Question for guys looking for "women OR couples"

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by gymfresh, Jan 17, 2010.

  1. gymfresh

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,659
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Rodinia
    Verified:
    Photo
    Seems on lots of sites I visit there are many guys actively seeking or willing to meet "women or couples". Please help me out here; I'm a little confused. I'm not judging, just wondering what the average spectrum of such a search really means.

    I don't know much about MMF situations; I've never been in one. Last time I was even partially undressed in bed with a woman was back in college. But it seems to me that if you're straight, you're looking to be with a woman and if you're gay, you're looking to be with another man. And I understand the concept of bi, though in my experience most bisexuals in fact lean one way or the other. Some don't.

    So what's up with so many guys saying they're cool with "women or couples"? At first I thought it was from guys indicating they were somewhat bi. But then I started seeing profiles (not here) from guys saying "Thanks for the interest in my profile/pics guys, but I'm NOT INTO GUYS AT ALL. Totally 100% hetero. Stop messaging me. Only seeking women or couples."

    WTF?

    Does this mean it's just a ploy to get to the female of the couple, and you're going to lock the boyfriend or husband in the bathroom? Or seeking couples where the guy is a cuckold? Does it mean "I want to fuck your wife, and you can be in the bed, too, but if you so much as look at me I'm out of there"? We can both touch her or even fuck her at the same time and make skin contact with each other, but only inadvertently? What about friendly fire? Or "I like guys but just enough that you can hold my balls while I fuck your wife"? Or "I'll never admit it in my profile but I'll trade handjobs/blowjobs with you but the woman is still our focus"? Or could be any of the above?

    Firstly I'm trying to reconcile the somewhat defensive or even homophobic comments with the willingness to hook up with couples -- and I'm pretty sure they don't mean lesbian couples. But I'm also curious about what a lot of guys expect or are willing to try when they advertise for "women & couples" or "seek women; couples OK". Are the latter 2 different and I'm missing the nuance here?

    I sort of get it where the advertiser is partnered, and seeks women or couples. That implies to me that he's happy with either a) getting to the woman himself or b) swapping. But single guys advertising for women or couples is still a mystery to me. I try to put myself in that position and imagine whether I would be comfortable in a situation with an M-F couple, and I'm really not. If I want the guy, I want the guy. Period. If I'm turned on by a particular woman, I want to be with just her, but definitely no guy around. Of course, I haven't tried it, so I'm not ruling it out definitively.

    In my heart I'd like to believe that the explosion of such ads indicates that men all over America are getting comfortable enough with their sexuality that another guy in the bed doesn't bother them, and they might even be happy to get off with the other guy. But something tells me it doesn't....
     
  2. D_Petherick_Poundlouder

    Joined:
    Jun 10, 2006
    Messages:
    1,064
    Likes Received:
    0
    I was going to do it with a couple. Didn't want the guy blowing me when he asked. Still in my plans to mug down with this couple, and this thread just reminded me I should e-mail them.

    But the cross fire stuff isn't my concern. Just focus on the girl and don't touch my dick please =)
     
  3. Sergeant_Torpedo

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 5, 2006
    Messages:
    1,409
    Likes Received:
    4
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK
    If it is no interest to you why are you mithering about it like a couple of old maids.
     
  4. gymfresh

    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jan 8, 2008
    Messages:
    1,659
    Albums:
    3
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Rodinia
    Verified:
    Photo
    Gee, sorry sarge, didn't realize that trying to understand a whole segment of the population was off-limits because I'm not one of them. Maybe I'm just interested in knowing whether more guys may be open to guy-on-guy stuff than claim to be -- or insist they're not.

    I just like honesty. If you're going to advertise for couples, seems to me you're interested in "the couple", not just in a backdoor way of getting to the female. Or am I missing something?
     
  5. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2006
    Messages:
    7,319
    Likes Received:
    21
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Southwest U.S.
    You're like me gymfresh. You expect things to make sense. In the arena of sex, more than anywhere else, this isn't so. Most people don't really know why they do things or want to do things. Couldn't even explain their motivations to themselves. Looking back, I often can't explain the things I've done. Just seemed important at the time. People want to experience things, not explain them.
     
  6. StrictlyAvg

    StrictlyAvg Member

    Joined:
    Oct 11, 2007
    Messages:
    714
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    UK Hatfield
    Maybe missing the genuine "no-strings" element of playing with couples. FBs and FWBs always have the potential for one party to fall for the other, usually with a disappointing outcome. That side of things has been covered many times on these boards.

    And threesomes are a fantasy most wouldn't get to indulge with people they are actually already friends with, without some weirdness about the whole thing. It's a safer proposition than putting such a thing to existing friends (unless they're already a known part of a swinging scene).
     
    #6 StrictlyAvg, Jan 17, 2010
    Last edited: Jan 17, 2010
  7. ConstantComment

    ConstantComment New Member

    Joined:
    Jan 12, 2009
    Messages:
    550
    Likes Received:
    0
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Europe
    I've never understood the purpose of this question on a chat board. If you supress inquiries like this, then there's no need for one.
     
  8. D_Jared Padalicki

    D_Jared Padalicki Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2008
    Messages:
    8,104
    Likes Received:
    33
    What confuses me the most is that most of them also are looking for transgenders... I mean... Straight, but you want a "woman" with a dick... WEIRD
     
  9. B_dxjnorto

    B_dxjnorto New Member

    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2006
    Messages:
    7,319
    Likes Received:
    21
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Southwest U.S.
    That would be the perfect thing for a roommate I once had. A true hermaphrodite with big natural tits and a dick. :eek:mfg:
     
  10. B_Hung Jon

    B_Hung Jon New Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2007
    Messages:
    5,008
    Likes Received:
    16
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Los Angeles, California

    I think there could be a few different takes on this one. Some guys want to see another guy fuck a girl in person. Some guys want to experiment with another guy but aren't quite ready to do it openly. I once had a threesome where the guy was more excited about checking out my dick than fucking his girlfriend. He didn't necessarily want to do anything with me but was just curious. I mean, human beings are curious creatures.
     
  11. D_Ernest Porknine

    D_Ernest Porknine New Member

    Joined:
    Dec 28, 2009
    Messages:
    239
    Likes Received:
    3
    I very much enjoy being with a woman but I also would enjoy it if a man would be involved also for a little cock play, both with her and me. I am attracted to a woman's body but I am also fascinated with a man's cock. I am not really attracted to a man's body, especially if it is hairy... I guess I prefer the femine type of body. Having and enjoying both, and both of them enjoying me could be an awesome time!
     
Draft saved Draft deleted