Question about pain from length of penetration

[account115]

When I have sex with my girlfriend its pretty easy for me to cause her pain if Im not very careful. My dick isnt that long, around 7 inches. I also bought her a vibrator that is slightly larger than my dick, my question is if its certain that she wont be able to take the vibrator deeper than she takes me? Is causing pain equal to 'bottoming out'? For me vaginal depth is a sort of a mystery, on one side I hurt her with my 7 inches, on the other side you hear about women taking much longer penises all the way, please educate me!!

 

[lesotho]

Read wikipedia
'With arousal, the vagina lengthens rapidly to an average of about 4 in.(10 cm), but can continue to lengthen in response to pressure.[7] As the woman becomes fully aroused, the vagina tents (last ²⁄&#8323 expands in length and width, while the cervix retracts.[8] The walls of the vagina are composed of soft elastic folds of mucous membrane skin which stretch or contract (with support from pelvic muscles) to the size of the inserted penis or other object.'

So it is like penis is going 'over the top' of cervix (never entering it). This way it isn't painful. Touching cervix is pain.

 

[account115]

Read wikipedia
'With arousal, the vagina lengthens rapidly to an average of about 4 in.(10 cm), but can continue to lengthen in response to pressure.[7] As the woman becomes fully aroused, the vagina tents (last ²⁄&#8323 expands in length and width, while the cervix retracts.[8] The walls of the vagina are composed of soft elastic folds of mucous membrane skin which stretch or contract (with support from pelvic muscles) to the size of the inserted penis or other object.'

So it is like penis is going 'over the top' of cervix (never entering it). This way it isn't painful. Touching cervix is pain.

Then why do I never seem to go over it? Its like if I reach a certain depth it just hurts her.

 

[HiddenLacey]

Some women have different depths we aren't all the same just like guys have different length's. The best thing to do is make sure she's 100% aroused and ready for you before you go deep or your more likely to hurt her. And FYI sometimes an infection could cause pain.

 

[HazelGod]

And FYI sometimes an infection could cause pain.

This was my thought, too. She should talk to her gyn about it and rule out pathological issues.

 

[HiddenLacey]

This was my thought, too. She should talk to her gyn about it and rule out pathological issues.

Yeah I worked in an obgyn clinic for awhile. It depends on the pain.

For the OP....Not to be disgusting but if either you or your GF can touch her cervix and push back and forth alittle (nicely) and it hurts really bad she should double check with her dr. If its just pain when your going really deep and hitting her cervix it might just be her depth.

I am not a DR. FYI.

 

[dolfette]

bigger than 7 has always hurt me in certain positions.
the pain...it's ramming into a dead end, a bashing, bruising pain.
hitting my cervix is a sharp, yelping pain.

a toy never gets pushed in more than 5 or 6.

it's not always about arousal. women's privates vary just as much as men's.

 

[deleted356736]

But he's only 7" long, which shouldn't be a problem. I have had sex with more women than I could ever recall, and while I can easily bottom out, with full arousal that rarely happens. And when it has, as explained above, I haven't been hitting a cervix but somewhere else. In other words, no pain. The way I always have sex is to start shallow, and use penetration itself to achieve the final degree of arousal to enable me to go deeper after a while.

To me the answer is full arousal, but if she's been hurt by too much too quickly in the past, there could be some psychological issues preventing her from relaxing 100%. A bit like male psychological ED, perhaps?

 

[petite]

FYI: the cervix isn't at the end of the vagina. It's about 3-5" down the length of the vagina, depending on the woman, and the penis passes under the uterus and goes into the cul-de-sac during sex. The pouch of Douglas is another name for the cul-de-sac. My cervix is only 2.75" from the opening of my vagina.

Touching or rubbing the cervix or the uterus doesn't hurt, but hitting it does. It has a pain threshold.

Different women have different length vaginas, but even then a wide range of factors can affect how deep any particular woman's vagina will get. See the thread called "How Deep is Your Pussy?" for a poll and discussion on this topic.

I hope this was helpful.

 

[dolfette]

Touching or rubbing the cervix or the uterus doesn't hurt, but hitting it does. It has a pain threshold.

unless she has cervical abrasions,
in which case she might jump three feet in the air and scream.

 

[petite]

unless she has cervical abrasions,
in which case she might jump three feet in the air and scream.

True! Lots of different kinds of infections and diseases can also cause pain. She may need to see her gynecologist.

 

[Chark]

In my case, it's the tilt of my uterus that causes the pain when he hits it, not just the cervix. Certain positions allow for deeper penetration. He can't even go in half-way when we're face-to-face but he can bury it doggy style. Try different positions and see if one works better than another.

 

[need2bsexy2]

I have found that it is the position you are in. Doing doggy, I hit bottom every time and it hurts them. Doing missionary or cowgirl, no problem. My current favorite position is the scissors. This is where I scissor my legs over one of her legs and she throws the other leg over my hips. Nobody's body weight is on the other and you can stroke for a long time.

 

[petite]

I have found that it is the position you are in. Doing doggy, I hit bottom every time and it hurts them. Doing missionary or cowgirl, no problem. My current favorite position is the scissors. This is where I scissor my legs over one of her legs and she throws the other leg over my hips. Nobody's body weight is on the other and you can stroke for a long time.

I love this position, especially since it's one of those positions that's wonderful for looking into one another's eyes and kissing. You're right about stroking for a long time. It's a great position if you want to spend all weekend in bed, and it's great because it's easy for either person to play with her clit. I'm a big fan of this position, but it's one that TheBoyfriend isn't fond of.

Any position that puts my thighs at 90 degrees or less to my torso shortens my vagina. Missionary seems to make the vagina the longest.

 

[HazelGod]

The shape of your lover's penis also plays a big part. For example, if he's built with a strong upward curve, then any face-to-face position is going to put pressure on her cervix during deep penetration.

 

[Chark]

The shape of your lover's penis also plays a big part. For example, if he's built with a strong upward curve, then any face-to-face position is going to put pressure on her cervix during deep penetration.

This is the opposite for me, he's bend downward and hits me because I also happen to be tilting backwards, bad combo. Luckily that will be taken care of next month (me, that is), can't fucking wait! 6 weeks without sex? That sucks, that's why I haven't gotten my hood pierced, couldn't wait the healing time.