button.
    Is it hot in here or is it just you?
    If you were a car door I would slam you all night long

    Baby, your so fine, I want to pour milk all over you and make you part of my complete breakfast.
    How about you sit on my lap and we'll straighten things out
    Baby, I'd run a mile for your vertical smile. Nice shirt.... wanna fuck?
    If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put U and I together.
    Are you from Tennessee? Because you're the only ten I see!
    Can I have fries with that shake!
    I've got the F, the C, and the K. All I need is U.
    You're so sweet you're giving me a toothache.
    Hey baby, can I tickle your belly button from the inside?
    If I had eleven roses and you, I'd have a dozen.
    Hi, I'm new in town. Can I have directions to your house?
    Pardon my is there a mirror in your pocket because I can see myself in your pants.
    Do you know CPR because you take my breath away.
    Your daddy must of been a drug dealer 'cause you're dope.
    My face is leaving in 15 minutes...be on it!
    I'd look good on you.
    When does your centerfold come out.
    So do ya wanna see something really swell?
    I've seem to have lost my number, can I have yours?
    I've got the hot dog and you got the buns.
    Is your name Gillette? ...because you're the best a man can get.
    Are we near the airport or is that just my heart taking off?
    I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I sure can make your bed rock.
    You have nice legs. What time do they open?
    Do you like Subway? How about my foot long?
    Hey that dress looks nice. Can I talk you out of it.
    Is that a keg in your pants? Cause I'd just love to tap that ass!
    Are those pants from outer space? Cause that ass is out of this world.
    You're like a championship bass, I don't know if I should mount you or eat you.
    Is your dad a terrorist? Because your the bomb!
    Are you a parking ticket cause you have fine written all over you.
    If I flip this coin, what are the chances of me getting head tonight?
     
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