Possibly the most amazing night of my life

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by roosevelt, Dec 19, 2006.

  1. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    Alright, well I've been offline for about 6 weeks now. There where two reasons for my absensce. The first was that I've been very busy with my Christmas work, the second (and currently more pertinent) is that I've been seeing a young lady since the begining of october, and so between my 12 hour days with the business, and the evenings with my girlfriend, I didn't have time for computer work. In that time I've had a few interesting experiences, one in particular I'd love to share:

    About 7pm one saturday evening, I'd just arrived at my girl's appartment, when her phone rang. It was her sister who wanted to know if we wanted to meet her and her girlfriend for dinner. Yes, that's girlfriend, her sister is a lesbian. (for those of you hoping to read later and find some story of me having sex with both of them, you can stop reading now) Neither of us had eaten, and we'd both had long days, so we figured "why not?" and we worked out the arrangements of where to meet and when.

    About 8pm we met the girls at the thai restaurant, and we all ordered drinks and our meals. The two girls ocross the table from us ordered wine to drink, and we stuck with non-alchoholic beverages. They mentioned that the sister's band was playing that night at a conference's open mic night, and wondered if we wanted to come. We're both pretty laid back, go with the flow type people, so we figured we'd go to support the sister, and if it was terrible, we could always cut out early, make the drive back to town, and hit up the bar before heading to a party being held by a friend of mine.

    I'd never considered the dating dynamic of lesbians, and perhaps it's not across the board, but apparently, this couple payed for themselves, something I mulled over as I payed for my date's dinner (I actually enjoy paying for her dinners and such, but it was an interesting thought to me)

    Each couple drove seperately, and we arrived at the open mic night a while later, as we had to travel a ways to get there. My date and I looked at each other quisically and wondered quietly if we where supposed to be in costume as we arrived, and saw what appeared at first glance to be a costume party in progress.

    We walked into the old antebellum mansion where the conference was being held, and came to the conclusion that this was a "gay" conference. While niether of us was offended by this, I admit, it did come as a surprise to me to see a man wearing a dress with a full beard, at what I had been, untill a few seconds earlier, led to believe was a music conference.

    Thankfully, my girlfriend is as open minded as I am, so rather than shock, we both responded to the situation with ammusement, and we found a sort of quiet corner, and settled in, for what, we had already decided, would be an interesting evening.

    Our silent observation continued for a few minutes, and we discovered that many of the attendee's where females, and about half of them where dressed in men's business suits, and had mustaches painted on. also interesting was the observation that over half the men there where either wearing dresses or skirts.

    I've known a lot of openly homosexual folks in my life, and I've intereacted with them on a lot of levels, but this was the first time I'd ever found myself in a place that I was the minority, and so honestly I was intrigued to understand the way that homosexuals must feel in the settings I'm used to seeing them in.

    Open mic night began, and the MC got up and announced that this was the "Florida United Queer and Trans" conference, otherwise kbown as "F.U.Q.T."

    As the acts went on through the evening, and I heard poem after poem about how hard it was to be gay, and song after song about how all straight people hate, I couldn't help but become somewhat uneasy sitting in the chair with my girlfriend, and noticing that with every passing moment more and more people where staring at us, some inquisitively, wondering if maybe she was just a very pretty skinny man in drag, some angrily, wondering what the fuck the straight couple was doing there.

    A lot of people had seen us walk in with my date's sister, and so they where asking her what we where doing there, she told them that we where there to support her and her band, and that we where cool. As the open mic portion of the evening was over, we started conversing with the folks around us, and made some friends, but oddly enough, there where still some folks who seemed uneasy with our presence.

    I admit, that was an interesting role reversal for me, I've always seen myself as pretty open minded and accepting, but I'd never felt what it was like to be the odd one out in a group like that.

    After a little bit of dancing as the token straight couple, we decided to head out, Her sister asked us where we where going, and we told her, she aksed if she could invite some friends, we said "the more the merrier" and headed out.

    We arrived at the Irish pub about 11:30pm, and couldn't find a table inside, as it was freezing cold out. Since there was a group of us (we wheren't sure how many yet) we decided to brave the great outdoors, and simply freeze while drinking. We ended up moving several tables together to accomodate the gathering crowd.

    All told, a crowd of about a dozen of us arrived, introductions where made, and we all started talking about various topics. There where a total of 4 couples, and 4 single folks there, I however, was the only man.

    We'd barely been sitting down for 10 minutes when a drunk guy walked up, and started hitting on the girl opposite my date. His opening line was truly classic; "Hey, don't I know you?" after talking about how he was "way to smart" to be haning out with most of the folks at that bar, he proceeded to tell us about how he was accepted to duke university when he was in the 8th grade.

    I feigned interest, and mentioned that duke was a hard school to get into for most middle schoolers. most of the folks at the table smiled, he didn't get it. it was then that he had a startling revelation and turned straight to the girl on the end and said "Hey, I know how I know you... you're a lesbian right?" she smiled and nodded that she was.

    He started looking around the table, as all of the girls there simply started to smile and nod in agreement, that indeed, they where all lesbians. His gaze came to myself and my date and I said "yeah, sorry, we're the only straight people here, and she's my girlfriend, so you might want to try another table" He proceeded to try and hold a conversation with me while staring at my girlfriends chest. I informed him again that he would do better elsewhere. he left shortly after that.

    We all had a good chuckle, and proceeded back to other topics of conversation.

    Less than 10 minutes later, the drunk returned to the end of our table and says to the same girl; "Hey, don't I know you rom somewhere?" her response was to simply point at herself and say "Lesbian, remember?" his response was a dissapointed "ohhhh... yeah...." he proceeded to scan the table, where all the other girls where nodding their heads in agreement, his response being an even more dejected sounding "ooooohhhh.... yeeeahhhh...."

    His gaze came once again upon my date, at which point he uttered a much more excited "oh, yaaa!" I glared at him, and informed him once again that he wasn't going to get anything he wanted at that particular table, at which point he looked at me and said "well, if you wheren't here, your date would be going home with me." I stood, looked him straight in the eye and replied "If I wheren't here, my girlfriend would be coming home to me; I'm more inteligent than you, I'm more succesful than you, I look better than you, I'm good in bed, and I have a huge dick. So FUCK OFF!"

    He looked quite upset as he sulked off to nurse his bruised ego. I sat back down to having all the eyes of all the girls at the table fixed firmly on me, many of them looking towards my crotch. My girlfriend had what may have been the most perfect response she could have had: "Well, at least you didn't lie honey, but you're also a pretty good cook"

    We soon left the lesbians and headed to my friends party, where within 2 minutes of our appearance, I pointed out the girl, who was without a doubt, the drunkest girl at the party. (we'd been talking about "drunk radar" earlier in the evening) and sure enough, less than 20 minutes later, as the two of us sat on a chair together, the drunk girl walked up, and asked if we wanted to take her home with us to have a threesome. We politely declined, and instead simply went home ourselves, and had an amazing evening with just the two of us and some chocolate....
     
  2. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    Ha, I wrote a small book!
     
  3. jason_els

    jason_els <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    It's fun to hang out with lesbians.

    I wouldn't worry much about the discomfort thing. Gay people can be just as narrow-minded as straights, but it's kinda like a woman barging her way into a gentlemen's club. In any other circumstance they wouldn't mind. You played it well.
     
  4. Vestigial

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    Nothing like coming on the internet after a long cooling period,.. it feels like starting smoking again.


    Mate, you laid it down the line and i'm glad you had an awesome night. ;)
     
  5. JustAsking

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    Good story and very good storytelling.
     
  6. reallyhot

    Gold Member

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    Great night dude!
    Sounds like you made the best of the situation.
    Good for you!
    Sounds like you're a pretty great person, being open to accepting
    others who happen to be gay.
    It's nice to hear about the experiences of others...

    Guess I'll share my story too.
    I was new to the world of gay too, and a lesbian co worker had been hitting on a straight female friend, who asked me to join them to go out to
    the bar...I was totally unprepared for what happened...
    We were working in a city 2000 miles from home...didn't know the place.
    Turned out the lesbian took us to a gay bar!
    Men singing in dresses, etc...shocked the hell out of me too!
    The kicker was when one of the gay guys came up to me and
    lifted my shirt poked a finger in my belly button and said
    "we could fit a nice big ruby in there"...
    I turned as red as a beet!!!
    Talk about turning the tables...
    My straight co worker, never laughed so hard in her life...
    It made for many embarrasing moments at work after that!
    My coworker handled it better than I did!
    Good thing I can laugh about it now.
     
  7. roosevelt

    roosevelt New Member

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    I'm actually a little surprised anyone read all this looking back at it now!

    It was an amazing night though...
     
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