Question for the ladies regarding homosexual male friends

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by Triasco, Jul 3, 2010.

  1. Triasco

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    Hi. I'm Triasco. I'm kind of new here, so if this question has already been asked, please ignore me.

    I've been aware that I like boys and girls for pretty much my entire life. In that short span of time, almost every girl I've revealed my sexuality to has gotten exited at the prospect of having a bi-male-friend, and many of them have explicitly said it would be even more awesome if I were gay so I could be their gay friend.

    What I want to know is this: Ladies, do you think the general population of your kind enjoys having gay and bisexual males as close friends? If the answer is yes, why do you think that is?
     
  2. D_Sparroe Spongecaques

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    I choose my friends for the lovely,kind,friendly,caring people that they are....their sexuality has nothing to do with it.

    I have no problems with my male friends being gay,bi etc etc.

    I have a gay friend who is the funniest guy ever,never fails to make me laugh with some of the things he says.He's very caring and very considerate and is a whizz with the hair straighteners (he's my hair stylist)
     
  3. HiddenLacey

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    I agree with Tasha. I pick my friends based on their kind, loving, funny personialities. I do not care if they are gay, bi or straight. One is not any different from the other in my eyes. You love who you love.
     
  4. Not_Punny

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    The problem with having close male friends is that sexual tension can develop on one side or the other, and this can get in the way of a friendship. That is probably why gay males are desirable -- you get the male companionship without the sexual hassle.

    My closest friends are all male --

    - my best friend (who is also my s/o)
    - my second best friend who, luckily, lives two thousand miles away (we visit at least once a year, but have successfully avoided a relationship)
    - my third best friend, who is my gay ex
    - an adopted uncle

    I have no female friends who are anywhere near as close as these four.
     
  5. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    *not one of the ladies* I intensely dislike any suggestion that a woman might find some particular value in my friendship because I'm gay. I find it offensive, just as I would if someone decided to despise me purely for being gay.

    A woman I'd just met the other night, who was otherwise very funny and seemed interesting, told me I was "her new gay bestfriend" I literally wanted to slap her. Needless to say I wont be calling her or otherwise seeking out her company.
     
  6. HiddenLacey

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    :rolleyes: People never learn.
     
  7. Not_Punny

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    You're bi, you're not gay. So, of course you'd be offended.

    Some people don't get it, do they?
     
  8. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Well despite the one percent I do identify as gay, cause I aint had nooky with a lady since I was a kid :wink: :tongue:
     
    #8 D_Tim McGnaw, Jul 5, 2010
    Last edited: Jul 5, 2010
  9. Not_Punny

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    I knew that! (OOops, I oughta look twice!) :rolleyes:
     
  10. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    I wouldn't want my sister to marry one.
     
  11. ManlyBanisters

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    You wouldn't want your sister to marry a woman who had gay men as her best friends? :confused:
     
  12. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    Pedantry will get you laid.
     
  13. ManlyBanisters

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    Whoo-HOOOO! :biggrin:
     
  14. B_625girth

    B_625girth New Member

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    okay, not a lady, so you can discount my answer. my experiences tell me that women( most men) accept a woman's Bi relationships as okay, but reject men's relationships that are Bi. I'm straight, btw.
     
  15. luka82

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    Very true.
    I have a girl friend and when I told her I am gay she said-I like you even more!!!! And I was-wtf???? Being gay does not define me a person. I mean I can be gay and an asshole. She apologised.
     
  16. D_Petherick_Poundlouder

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    Some girl did the "my new black friend" crap with me. Felt the same way. But I'm not going to come in here and say I'm all righteous and crap. For a long while in high school it always irked me that girls had a gay/bi friend, because for the most part all they did was cock-block. And they cock-blocked way worst than the girls did because you couldn't charm them as easily, and justify that you were worth the time of day.

    But now, it's not such a problem.
     
  17. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    If they were a gay guy with stereotyped gay guy interests I probably wouldn't be friends with them because we wouldn't share any interests (hair and fashion - borrring). But the same applies to metrosexuals and many women.

    So basically, I would be friends with them on the same basis as I am with anyone else - personality, compatibility, shared interests, shared values etc. If someone happened to meet all these criteria why should it make any difference if they're gay or not.
     
  18. Triasco

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    Some very interesting answers. So would I be safe in awesome that most gay and bisexual males don't appreciate it when a female friends enjoys their company simple because of their sexuality? Because that irks the hell out of me too.

    All right, I have another question, this time for the gay and bisexual dudes in this discussion. Have you ever had a crush on a straight guy who knew about your sexuality? How did he act knowing that you had a crush on him? What I mean is: Did he ever flaunt the fact that you were gay or bisexual and had a crush on him to his friends or people he knew, as though he were proud of the fact?
     
  19. EllieP

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    Since I work in interior design I naturally have male friends who are very effeminate, but since I never discuss sexuality with them I have no idea if they are gay or not. Nor do I care.

    I do have homosexual friends who are partners, both male and female. The sexuality thing rarely comes up, except when Justin makes a joke about it. He is a self-describer "flamer," his words not mine.

    Sexuality is not something I would base a friendship upon. It's of no consequence unless a friend wants to raise it to that level, in which case it ceases to be a friendship and something more - something I'd want no part of.
     
  20. D_Tim McGnaw

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    I think you meant "assume" not "awesome" :tongue: Erm this is probably a question you should ask in another forum. There are lots of them and the Ladies only have the one. :wink:
     
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