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Porn for New Moms!

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by petite, May 24, 2010.

  1. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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  2. ManlyBanisters

    ManlyBanisters Well-Known Member

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    Jaysus - are other women really that sad?

    What turned me on before and after having a baby did not change. Looking at a bloke in a white vest cuddling a baby does nothing for me. There's a baby in the picture, for God's sake - that's not porn! It maybe sweet. the guy may be attractive but there's a FUCKING BABY IN THE PICTURE!!!

    NOT PORN! NOT PORN! NOT PORN!
     
  3. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    :wink:


    LOL! It's a follow-up to the original Porn for Women that depicts hunks cleaning a home and folding clothes. It's disappointing because they're fully clothed. It would be perfect if they were all in semi-transparent white boxer-briefs.
     
  4. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

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    Just reinforces stereotypes though, doesnt it?

    If someone bought that, id have to consider them quite sad. Its funny for the two seconds it took for the the page to load then i saw what it was.
     
  5. 798686

    798686 Guest

    I dunno - I kinda get what she means. Sort of hot to see the person you fancy in domestic situations. Not that having a baby in a pic is hot - just the fact you see a different side to your partner.

    Like me enjoying pics of hot women doing the ironing or whatever. Yes it's a stereotype, but it still gets ppl going, so why not? :)

    Wouldn't post any links to baby pics tho on here - against ToS.
     
  6. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    So women who want a hunky guy who will change poopy diapers and do the housework is sad? I don't get what's sad about that. That's what I want! I sure hope TheBoyfriend will do those things when we get married. I'm still working on getting the housework part down. :rolleyes:

    They're just intended as jokes, but it's not so off the mark. I think most women don't just want a hunk in the bedroom. They want a hunk who participates in all areas of her life, including all the unglamorous ones.
     
    #6 petite, May 24, 2010
    Last edited: May 24, 2010
  7. ManlyBanisters

    ManlyBanisters Well-Known Member

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    I'm not saying it isn't an attractive idea* - I'm saying it's not porn.

    * The random 'fit' bloke doing chores and tending to baby isn't particularly attractive to me but maybe that's because I have a man who is more of a domestic goddess than I am. I don't have to fantasize about it, I already have it. And yes, I said goddess. All man, but also a domestic goddess. Good job he's a lesbian! :smile:
     
  8. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    True! I wouldn't mind a porn version of the first one with newd men! Not at all!

    I envy you so much! I think I have fantasies like that.

    TheBoyfriend has many wonderful traits, like his giant heart and his perfect bubble butt, but he is not a domestic goddess!

    He suffers from a very peculiar malady that causes him to be totally incompetent within the walls of his own house. He is capable of keeping track of 1,000 details per day when it comes to his work, but he still can't remember which of his 5 drawers contains his pants. For some reason, rather than opening and closing each drawer to find them, he yells my name and waits for me to arrive so I can tell him which drawer they're in! He does the same thing when he's looking for the mayonnaise (or anything else) inside the refrigerator. I think he's finally figured where he's supposed to put his own mugs in his own cabinets when he empties the dishwasher.

    Someday I plan on teaching how to use a hanger. :tongue:
     
  9. Drifterwood

    Gold Member

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    I guess if the new Mom is into scat then she is going to have a wild time.
     
  10. HiddenLacey

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    Lol when I first looked at this I didn't understand. But then I really started thinking about it. If I had a baby and their father was standing there at 3am shirtless, hair mussed feeding them or rocking them to sleep.... I could be turned on by this, yes indeed :) I would think that "daddy" things would turn me on. I don't know that I'd be ripping my clothes off if I saw him changing a diaper lol. I looked at both of the books. Not for me. Seeing my man cleaning does not turn me on. Once again if he's all sleepy in boxer's standing in the kitchen making his coffee or whatever that in itself would be sexy, not the fact that he's making coffee. I thought this was cute!

    Petite TheBoyfriend and myguy seem to have the same affliction... I think its called being a man. He asks me where everything is. He swears up and down that I move things (which I do lol) someone has to clean right? Sometimes I think if I wasn't here he would never put clothes up he would wear whatever's in the dryer and when it was empty wash and dry and wear again :) But I do love him!!!!
     
    #10 HiddenLacey, May 24, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: May 24, 2010
  11. D_Wally Walnuts

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    ^This. I clean house better than most.
     
