Psycho/Sociopaths

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Thirdlegproduction, Oct 31, 2011.

  1. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    So I stumbled upon this after trying to figure out the answers to a lot of unanswered questions in my last relationship.

    Most people grab the bottle or do drugs or rebound sex, I need for things to make sense to put my issues behind me.

    But seeing this list, made me think of a lot of unusual behaviour people displayed in my personal surroundings.

    Aggressive narcissism
    Glibness/superficial charm
    Grandiose sense of self-worth
    Pathological lying
    Cunning/manipulative
    Lack of remorse or guilt
    Emotionally shallow
    Callous/lack of empathy
    Failure to accept responsibility for own actions

    I'm afraid that I may be losing objectivity here, as I'm seeing psychopaths all around me now but statisticially speaking I should not have encountered this many psychopaths as only 1 to 4% of the population can be placed into this category but it feels more like 20% to me.

    A different theory for encountering so many psychopaths in my life is that I'm subconsciously drawn to them or vice versa.


    How has your experience been with psychopaths?
     
  2. Scarlet Thelema

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    Interesting, I have found exactly the same thing in my own experiences. Though I'm a genuine and honest person, it seems that I attract (mostly) superficial and self-obsessed people. Perhaps it has to do with the feedback and narcissistic supply these individuals receive when interacting with people like us. My last relationship was a very long, drawn-out one, in which I actually became blinded to his negativity, selfishness and constant manipulation - that is, until I finally escaped him.

    It seems that callousness and failure to assume personal responsibility have sadly become the norm (speaking from my own experience). Perhaps part of this is because it's easier for most people to reflect the ideals shown them on a daily basis - on TV, social media, in newspapers, and all around them - than to question everything and adopt their own personal code of ethics.

    Anyway, I've seen some mention of this concept online (that narcissism and selfishness are increasing in society). Some is here:
    Is there an epidemic of narcissism today? | Psychology Today

    This book also looks interesting, though it approaches the subject from a US-based perspective, not a global one:
    The Narcissism Epidemic: Living in the Age of Entitlement — Book
     
  3. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    It may be because of the failing economy or because this type of behaviour is rewarded, just look at wallstreet.

    I have adapted the "This is my world" behaviour as well to achieve succes in my life, but I'm very much aware of it and it is not my preferred mindset.


    I am somewhat naive as well, which attracts the psychopaths I think.
    When somebody tells an unbelievable story, I use the logic of thinking that it would be too fabricated to be a lie so it can't be one.
    People have tried to convince me they were royalty, had a twinsister nobody knew of, close to being a billionair or knew this and that celebrity.
    I mean why would you lie about things people will eventually find out is false?

    It doesn't make any sense and that's what psychopaths do, they thrive on chaos and disaster.

    Seeing as there is a certain pattern to the people I attract, I'm building a defense of some sort analyzing every sentence, every word for inconsistancies.
    And now I'm seeing psychopaths everywhere, people without remorse, manipulating with charm and pathological lying and failure to claim any form of responsibility for their actions.

    The more I learn about human behaviour and what motivates them, the more I find out they are vile creatures, at least according to my personal code of ethics.
     
  4. Bbucko

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    Not to be pedantic, but in my mind psychopath is a broad term for someone whose sense of reality is distorted by a psychosis of one form or another, while what you've described above is a perfect illustration of a sociopath.

    I know them all too well. In fact, I've been preyed on by two of them over the last six years. The first time involved a guy who fits your description perfectly, and was a classic narcissistic sociopath; it lasted six months and left me anger issues that are still not entirely resolved. The second was actually just toying with me (as he lived about five hours away) until I was warned off by someone of mutual acquaintance. He followed most of the pattern, though I still wonder to what degree he feigned his emotions: at the time they seemed quite genuine.

    Gawd knows I've made plenty of bad choices in the love life before but nothing to that extent before. Maybe it's geography (it seems most everyone in SoFla has some scheme or another); maybe it's the fact that I'm getting older (though the first one was only four years younger, the second was seventeen years younger); maybe I just give off a vibe that seems to attract them to me. I do know that I'm much more cautious than I ever used to be when it comes to extending affection, and I really don't like that.

    On the other hand, it sure beats attempting to form a meaningful and fulfilling relationship with someone incapable of such things.
     
  5. redz_rule

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    I recently came into contact with someone who ticks every item on this list. At first they seemed incredibly charming, but it was the lack of empathy that gave them away first. It was... unnerving. As soon as things didn't go their way the rest of the behaviours followed/came to light.

    Weird thing is I *knew* something wasn't quite right from the start... just couldn't put my finger on it.
     
  6. Bob Ross

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    I believe Bbucko is right; this is more in line with sociopaths rather than psychopaths although I believe that many psychologists do not discern and group everything under the blanket term of "anti-social personality disorder". It would be nice to hear from someone who works/was educated specifically in this field...

    My employment brings me into contact with politicians on a regular basis. Although most do not fit the criteria exactly (I think most people can display one or more of those attributes from time to time) I know at least two who are defined by it.

    I also have a family member who, although I admit I am biased and incapable of being truly objective, is most certainly a sociopath. Knowing them all my life I can say that it is something that is inherent and ingrained...Most children believe the world revolves around them when they are 2 years old or so, but some do not grow out of it; and only view the emotions of other people as means to a desired end.

