Politics, for the politician

DC_DEEP

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Once there was a U.S. congressman who was walking down the street one day when he was tragically hit by a truck and killed. His soul arrived in heaven and was met by St. Peter at the entrance.

''Welcome to heaven,'' says St. Peter. ' 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you.''

''No problem, just let me in,'' said the man.

''Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from Higher Up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.''

''Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,'' said the congressman.

''I'm sorry but we have our rules.''

And with that, St. Peter escorted him to the elevator and he went down, down, down to hell. The doors opened and he found himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance was a clubhouse and standing in front of it were all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone was very happy and in evening dress. They ran to greet him, shook his hand, and reminisced about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They played a friendly game of golf and then dined on lobster, caviar, and champagne.

Also present was the devil, who really was a very friendly guy who had a good time dancing and telling jokes. They were having such a good time that before he r ealized it, it was time to go. Everyone gave him a hearty farewell and waved while the elevator rose.

The elevator went up, up, up and the door reopened on heaven where St. Peter was waiting for him. ''Now it's time to visit heaven.''

So, 24 hours passed with the legislator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They had a good time and, before he realized it, the 24 hours had gone by and St. Peter returned.

''Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.''

The congressman reflected for a minute, then the he answered: ''Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.''

So St. Peter escorted him to the elevator and he went down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator opened and he was in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He saw all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash fell from above.

The devil came over to him and put his arm around his shoulder. ''I don't understand,'' stammered the congressman. ''The other day I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time . Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends all look miserable. What happened?''

The devil looked at him, smiled and said, ''The other day we were campaigning...... Today you voted.''
 

MASSIVEPKGO_CHUCK

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DC_DEEP said:
Once there was a U.S. congressman who was walking down the street one day when he was tragically hit by a truck and killed. His soul arrived in heaven and was met by St. Peter at the entrance.

''Welcome to heaven,'' says St. Peter. ' 'Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you.''

''No problem, just let me in,'' said the man.

''Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from Higher Up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in hell and one in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.''

''Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,'' said the congressman.

''I'm sorry but we have our rules.''

And with that, St. Peter escorted him to the elevator and he went down, down, down to hell. The doors opened and he found himself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance was a clubhouse and standing in front of it were all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him.

Everyone was very happy and in evening dress. They ran to greet him, shook his hand, and reminisced about the good times they had while getting rich at expense of the people. They played a friendly game of golf and then dined on lobster, caviar, and champagne.

Also present was the devil, who really was a very friendly guy who had a good time dancing and telling jokes. They were having such a good time that before he r ealized it, it was time to go. Everyone gave him a hearty farewell and waved while the elevator rose.

The elevator went up, up, up and the door reopened on heaven where St. Peter was waiting for him. ''Now it's time to visit heaven.''

So, 24 hours passed with the legislator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They had a good time and, before he realized it, the 24 hours had gone by and St. Peter returned.

''Well, then, you've spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.''

The congressman reflected for a minute, then the he answered: ''Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.''

So St. Peter escorted him to the elevator and he went down, down, down to hell. Now the doors of the elevator opened and he was in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He saw all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash fell from above.

The devil came over to him and put his arm around his shoulder. ''I don't understand,'' stammered the congressman. ''The other day I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time . Now there's just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends all look miserable. What happened?''

The devil looked at him, smiled and said, ''The other day we were campaigning...... Today you voted.''

Oh, snap! Sweet revenge!Good one there, DC!:biggrin1: