*blink*
back handing an idea is not the same as back handing the person expressing an already back-handed idea.
the lady in questions knows she's got some no-go areas. she also knows what forms of sexual expression she's friendly with. if her porn taste were approaching pathological, express some concern. proceed with caution.
what's so awful about cfnm porn? orgasm denial is standard kink... is edging with a swirl of domination. is cfmn/orgasm denial rape porn? *asking cuz i don't know, least not from dude perspective.* i know heaps of folks with histories of sexual trauma using sexual role play to reclaim a feeling of power/purpose. actual rape = bad. power exchange all consensual like = good.
Nothing is wrong with CFNM, femdom, BDSM, et cetera. What could be problematic is if she finds herself fascinated or enthralled with it because of her own past trauma. In a way, it could prevent her from "getting over" that trauma internally.
Or not.
That's why I said
may.
self medicating? she's not avoiding sexual contact/relationships.. porn isn't her "instead of" is something she's enjoying with her partner. she doesn't wanna watch a woman treated like a fuck sleeve with a built in voice chip. kinda healthy if ya ask me. :shrug:
But she seems like she may want to watch porn that treats a man like a piece of filth. Again, it's fine if that's what gets her off. I'm not saying he should stop her.
But if they're watching porn together, don't they both get a say? Seems like she's enjoying x-art and such as well. What's the harm in going down that route instead?
And I'm not saying it's at all a big deal. My original statement was a quick off-hand remark that got blown out of proportion, not some kind of psychoanalysis of her. I have no idea what her mental state is.
But if you're going down the path of violent/dom/whatever with a rape victim, it can have fairly obvious risks, can't it? I just don't understand why suggesting that got negative responses. Misunderstanding? Or am I actually a complete misogynist but never knew it?
eta: i was posting while ya was posting.
urm, which smiley is the dickish smiley.. i always use :13: cuz it looks so damn smug
oh.. the eyeroll... nevermind.
eta: asking cuz i'm still under the impression that Mr. Guy works with brains/behavior.
:stupid2:
(I feel bad posting that smiley, actually.)