Pillow Talk

[13788]

Just A Guy: This is a collection of the more memorable conversations and events I have had over the years dealing mostly with penis size.

:unsure:
(her) “You have my dream penis.’
(me) ‘What?!?’
(her) “Your so big it almost hurts.”
(me) “I can’t imagine a women enjoying being hurt like that.”
(her) “I can’t speak for other women, some might like to be tickled to death, others torn to pieces.”


(me) “You kind of looked surprised when you saw me..” (erect)
(her) “Ohh yes…my widdle eyes pop out of my widdle head.”


(her) (long moan) “oh…..shit, no, I came too quickly….ohh….. how did that happen?….damn…” (after riding me for 30 seconds)
(me) ‘does that mean I am supposed to be annoyed at you now?’

:blink:
(her) (takes my hand in hers and seems to stroke it, but I realise she is looking at it carefully instead)
(me) “What are you doing?”
(her) “hmmm? It was (just) something X (her girlfriend) told me last week…”
(me) “Yes?”
(her) “She said how you could tell a mans penis size by reading the palm of his hand.” (she gestured along my hand)
(me) (laughs) “So… what does it say?”
(her) “It says you have a small penis.”
(me) “Yea.. right... so your going to go back to tell her (about me) and say she is full of crap?”
(her) “You think I’m an idiot? No way she’s finding out…”


(her) (looking up at the ceiling calmly) “Fuck”
(now, to get perspective, this lady never, ever, swore, not when angry, not when frustrated. To hear this word come out of her mouth so matter-of-factly was akin to being in church and hearing a preacher speak it from the pulpit as his sermon for the week.
(her) “I never liked the word, I always thought it was (ugly), but there’s no way to describe it but fuck…. you fuck me… I’m fucked...”


(her) “You really hit the spot…”
(me) “Thank you….”
(her) (looks at me seriously) “No… I mean you hit me inside.. (gestures against her tummy). You know what I mean…?”
(me) (looks blankly at her)
(her) “No… of course you don’t.. (shakes head) look, don’t get me wrong, sex with you is fantastic, its really good… at the time, but it leaves me sore for days afterwards. (looks sheepish) I’m not sure it’s worth it….”

B)
(me) (thrust thrust thrust)
(her) “mmmm…. your a perfect fit for me…”
(me) (deep thrust)
(her) “Ahhh! ….stop…. too deep!”


(her) (while trying to ride me) Oww… damn it… noo… its no good… I cant ride you… (climbs off and gets upset)
(me) (trying to calm her down) “Look.. it’s ok, there are plenty of other positions, its all right….”
(her) “No… no…no…. that’s how I cum…” (she starts to cry)

:mellow:
(her) ‘I can take you, but I pay for it afterwards.”

:unsure:
(her) ‘What do you think about anal sex?’
(me) ‘Good grief, if you tell me it’s hard to take me vaginaly (from an earlier conversation) how is something like that going to work out?’
(her) ‘Ohhh there are ways…’ (I passed up the option to explore them though, not because I am a prude about something like that, but because I thought I might hurt her and so the idea was an instant turn off)

-_-
(her) (holding my penis and talking half to it and half to me) “I think it’s a good thing I’m older than you, if I was your age I wouldn’t know what to do with you.”

B)
(her) (in frustration) “Sometimes I don’t know whether to throw you off or hold you on.”


(her) “I was talking to X last week..” (X was her husband who had found out about her ‘fling’ with me, but who had ‘forgiven’ her for it, not knowing it was still going on). ‘He was fishing around… he said ‘I suppose he’s a bigger man than me’…. I (looked annoyed) and asked why men were so obsessed with size when it didn’t matter, and I told him he was a better lover. He smiled at me. How could I have told him the truth, that he was inadequate in both departments? It would have devastated him. In many ways being with you has been the worst mistake of my life, because I know what I don’t have now.”


(her) ‘God… you penetrated me so deeply…. I wonder if you could hurt me without me knowing... I should talk to my gynaecologist about it.’ (looks troubled)
(me) ‘What’s the matter?’
(her) ‘Well, he knows X (her husband… yea another wife.... naughty me), I could say I had deeper penetration with X than usual but he would wonder why I had never asked the question before… he would get suspicious.’
(me) ‘Perhaps a different gynaecologist then?’
(her) ‘Yes… that’s a good idea.’

h34r:
The following is part of a conversation I had with a male friend who was also hung (apparently). It was a long conversation, I have had to re-told it in a short form so you get the idea of it.

(him) “I get tired of going down on woman.”
(me) “Bah, I never get tired of that, I could spend all day down there.”
(him) “Yea, but I bet you get blow-jobs…”
(me) “err… well…yea… I guess…?”
(him) (makes a circular gesture with his hand indicating he is thick, obviously thicker than me I guess, otherwise I would have found the same problem as often as he did)
“Its my hassle I know, I guess I’m being selfish, but its gotten so that I don’t like going down on a woman because she cant go down on me. I look at how big a woman’s smile is now just so that I have an idea if I can get lucky later.”
(me) “Yea… well I have had my own disasters…(I make a gesture indicating length) but not so many like yours..” (I indicate a smaller circle with my hand and he laughs). “Anyway woman are supposed to appreciate thicker men more.”
(him) (somewhat bitterly) “Maybe they do, they don’t need to worry about giving them head then.”


(her… holding my penis in a double hand baseball grip)
“I have softball tommorow"

:blink:
(her) “If you die and come back as a ghost will you still be so well hung?”

