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Please Tell I’m Not Crazy! This Is Not Racist...

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by 916416, May 11, 2019.

  1. 916416

    916416 Guest

    I’ll keep this brief.

    A white guy DM’d me here to state he believes Pet & I “don’t like white people especially white guys”. After asking where he got this idea from he stated it’s because Pet has never been with a white guy before. That’s it. Nothing more.

    This is a fascinating, if slightly disturbing, discussion and I’m wondering if others think the same.

    If a woman does not fuck every race of man does that mean she is biased? If a woman turns down a black man is she racist? If a black woman won’t fuck white men is she racist or just prefers a certain race?

    My answer to all of the above is: of course she isn’t racists and has agency over herself. However clearly this is not a universally held truth. What day you?
     
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  2. 916416

    916416 Guest

    Btw I’m choosing to believe this guy is playing a role for the moment and believes zero of what he is saying. Otherwise...nope I’m not going to believe he is that ignorant lol.
     
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  3. diver6

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    That's just bull shit people just have to play the race card to create controversy, Its just a matter of personal taste nothing to do with being racist. We are all the same and everybody is attracted to somebody for a reason, just because they have there own taste or desires is what makes us unique. I wish the race deal would end.
     
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  4. 1012469

    1012469 Guest

    man, what a bold move making that kind of accusation out of nowhere.

    reminds me of something i heard on my commute a couple of weeks ago.
    A Very Offensive Rom-Com
     
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  5. 693987

    693987 Guest

    As you describe it, OP, no. That isn't racist to me. There are a lot of people who fetishize races and who do exclude people in racist ways, though. A lot.

    Edited to add: Not at the OP, but it's amazing how many people who wish the "race deal" would end are white. I deal with and have dealt with racism my entire life as a person of color. Even in a heavily left leaning, liberal region. Don't even get me started on what I've dealt with when I'm not somewhere that leans hard towards liberal. So, must be nice to just wish it would end...
     
  6. ItsAll4Kim

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    I wouldn't waste any time or thought on such ignorance.
     
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  7. WilliamG

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    As a white (though I prefer to think worldly) guy there is a common thing: Sometimes our circle of friends leads us to the relationships we make. 90% of my older friends never dated black men/women. But, back in the eighties I was playing in a few bands in LA. Not famous but fun. While in those bands, I made friends with other musicians of color. A drummer (black) of a band I was in had a sister who came to some rehearsals and a few gigs. One night after a gig we hit if off. Long story short: Within minutes of getting alone and being naked - we both kind of giggled out loud that this was was "exotic" and exciting in a way. Neither of us had been with another race. We'd crossed over. It was a great time for both us. That said, after a few weeks we both moved apart but stayed connected as great friends (went to her wedding). Had I not been in bands, I don't think the opportunity would have happened as easily.
     
  8. Gj816

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    He definitely sounds like a loose cannon and perhaps he inwardly has the hots for you.

    I've never had sex with a black man/ woman simply because the opportunity has never presented itself.

    I'd chalk it up to his fantasy and move on. You can't fix stupid.
     
  9. CalifornianSTUD

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    Sociologically speaking, racism is a verb, not a noun. That means it is an action, not a belief system per se. For example, racism would be refusing service based on skin color, or hurting someone because they are a different race. It is a racist act. People can like or hate whomever they want, even if it is based on race, but if they keep their feelings to themselves it doesn’t hurt anyone, it’s when they begin to act on their ridiculous beliefs when there is a real problem.
     
  10. 916416

    916416 Guest

    In response to your edit: I was going to leave that part alone, but you hit the nail on the head. Do we all wish racism would go away? Of course. Does speaking about race lead to racism? Not at all & it never will.

    I have experienced things similar to what you’re describing.
     
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  11. 916416

    916416 Guest

    This is a great example of how it happens in real life nothing to and no big deal. If you’re into the other race try it if not who cares.
     
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  12. Infernal

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    There are certain body types I don't care for, and they tend to be found in specific nationalities. It has everything to do with sexual attraction, and nothing to do with the nationality. Am I a racist because my dick doesn't respond to certain things?
     
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  13. 916416

    916416 Guest

    Nope your dick just has a type. A good dick owner provides said dick with said type.

    Be a good dick owner.
     
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  14. 693987

    693987 Guest

    Further thoughts.

    I think if a person makes and lives by a sweeping generalization that they don't find the entirety of x race unattractive... It's racist. It is a pretty unpopular opinion, but I haven't yet encountered anyone who fits that mentality whose behavior has given me reason to change that opinion. And, as should be fairly clear by what I wrote, it's just my opinion. Not any more superior or inferior to anyone else's opinion.

    Not having slept with someone of a particular demographic isn't racist. The social circles I move through don't have every demographic in them. Specifically chasing down a person of a particular demographic just so I can fuck them isn't "good" in my eyes either. Why would I be doing it? Just to basically check a box off on a checklist? Because I believe in stereotypes that I expect them to fulfill? Given how often I deal with people turning my ethnic background into some bullshit fetish, I am keenly aware of and strenuously avoid exotifying/fetishizing anyone for the demographics they belong to. People are people.
     
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  15. AlteredEgo

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    Hello (BF)
    I would have dated more white men, but at some point learned a preference for keeping those relationships casual. I had a white boyfriend for several years until a few years ago. That relationship started about the same time I decided not to accept a marriage proposal from a different white man. I have never thought about it before, but other than my high school sweetheart, whom I never took seriously (I mean, it was high school) I never exclusively dated any men I'd consider white. Technically, I married a man who identifies as a white Hispanic, but I am shocked every time he writes it down in a form. To me, Puerto Ricans are people of color. Even though his mother is racist and hates black people, except her one black friend so she can say she has one. Thinking about it though, only two men I considered white were ever loved in that way, and given consideration for marriage and childrearing. What I learned was that it could take long years to determine that there were quietly held beliefs and traditions that I see as disqualifications for being appropriate to raise a non-white family. I don't want to waste years, so I haven't given that kind of consideration to any other white men. The white men I dated we're good men. But if we'd gotten pregnant, they'd have proven to be inappropriate choices to father people bronzed by my genetic contribution. That is not why I turned down marriage to the first one, but it is why I left the latter.

    The relationship taught me some red flags that could save me time in the future. Lots of white people find new ways to suggest that I'm not too black, or don't seem black, and therefore am acceptable to be in white company. Black people do this with me too, but that's for another discussion.

    "You don't sound black."
    "You don't dress black."
    "You're like, for sure, basically white."

    Really? I ask because, no one in my family has identified as white in well over a century, not even the ones who didn't look like they could possibly be black. I grew up steeping in Afro-caribbean culture. I grew up with the oral history of my family going all the way back to slave days. My facial features are undeniably African. I can only be me. So, I look, behave, and sound like a black woman of my age and experiences. I have no knowledge of how, nor the desire to do otherwise.

    I can't be family with a man who thinks clear diction and certain fashions belong to white people. I can't be in love with a man who isn't even as sharp as I am, who absolutely has never been my intellectual equal but who believes intelligence like mine is hard to find among people of color, especially black people. No, intelligence quite like mine is uncommon, period. (Not rare, just uncommon.) I'm not going to put up with a man who uses othering language right off the bat. "Do you like white guys?" Fuck right off. Maybe I do, but I do not like you. This usually comes out of my mouth as a more diplomatic, "No. I like men. Period."

    I don't want to see years wasted on some dude again. So, I'm still willing to date white men, but I doubt I will. I have too many reservations, and there are too many things that only time can prove. I'm likely to keep it casual. While I do like pretty, translucent skin, or sun-kissed bronze skin, or ruddy, peach skin, I'm far more attracted to very dark skin, anyway. It's just so sexy to me.
     
    #15 AlteredEgo, May 12, 2019
    Last edited: May 12, 2019
  16. 916416

    916416 Guest

    @AlteredEgo, you’ve always had a way with words. Thank you for that contribution. I haven’t slept all night so I’m going to reply to you and to @Fade wonderful post once I get some sleep.

    Fantastic post.
     
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  17. sodominsane

    sodominsane Legendary Member

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    I kinda of think the same way.....of someone say I'm just not attracted to x race.....i think.....really....so in a world with millions of people of x race.....you find not a single one attractive...or comparable

    Yeah that's probably racist.....maybe not Klan or. New black panther party racist....but at least a bit
     
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  18. meningreentights

    meningreentights Superior Member

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    I can find members of other races super attractive but it doesn't mean I want to have sex with them or be married to them. We all have our own preferences. I prefer tall women who have poise, elegance, and charm. A kind, gracious heart goes a long way.
    Who could not see that she is beautiful?
    [​IMG]
     
  19. sodominsane

    sodominsane Legendary Member

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    I don't want to be argumentative.....but it takes all kinds....I'm totally not into the extremely underweight highly airbrushed look that the model industry tells us we are supposed to drool over....tbh I find women on the site hotter....give me AE pretty face, great smile and titties any day.....shit I did a ton of time in Africa....there are hotter bodyed dreadlocked cuties all over here home country

    BUT WHO IS HOT OR NOT IS NOT POINT.....it's the idea that you can't find anyone from that group in millions.....that's a bit odd to me

    I mean personally I get that there are pretended in dating fucking and relationships.....for example I eat almost carniverouslly.....so that chances of find a bride from a Hindu (vegetarian) country of India.....less than optional.....but inna country of a billion....there got to be someone.....so if I say...in would absolutely both days an indian....in my opinion....a bit racist
     
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  20. meningreentights

    meningreentights Superior Member

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    That isn't a highly airbrushed photo. It is a younger Iman who is still beautiful in her 60's.
    We get all the stuff about I think all white people or whatever race are ugly. I was expressing my own opinion.
    People who find whole races ugly have some mental block.
     
    Gj816 likes this.
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