[poll] can sexual orientation change?

Can sexual orientation change?

  • Yes

  • No


Results are only viewable after voting.

needtonut

Legendary Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Nov 19, 2007
Posts
314
Media
6
Likes
1,383
Points
498
Location
Dallas (Texas, United States)
Verification
View
Sexuality
No Response
Gender
Male
No, orientation does not change. I know many would disagree but here are my thoughts. You are what you are. Many people go through life denying their orientation. Some eventually accept it but to me, this is not change. Some feel the need to claim that religious experiences changed them from gay to straight... I file this under D for Denial. Can gay people have straight sex? Can straight people have gay sex? Definitely, but it doesn't change their orientation. In other words, you can be gay and live the straight lifestyle if you're determined enough but life would be much easier if everyone were simply honest. You might irritate others' expectations of you but in the long run you'd be a much more fulfilled human being.
 

handcuffsfan4

Admired Member
Joined
Jan 10, 2006
Posts
550
Media
14
Likes
771
Points
248
Location
Arcata (California, United States)
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
Gender
Male
I believe that one can change, just as everything else in the universe can change. As a rock can seem stagnant in time, it also changes through erosion by being eroded or can be combined with others to become a larger rock. I'm not saying a gay man can all of a sudden become straight, but can meet a girl he is attracted to and possibly become bi. Or a man can obtain a foot fetish , or the like, through different sexual activities through the his life. Though if one views their own sexuality as a fixed construct, then it probably is. We are all different and see ourselves as such. So a person who dosnt have such fixed feelings about themselves can change who they are. So if I'm a male who only likes sex between a man and a woman and believes that this is the only good type of sexuality, I'm more than likely not going to ever want to try male on male sexua and will be fixed in my sexuality. On the other hand if I was a male who only had sex with women, though was more open to new sexual opportunities, I may learn from the right male to appreciate and enjoy gay sex. One could say that this male was always bi but was in denile, but some could also say that gays are bi but also in denile. I personally believe that these labels fix people into certain categories making individuals less likely to stray into others, but not many actually fit 100%. just as not all women fit into the gender category of what a woman is, as some enjoy dressing more like men, wish to be men, or just wish to be themselves. Again I don't believe one can become 100% straight from being 100% gay overnight, but as a decorator crab changes its appearance through acquiring different objects, a person can also change itself through different life experiences if they are open to the possibility.
 
7

798686

Guest
I'm going with no.

Fair amount of variation within your basic sexual preference - but complete turnaround? No. Not seen anything to convince me this is really possible.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Hatt_101

Hatt_101

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Posts
4,453
Media
72
Likes
8,271
Points
393
Location
Ontario (Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
No it cant not change. some people my be in the closet or not willing to admit their true nature but you are born with your sexuality. both there videos onision made pretty much sums it up. if sexuality was a choice whats to stop those extremest Christian groups from changing gay men straight? there are numerous sexuality and it isnt a choice to just pick one.


 
3

328982

Guest
As the article below points out, a growing body of research indicates that for some people, sexual attractions can and do change over time. But that's not an endorsement of 'reparative therapy,' nor is it a bad thing for the LGBT movement...

http://www.advocate.com/health/love-and-sex/2014/02/11/exploring-umbrella-bisexuality-and-fluidity

Some research studies/abstracts:
http://www.midus.wisc.edu/findings/pdfs/1153.pdf
http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0277953602001612
http://psycnet.apa.org/journals/dev/44/1/5/
 

Lee_M

Legendary Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Jun 2, 2016
Posts
1,257
Media
10
Likes
1,742
Points
358
Location
Sydney NSW, Australia
Verification
View
Sexuality
90% Straight, 10% Gay
Gender
Female
I would say no, but only on the terms that i don't think anyone is born with a specific orientation. Unlike eye colour which is set in stone, who and what you like is purely subjective. Kind of like food, for example one day you like seafood, but then for whatever reason your tastes change and you no longer like seafood.