 

[lapdog2001]

A few of my own:


(her) (holding/stroking my penis and looking back and forth between it, and my face)
(me) What?
(her) You're huge!
(me) Really?
(her) Yes, really!
(she proceeds to take my virginity orally, and later vaginally.)

B)
(her) (holding/stroking my penis) Hmmmm, big boy.
(me) Really?
(her) Yes, you're hung like a black guy. (she was Dominican)
(me) Thank you!
(her) You're lucky I like'm big, or we could have a problem here (smiling)

Every woman I've been with has commented on the size of my penis, but these two 'first encounters' stick in my memory!

 

[SpeedoGuy]

You are really big!

Oh my god!

I thought so!

Uh oh.

Do you always cum that much?

How long is it?

Have you always been hung like that?

Can I measure it?

SG

 

[GottaBigOne]

Sadly (i guess) I've only been with women that don't really feel comfortable talking about it, i have had come more subtle comments but not anything worth retelling.

 

[KinkGuy]

I guess my favorite was a "one nighter" with a bi-couple, and when we were naked, the wife asked me "why are your balls so big?" She then turned to her partner and asked him, "why aren't yours that big? I thought they were all the same size." Took the wind out of his sail, so to speak.

 

[11incher]

Originally posted by KinkGuy@Oct 15 2004, 05:28 AM
I guess my favorite was a "one nighter" with a bi-couple, and when we were naked, the wife asked me "why are your balls so big?" She then turned to her partner and asked him, "why aren't yours that big? I thought they were all the same size." Took the wind out of his sail, so to speak.

[post=259613]Quoted post[/post]​

When I was with my last couple the wife saying I can't take a cock that big the bending her over and fucking the shit out of her as her husband jerked off

 

[13788]

doug699: " Oh My..... Oh my god"

Talking to her best friend " so of the girls complain about thier boyfriends sclong, not me with Mr Huge here" this is all with me standing three feet away, her friend immeaditly turns and stares at my crotch LOL


" Damn my knees hurts! I wish I could just sit down, but no way!"

" Umph!"



" Get that beatiful dick inside me quick"


" im going to rape you under those benches if they dont hurry up"



" uh ,.,,,,, you definitly dont have a small one "

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

"I wonder if I turned the oven off."

 

[Mighty Joe]

"Is It In Yet?"

Something most people on this forum will never hear.

 

[D_that's a tall order]

"So, is this your first time in the convent?"

 

[13788]

NelsonMuntz84: " Jesus christ how thick is that thing!!!"

"Your cock is thicker than my wrist"

"I expected it to be long but not so wide" :blink:

 

[madame_zora]

"You better make me cum or I'll kick your butt!"- from the movie Orgasmo.

 

[longbaugh]

Mein Got Mein Got
Girl I met in Switzerland

 

[FieldRatt9]

<_<
(Her) Oh my God&#33; I think you just popped my cherry&#33;?
(Me) You&#39;re 22 right?
(Her) Yes but my last 3 bf&#39;s weren&#39;t as big as you. Am I bleeding?
-I pulled out and checked-
(Me) Well I have some blood on my shaft.
(Her) Man that hurts&#33; Go faster.



(Her) Quick turn on the lights. I gotta see this&#33;
(Me) Why?
(Her) Because it feels so good.

:lol:
(Me) Just relax, I won&#39;t hurt you.
(Her) You&#39;re about to shove a 2x4 up my cunt and you expect me to believe it&#39;s not going to hurt&#33;?

:blink:
(Her) Geeze, we need to go back to the bar.
(Me) How come?
(Her) I&#39;m not drunk enough. You&#39;re going to hurt me.
(Me) I got beer in the fridge.
(Her) Whatever, I want you up my ass. Get me drunk&#33;

These were some of the more memorable ones.

 

[hose 85]

" You tore me up &#33;" an old girlfriend

"I&#39;ll pay for that tomorrow" The wife

" I feel like your still in me" The wife

" Oh shit not so deep you&#39;ll bruise my cervix again &#33;" The wife.

" You made me cum when you put it in me, I&#39;ve never been stretched like that." an old girl friend.

" You and that damn cockring, the head swells any more and I won&#39;t be able to take it." The wife


Just my 2 cents, J.

 

[13788]

Jesse: Cool stuff, how big are you Just A Guy ?

 

[13788]

voktpuah: "You know you have a big cock right?"
"...ththat&#39;s what they tell me."

 

[B_black10inches]

"It&#39;s really big, but I like you anyway."

 

[B_Hickboy]

"I&#39;m going to build a church in its honor."

Me: "There, now, that&#39;s not so scary is it?"
She: (Holds it in both hands.) "It&#39;s scaring ME&#33;"

"I came as you entered me."

and finally, the one we&#39;ve all heard: :grr:

"Please stop."

 

[BruceSter]

Okay, some more quotes from my l/f (I understand this thread is the sequel to the "Quote your partner..."):

AS: "Well, Mr. Ster[XXX], you&#39;re ready for a not-too-hostile takeover?" (this sentence exists in a whole scale of meanings, from "friendly" for lovemaking, to "hostile" for hard, sweaty romping)
***
AS: "Mhmmm, whatever filling your bank account is lacking, your briefs surely make up for."
***
AS: "Come on, drill for oil, you big boy"
***
(This one came out once as she approached me from behind while I was naked)
AS: "I feel like I need an apple now..." (* Drops to her knees, puts both hands on my ass cheeks and bites *)