  12. Not_Punny

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    It's tongue in cheek -- they're using the word "porn" loosely. The whole thing is based on the fact that the number one thing a new mom needs is some help around the house and some rest.

    Don't know about anyone else, but I find it SEXY to see a man with biceps doing housework!
     
  13. 798686

    798686 Guest

    We need to do a book of 'Puns for New Mums', too. :biggrin1:
     
  14. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    You've got it! A woman delirious from sleeping only two hours at a time from newborn feeding schedules, what's her best fantasy going to be?
     
  15. ManlyBanisters

    ManlyBanisters Well-Known Member

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    In the first month? - I couldn't have given a fuck what the person helping me looked like.

    After that?

    A good hard fuck that didn't put too much strain on my caesarean scar.

    But maybe that's just me.

    I didn't get that by the way - but it's what I wanted.
     
  16. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    Really? TheBF showed me the first one, the one with the guys cleaning the house and I laughed hysterically. I loved it! :tongue:

    I guess the longer you live with someone who is generally not very domestic and expects you to do all of it, the sexier the idea of your partner participating becomes because I genuinely think I'd be turned on if TheBoyfriend surprised me and cleaned the house without me having to nag him. Seriously.

    I call it being a "guy." TheBoyfriend is more of a guy than any man I've ever been in a LTR with. He's incapable of finding something that's right in front of him until he's called my name and waited for me to arrive, he never uses a hamper, he's willing to fix any electronics, but he can't figure out how to sort the laundry before washing so he's afraid to try.

    I've actually dated a few very neat and tidy men, but most are not. One of my live-in boyfriends actually did all the cooking and cleaning. He didn't pay for anything, but I was happy with how well he kept the house! I was very happy with that. I love it.
     
    #16 petite, May 24, 2010
    Last edited: May 24, 2010
  17. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    It would help if women like me hadn't had the repeated personal experience of living with heterosexual men who didn't do any housework. Then it would cease to be funny because it wouldn't strike a cord of desire in women like me with a long series of ex-boyfriend's who were selectively incompetent about doing housework.

    I have to say, those men who did keep a clean house, you have no idea how much I appreciated that! No idea!

    So true! I think it's hot to see your partner actually take part in the hard and un-fun parts of being together. Sort of like how making sure that your partner is properly covered by health insurance and making sure her brakes are in perfect working order is sort of romantic because it shows how much you care.

    True!

    Yuck!

    I'm sure the women you date love that!

    That is the implied message of the book series. "This is what women want."

    Not_Punny could definitely write one!

    I'll tell you what I think in 2011, but I suspect that a hot dude can make any situation better. It's just a suspicion I have... I'd love the opportunity to test that theory out.
     
    #17 petite, May 24, 2010
    Last edited: May 24, 2010
  18. ManlyBanisters

    ManlyBanisters Well-Known Member

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    Yeah? I would have said the same thing before I experienced the total and utter hormone crash & burn hangover that is "post-partumnity".

    YMMV, of course but good luck with that :wink:
     
  19. HiddenLacey

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    Yep word for word the same:biggrin1: Mine can rebuild or remake or fix anything the few times he's tried to load the dishwasher everythings in wrong or if he washes clothes he messes them up. Better yet he has vaccuumed the kitchen floor before... which just throws stuff everywhere... I do love him though I find most of it funny. Sometimes I get my panties in a wad and throw a small tantrum but for the most part I just fix whatever he did and say thank you honey for helping. He can't help it! Plus I'm always breaking something around the house or if I have to put something together it takes me forever, we work out good together in a lot of ways! Anyway back to your book it's cute but I don't think I would read it and my guy would NOT find it very funny. It think it would hurt his feelings :(
     
    #19 HiddenLacey, May 24, 2010
    Last edited by a moderator: May 24, 2010
  20. petite

    petite Well-Known Member

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    That's hilarious! Aw, yeah you shouldn't hurt his feelings, especially if he tries. Trying matters a lot. TheBF is actually the one who showed me those books, so I really don't think they hurt his feelings. :biggrin1:

    TheBF has promised to try harder. I've let TheBF get away with the "I don't understand how to do housework, so I just can't do it" act for a while now, but that has to end now that I'm having his child. We won't have time for that, or at least I won't have time to do it all by myself. I need a hand. Change is very painful.

    I told TheBF about your guy vacuuming the kitchen and he said, "You know, I bet that would work!" so I guess great minds think alike. :tongue:
     
    #20 petite, May 24, 2010
    Last edited: May 24, 2010
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