I think it is more about what you like, and what you are willing to accept rather than a particular orientation.
 
3

328982

Guest
Two years ago I would have said no. However (and possibly through medication) I am increasingly attracted to men, or the possibility of a relationship with a man. Now I just keep an open mind.
And vice versa, I'm much more attracted now to women. That's not due to any external influence, denial or whatever - after all I've been gay all this time, who cares - it's an internal shift. I have friends who were married to women who are now married to men, monogamously on both counts. Most people don't but some people do change their orientation IMO.
 

bigbull29

Worshipped Member
Joined
Apr 24, 2006
Posts
7,577
Media
52
Likes
14,090
Points
343
Location
State College (Pennsylvania, United States)
Sexuality
Pansexual
Gender
Male
No it cant not change. some people my be in the closet or not willing to admit their true nature but you are born with your sexuality. both there videos onision made pretty much sums it up. if sexuality was a choice whats to stop those extremest Christian groups from changing gay men straight? there are numerous sexuality and it isnt a choice to just pick one.


Sorry, but you're referring to religion repressing someone's sexual orientation, which is being forced upon them. Forced change doesn't work in the least. However, people's sexuality can ever naturally change over time, irrespective of culture, religion or whatever is taboo is strongly in place in a given society. I agree that many people will not evolve that much sexually over time, but some will. Why not? Three reasons: sexual taboos, unwilling to explore, or simply just can't like anything but vanilla.

I've seen people evolve greatly over time, whether it be personality, etc. A person's sexuality is no different
 

Hatt_101

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Posts
4,453
Media
72
Likes
8,271
Points
393
Location
Ontario (Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
And vice versa, I'm much more attracted now to women. That's not due to any external influence, denial or whatever - after all I've been gay all this time, who cares - it's an internal shift. I have friends who were married to women who are now married to men, monogamously on both counts. Most people don't but some people do change their orientation IMO.
I Can agree to disagree. Like he's said in the video why it's more likely for a gay man to have been married and then realize he's not straight is because society presents a relationship between a man and a woman as the norm and as the goal in life.

If you're told from early on in life to find a good woman to settle down with and make a family obviously that's what's you will think you're supposed to do. Even if you're not straight.

I am straight but I didn't one day decide I was straight it's just the way I am. Realization of somthing isn't changing so if you eventually came to the realization that you are what ever orientation that doesn't mean your sexuality changed you just realized what you really are.

Can anyone actually say that one day they decided to be straight , gay , bi , pan or anything else? Because again like onision said in the videos if you can just decide why would anyone decide to be anything other than straight when all other orientations suffer from persecution and discrimination. If it were a choice they could just choose the one that would make life easiest for them.

Regardless it's a pretty split poll really thought it would be more one sided than it is.
 
6

622675

Guest
Sorry, but you're referring to religion repressing someone's sexual orientation, which is being forced upon them. Forced change doesn't work in the least. However, people's sexuality can ever naturally change over time, irrespective of culture, religion or whatever is taboo is strongly in place in a given society. I agree that many people will not evolve that much sexually over time, but some will. Why not? Three reasons: sexual taboos, unwilling to explore, or simply just can't like anything but vanilla.

I've seen people evolve greatly over time, whether it be personality, etc. A person's sexuality is no different


Bull and H, is it possible you are both correct. Research supports the idea that an individual is born with a (generally fixed) scope of sexual attraction. For some the focus of this attraction is narrow, for others it more inclusive. Both an individual’s early life (nurture) and physical development (nature) serve to sharpen sexual interest within the scope one is born with.

--As an individual matures (experiences life) they may have the interest and freedom to explore their scope of sexual attraction.

--As they explore it may appear that they are changing their sexual interest.

--If they do not explore because of negative aspects in their culture, issues with self-image, opportunity, or just lack of desire, then they appear to be more fixed.

The point is that the individual’s scope does not change; rather it is how the individual engages his/her generally fixed spectrum of sexual interest that appears to show change.