    My advice to anyone who encounters such people is : stay away! You will not change them and there is nothing you can do that will make them regret there actions...Find some better people to spend your precious few years/decades of life with
     
    #6 Bob Ross, Oct 31, 2011
    Last edited: Oct 31, 2011
  7. vibrationzzz

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    Being in a psychotic state is somewhat different to being psychopathic. It is good in one respect that you are wanting to learn, but do not read things into peoples behaviour that are not there. My first wife was diagnosed with Manic Depression, but only after much time, anguish and hurt, it's a long story :)...She was able to hide it well and for so long being a psychiatric nurse, not even so called experts were able to recognise it.

    Liars are everywhere, when people start believing their own lies, it begins bordering on dillusionment. Thats where things start to become unstuck for them. Wish I had more time at the moment to read all of the comments.
     
    #7 vibrationzzz, Oct 31, 2011
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  8. Calboner

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    :yup: Sociopathy, or something analogous to it, is an attribute not just of individuals but of corporations, according to Joel Bakan's The Corporation, some of the contents of which are presented in this video:

    THE CORPORATION [6/23] The Pathology of Commerce - YouTube

    As for recognizing the sociopaths among us, I recommend The Sociopath Next Door by Martha Stout.
     
    #8 Calboner, Oct 31, 2011
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  9. Incocknito

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    I remember watching a documentary about serial killers a long time ago and it said that 1 in 3 Americans were a psycopath. Hope that makes you feel better.
     
    #9 Incocknito, Oct 31, 2011
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  10. Calboner

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    This is always a danger when a psychological classification gains popular currency: it gets applied so widely and on so superficial an understanding that it begins to be deprived of all meaning. Think of how people use the word "schizophrenic" when all they mean is "inconsistent," or "paranoid" when all they mean is "mistrustful" (or sometimes simply "cautious").
     
  11. Incocknito

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    Yeah I think like most statistics it was fiddled with. They broadened the category to make it more shocking.

    Still, I think there are a lot of psychopaths in America (convicted ones) but that might just be due to the higher population compared to other places.
     
  12. MarkLondon

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    I believe that most successful people in modern capitalist societies are sociopaths (at least).

    I recall reading that a guy that worked for the Rand Corporation in the 1950s and wrote influential papers on economics and organisational systems that became mainstream from the 80s onwards was later diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic. (I'll have to see if I can track that down to provide a reference.)

    When I joined a business whose motto was "Whoever has the most when they die, wins." I thought it was a joke. Sadly not.

    I did have a "relationship" with someone that had an anti-social personality disorder. I saw it pretty quickly and foolishly thought I could bring him round. He did have good reasons for his disorder but it was too deeply ingrained for him to break out of it.

    Now that I've learned to recognise such people I do my best to avoid interacting with them.
     
  13. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    After I stumbled upon the term psychopath I did quite some research on it.

    The term psychopath and sociopath are used in the same manner with the exception of nature vs nurture.

    The therm psychopath is used as a term for people who are born this way.
    The therm sociopath is used as a term for people who became this way by exterior influences like upbringing, environment, socio economic status etc.

    At least these are the descriptions given nowadays.

    I tend to believe people are born this way with no way of altering their behaviour, thus I use the term psychopath.
     
  14. Calboner

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    A friend of mine who works with biotechnology companies once said to me regarding a member of the board of one such company who had made two very bad choices in the appointment of executive officers: "He never met a sociopath he didn't like." I don't know what the incidence of sociopathy is among business executives, but it seems to be higher than in the general population.
     
  15. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    And I just spoke to another one via xtube,

    I knew he/she was using someone elses pics and called her on it then I'm getting these magnificient stories of her working for the police hunting down frauds and tracking my ip and sending the fbi all because I didnt want to show her/him my cock.

    Just wow that was a crazy conversation.
    But I enjoy talking to them online as I try to find recurring patterns and learn how to spot them early on in a safe environment that is.

    Manipulation trough charm, guilt, threats, jokes and most of all confusion.
    They do not like to be told no, they will try any means to get what they want.
     
  16. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    Research showed that in positions of power there were 4 times more socio/psychopaths then anywhere else.

    Politics and corporations are feeding grounds for these people.
     
  17. SR_Benjamin Spanklin

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    Not to be a buzz kill, but are any of you professionals/higher-educated academics in the social sciences or more specifically psychology? There is a way in which you are supposed to ANALyze DSM criteria that you can not understand until you put into practice research methodology, even then to be considered knowledgeable you would have to specialize in this area of abnormal psych.


    Not that people aren't allowed to have opinions of others, Im just saying be careful of who you start diagnosing as a sociopath.

    @_@
    ^_^
     
    #17 SR_Benjamin Spanklin, Oct 31, 2011
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  18. Thirdlegproduction

    Thirdlegproduction Formerly WhiteMonst3r
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    I put them in a box yes, but I'm not laying my opinion of people onto other people.

    I have professional experience in psychology allthough I don't hold any degrees.
    Your opinion is not worth less or more then that of a psychologist just because they have a degree, they make just as many mistakes as any other person does.
     
  19. Bob Ross

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    #19 Bob Ross, Oct 31, 2011
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  20. Calboner

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    I would be interested in learning more about that research. Is there information about it available on the Web?
     
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