Question for you bi/str8/curious guys..

[budnboca]

What works on you guys? I mean, I've got a couple buds at work and other places that I would definitely be up to playing with, but no idea how to approach it. I guess I'm not really good at the flirting thing, so the question I guess is -

What's the best way for a guy to "come on" to another guy. Some discreet, safe way to let the other guy know, yea man - if you're looking for a blow I'm here for ya bud. Even with acquaintances (guy who cuts my hair, somebody you meet at random somewhere..etc.) ...I don't really know how to get the idea across..

Any thoughts? (and not a dog here either - cleancut professional guy, discreet, five nine, one fifty, brown hair, blue eyes - so its' not like they're just not interested...just don't know how to make the first step)

Thanks guys!

 

[fergusonsmith]

Don't experiment at work, dude. Go to someplace where gay guys go to have fun; a bar that has 'special events', a bath house... Just go with no real intention other than to have fun. You never know what can happen... Maybe have a great time, or at least learn something.

 

[crescendo69]

Start including the gay gays on your to-do list. They know more about man/man hookups in general.

 

[D_Fowlmouth Chickenchoker]

Yeah, don't do the work thing. But you can ask a straight guy if he wants to go out for a beer sometime and see where it goes. That worked on me once with this dude I thought was more straight than chuck norris.

 

[EddieL999]

yeah, be careful with guys you work with - but if any of them are really hot and drive you crazy, you can drop some hints and see if they bite, like a comment about guys giving better head than a girl or something to see how they react

 

[Phil Ayesho]

I know an otherwise straight looking married guy who is bi who got his tongue pierced...

He told me that, ever since, guys are always finding an opportunity to "inform him" that, y'know, where they come from a tongue piercing means you suck dick...

At which point he tells them that, yeah... it means the same thing where he comes from, too...
That often leads to a conversation and/or demonstration of how he is a recreational cocksucker....

 

[budnboca]

I hear you guys with the work thing...although there are definitely some guys I might be tempted to break the rules with, but I guess just using that as an example more or less. You know, not a really good friend, but someone you kind of know or at least can bullshit with for a few.

Meeting up for a beer is always a good start...but I guess that's where I get stuck. There was a couple of us used to grab a few after work on occassion, and this one guy and I would end up staying later usually. We'd sit and yak and bs but I never knew how to steer the conversation.

I would try to let my knee kinda bump his at the bar..you know - easy to do in a barstool - and leave it there for a minute, but would get nervous and move it. Chickenshit right?

 

[SEXXXX]

try craigslist first, it's not worth the trouble approching buds if turns out you don't like man sex

 

[budnboca]

Yea, I know - easy enough to find on Craigslist, but sometimes you're already attracted to somebody and want to pursue something with them - know what i mean? And, not a question as to whether I like man sex - that's a definite.

 

[Draconis71]

Suggestions sofar: The ones stating to AVOID the work hookups.... Listen to them. ;P I've seen some really bad/uncomfortalbe situations like that (akin to a trainwreck: Everyone wants to watch and see the disaster, but, not be involved). Sound advice seems to be the gay bar/craigslist type thing, or even try a gay chatline/phone dating service (but, be DAMNED careful)

 

[laughatbig]

Ok plan and simple. You sound like the kind of gay guy that like to hit on straight men, I am like that too. It used to work real well for me when I lived by myself. I would freq a sport bar or straight bar and start making friends usually with the girls. I would wait around for last call and single out the guy who came by himself. I would ask him back to my home for more beer, 9 out of 10 they already know what your intentions are. I was very successful with this process untill I moved in with my sis now I gotta do it in back alleys, ha. What ever you do be careful and go slow.

 

[Daisy]

I suggest that you work in into a 3some. If you can arrange a guy/guy/girl get together you can tell how into YOU the guy seems. The girl can be the bridge, esp. open minded girls like me.

 

[budnboca]

thanks for the tips, the sports bar and bringing a girl in the mix are good ideas - this is the coolest board - great bunch of people here.

 

[Countryguy63]

I suggest that you work in into a 3some. If you can arrange a guy/guy/girl get together you can tell how into YOU the guy seems. The girl can be the bridge, esp. open minded girls like me.

You are a very rare commodity, seaside. Beauty, Personality, and an Open mind. You do realize that there are not many out there like you?

You don't like animals and ride horses too, do you?

 

[D_Pubert Stabbingpain]

Ok plan and simple. You sound like the kind of gay guy that like to hit on straight men, I am like that too. It used to work real well for me when I lived by myself. I would freq a sport bar or straight bar and start making friends usually with the girls. I would wait around for last call and single out the guy who came by himself. I would ask him back to my home for more beer, 9 out of 10 they already know what your intentions are. I was very successful with this process untill I moved in with my sis now I gotta do it in back alleys, ha. What ever you do be careful and go slow.

And, when you get back to your place, you say or do what?
OR,
he takes the reins the minute you are in the door?
That happened to me once and it was the best damn BJ I ever had!

 

[budnboca]

Met up with a guy last night (str8 dude, just friends, no attraction there..) at a sports bar. I guess I was paying more attention and it was pretty interesting watching the interaction with guys. This one dude and his g/f were talking with us and he was making a lot of eye contact. Not saying he was interested necessarily, but it was interesting because from what i've seen, most str8 dudes don't make serious eye contact when talking to another guy at the bar.

 

[zawfi]

I hear you guys with the work thing...although there are definitely some guys I might be tempted to break the rules with, but I guess just using that as an example more or less. You know, not a really good friend, but someone you kind of know or at least can bullshit with for a few.

Meeting up for a beer is always a good start...but I guess that's where I get stuck. There was a couple of us used to grab a few after work on occassion, and this one guy and I would end up staying later usually. We'd sit and yak and bs but I never knew how to steer the conversation.

I would try to let my knee kinda bump his at the bar..you know - easy to do in a barstool - and leave it there for a minute, but would get nervous and move it. Chickenshit right?

Well, everyone gets nervous at one time or another, whether straight or gay. When you're flirting with straight guys, it's also easy to confuse "male bonding" (platonic affection for being with guys) with an interest in having sexual contact. But I like flirting with guys, so I'm definitely not saying that you should avoid it.

If you want to see if he's interested in "going to the next step," offer to meet at your place to watch a movie on DVD or watch a sporting event on TV. Drink beers, more male bonding, then when the movie or sporting event is over, talk about porn, maybe watch some, see where it goes and keep leading him on. Or if you don't want to put on porn, you can flirt more, talk about not getting any action as much as you'd like lately, or whatever. Sooner or later you'll probably have to explicitly talk about sex if you want to break the ice, unless he is openly interested in guys too.

Yeah, I know some will say to go to gay bars, which is fine if you're comfortable with that, and that you shouldn't hit on guys who identify straight, but if you want to try it (and I think it's hot), then go for it and good luck. It's what makes "bromance" hot.

 

[Daisy]

LOL..Countryguy..you are so sweet. I love animals and horses actually. (not in a sexual sense, no, yuck!)

 

[ginger_qboy]

I wish I could master the "hitting on str8 guy" technique!!!

There are so many guys out there that identify as str8 but don't mind gettin their dick sucked, for example...

I wish I knew how to find those ones!!!

All you 90%str8 10%gay guys - how do we know or tap into your 10%???

 

[D_Jerry_Atric]

Be open about who you are and honest. I like self confidence.

Do not lie, fib, tell half truths, and get sketchy and play games when we both know that you want sex and that you're flirting with me. I can easily tell when all of this is happening and when a guy is interested in me.

Avoid closeted guys like guys who say and think that they are "straight" yet have or want sex with men anyway.