Question for the sexually active

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Zephyranthes, Oct 31, 2010.

  1. Zephyranthes

    Zephyranthes New Member

    May 5, 2006
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    How do you do it? Lol. This is aimed at those of us around here that have slept with dozens and dozens, maybe even hundreds of others. I'm a fairly inexperienced person, maybe somewhat attributed to a hesitation I have to sleep with anyone i'm not interested in dating as well.

    Safe sex methods are a must, but past that, what other things do you look for in a person to feel safe trusting them to some sexy times? Are there any signs you look at that you swear off sex even if they are very sexually attractive to you? Lack of trust, lack of them not being private about it, etc?

    Personally i'm looking into the possibility of a friend of mine, but I know she's slept around with a good handful of others, and i've never done anything with someone who has been with more than only 2-3 other partners.
  2. D_Fiona_Farvel

    D_Fiona_Farvel Account Disabled

    Nov 27, 2007
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    First thing I notice is if the person respects my boundaries. First, would be physically, does he respect my personal space and stand an appropriate distance away or is he all up on me? Next, if I say no to something, anything, and he attempts to persuade me to do something else, that's also telling.

    Then there's how they treat others you encounter, such as a waiter, or how they speak of other people. If every ex is a psycho, their speech is unnecessarily negative, or are clingy, as if threatened, when you are around other people, let 'em go.

    There are a lot of little things you will pick up on over time, but you have to have the experiences first. Note, crazy usually sneaks up on you, though.
  3. B_willy5904

    B_willy5904 New Member

    Nov 14, 2008
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    Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia - Home in the States visiti
    Self-Confidence has gone a long way for me. I think my confidence has been an attraction for many partners. Not cockiness, or ego, but a firm believe in yourself and your abilities to satisfy your partner. Safe sex is important, but self-confidence gives you more at bats. The more opportunities you have the more opportunities you will have to have safe sex.

    I have had sex with over 125 partners, but I have had a lot more opportunities than that. Another baseball analogy; The more pitches you see the more opportunities you get to hit the ball. And boy I have hit some real good home runs.
  4. 8060

    Verified Gold Member

    Apr 1, 2008
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    The Midwest
    I like to have random conversations with people about sex and how I like to have it. That way, I can learn about their own sexual habits once the conversation gets to rolling. If I want to know something about someone else, I try to find a way to tell that one thing about myself to them. I'll say, "I'm not that promiscuous," and hope they respond, "Neither am I." If they say, "I've fucked so many that I can't even remember..." Next!

    You can't really judge someone's sexual appetite by how people they sleep with. Sex is awesome and some people have it as often as possible. That doesn't necessarily make them a bad person or unfuckable for the sake of the thread. What is important to me are their sexual habits. Are they monogamous or flirty, freaky or reserved, boastful or modest...all about their habits and sexual activities. I don't care if a person is really ho-ish, as long as they're ho-ish with one person and safe about it. You can learn a lot about by person by just listening to their 'sexcapades'.

    Lastly, rumors work wonders when you're doing research on a new sex partner. Find out what everybody else says or possibly knows, then ask a sly fashion of course.
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