So Hatt_101, I agree with you position that an individual is born with a (generally fixed) scope of sexual interest. And bigbull29, I agree that external forces and the lack of opportunity often suppress the individual’s freedom to know their unique nature.

The problem with what we have seen as sexual “reparative” programs is their objective has been designed to force change. They haven’t understood the nature of human sexual interest nor have they moved beyond using Gestapo tactics for attacking the individual.

The only change strategy that will work is when the individual is encouraged to explore his/her sexual interest and choose what fits them best. This is what Abraham Maslow refers to as self-actualization.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Hatt_101
3

328982

Guest
Research supports the idea that an individual is born with a (generally fixed) scope of sexual attraction
Does it? What research? It seems implausible that a newborn baby would come into the world with an innate/fixed sexual orientation or 'scope of sexual attraction'. I don't see how that could be demonstrated or proved. This reads like an unproven premise.
 
3

328982

Guest
I am straight but I didn't one day decide I was straight it's just the way I am. Realization of somthing isn't changing so if you eventually came to the realization that you are what ever orientation that doesn't mean your sexuality changed you just realized what you really are.
I don't think it's about sudden realisations, choices or decisions. If or when change happens, it's more likely to be over a period of time, in response to new life experiences perhaps?
 
  • Like
Reactions: Hatt_101

Hatt_101

Superior Member
Verified
Gold
Joined
Sep 3, 2010
Posts
4,453
Media
72
Likes
8,271
Points
393
Location
Ontario (Canada)
Verification
View
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Male
I don't think it's about sudden realisations, choices or decisions. If or when change happens, it's more likely to be over a period of time, in response to new life experiences perhaps?
What is to differentiate that from self realization? People don't generally figure things out right away so someone coming to a conclusion on theirs sexuality of a period of time wouldn't be a change it would just be an actualization of somthing they were all along.

If you could change even if it was slowly over time I'm sure more people would do it because to why suffer as somthing that is persecuted against like being gay when in they could try over years to become straight to not feel that anymore? I'm sure no one would choose to have other hate them.

Take that YouTube video of the guy in the church that was saying he's "not gay no more" if what ever that church did to him actually worked, which I don't think most people believe , what's to stop them form say opening up some type reform school for gay men and women. And that would just escalate from there.

I definitely understand what you are saying but I do not think that, that would be a change in orientation but just an actualization of somthing that was always there.
 

handcuffsfan4

Admired Member
Joined
Jan 10, 2006
Posts
550
Media
14
Likes
771
Points
248
Location
Arcata (California, United States)
Sexuality
50% Straight, 50% Gay
Gender
Male
What is to differentiate that from self realization? People don't generally figure things out right away so someone coming to a conclusion on theirs sexuality of a period of time wouldn't be a change it would just be an actualization of somthing they were all along.

If you could change even if it was slowly over time I'm sure more people would do it because to why suffer as somthing that is persecuted against like being gay when in they could try over years to become straight to not feel that anymore? I'm sure no one would choose to have other hate them.

Take that YouTube video of the guy in the church that was saying he's "not gay no more" if what ever that church did to him actually worked, which I don't think most people believe , what's to stop them form say opening up some type reform school for gay men and women. And that would just escalate from there.

I definitely understand what you are saying but I do not think that, that would be a change in orientation but just an actualization of somthing that was always there.
But what if the self actualization came after a change? What I didn't like about that YouTube guy is that he groups men and women ands separate categories. I'm not attracted to every single woman and I'm sure gays aren't attracted to every guy. What is to say that a gay guy can't find a woman that he is attracted to? He may realize he likes certain women and he never realized it till a certain event happened? He may have been bi all along but never realized it till the right woman came along. It may also stem from an emotional issue that got him closers to a woman and he realized that it felt nice. This happened to my uncle who is bi polar. He was with a man who cared for him and after they broke up, he married a woman.