I had a great summer, it is the best summer I never had. I had my first real sex affair with a man (that was fun). Then I slep with the guy that turn me on since I was 10 years old (deception). Then I felt in love... I didn't want it, because I knew I was leaving my country and it wouldn't end good. But it happen and there is nothing I can do about that.
This man is older then me, I know him for a long time, he was a friend of the family. I never knew he was ''bisexual''. Anyway, we had a secret relation and we both felt in love with each other. No one knew (my father would have killed me). And ending this relation was very painfull, but I'm strong and I will get over it.
Now I study. In the ''world'' of the carreer I want to do (fallowing my father step) there is no such thing as hommosexuality. I mean there is like anywhere else, but if I want to be succesfull at it, it is not the path I should fallow. I should get married and have the perfect picture. I know that for a long time, that is why I wanted to have a good summer, and I did.
Now I will study and concentrate in my work, before my pleasure. And yes, I will get married in few years and live a more proper life. Although I want a woman who will know who I am, I dont want to hide anything. That doesn't mean that I will not have sex with another man, it just mean that in life, pleasure have to come in second place...
Thank you for reading me, and thank you to have been so helpfull with advise to me and in my first experiences. And a special thanks to Nick (big kisses). And thanks also for all the compliments you have gaving me, it gave me better insurance in me, because I felt fine physicaly, but not beautifull like what we expect beauty to be, but I'm much more confident with me and my body now.
I will not be present here as before, because like the title of this post says, I will be busy with school.
Oli
This man is older then me, I know him for a long time, he was a friend of the family. I never knew he was ''bisexual''. Anyway, we had a secret relation and we both felt in love with each other. No one knew (my father would have killed me). And ending this relation was very painfull, but I'm strong and I will get over it.
Now I study. In the ''world'' of the carreer I want to do (fallowing my father step) there is no such thing as hommosexuality. I mean there is like anywhere else, but if I want to be succesfull at it, it is not the path I should fallow. I should get married and have the perfect picture. I know that for a long time, that is why I wanted to have a good summer, and I did.
Now I will study and concentrate in my work, before my pleasure. And yes, I will get married in few years and live a more proper life. Although I want a woman who will know who I am, I dont want to hide anything. That doesn't mean that I will not have sex with another man, it just mean that in life, pleasure have to come in second place...
Thank you for reading me, and thank you to have been so helpfull with advise to me and in my first experiences. And a special thanks to Nick (big kisses). And thanks also for all the compliments you have gaving me, it gave me better insurance in me, because I felt fine physicaly, but not beautifull like what we expect beauty to be, but I'm much more confident with me and my body now.
I will not be present here as before, because like the title of this post says, I will be busy with school.
Oli
