Question? Is oral sex part of cheating on the other person.

Not_Punny

Superior Member
Joined
Jul 7, 2007
Posts
5,464
Media
109
Likes
3,056
Points
258
Location
California
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
The answer is YES and NO.

The couple being discussed in the OP obviously have an open relationship regarding the husband getting BJs from others. In this case, it is NOT cheating.

However, in a relationship where there isn't a prior agreement or understanding about getting BJs outside the relationship, then YES, it IS cheating.
 

marleyisalegend

Loved Member
Joined
Oct 3, 2007
Posts
6,126
Media
1
Likes
616
Points
333
Age
38
Location
charlotte
Sexuality
99% Gay, 1% Straight
Gender
Male
I won't say anything about STDs sine I assume somebody else already has. Besides, we're grown adults and are well aware of what we risk catching and passing on to someone we claim to love.
 

Tristessa

Experimental Member
Joined
Dec 9, 2007
Posts
213
Media
0
Likes
7
Points
103
Location
Norway
Sexuality
60% Straight, 40% Gay
Gender
Female
Anything outside of what a couple has discussed and expressly agreed upon as okay is cheating.

If it hasn't been discussed, and it is being kept from a partner, it's cheating.

If everyone involved is informed and willing, there's nothing wrong with it.
 

D_season 5

Account Disabled
Joined
May 12, 2008
Posts
620
Media
0
Likes
65
Points
103
Sexuality
No Response
so u must of voted for Bill Clinton...if u run without conscience, courage and character...odd that u would ask this question...but because u have asked...sounds as if u r questioning ur conscience, courage and character....
OF COURSE ITS CHEATING...
 

B_Morning_Glory

Sexy Member
Joined
Aug 26, 2007
Posts
1,855
Media
0
Likes
30
Points
183
Location
lucasville, ohio
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
These two statements are completely true.



But then, in this case, she doesn't care. So that takes what Phil quite rightly says above and negates it.

Look, just because YOU don't want your husband sticking his cock in someone else's mouth doesn't mean she HAS to feel the same. She doesn't care. He's not sneaking around - maybe they have a don't ask don't tell agreement - maybe she knows all about it, you haven't given that much detail. But it is HER relationship.

So you say it is wrong to you? WTF do your feelings matter in this situation. She's not asking you to blow him, is she?

You tried to tell her she is being cheated on even though she doesn't feel cheated on. Why? Why do you want to make her feel bad about something she is OK with?

I kind have to give some props to what NJ says about 'it rarely stops at a bj' but you have to take into account that these guys appear to have made an arrangement in their relationship that he can get oral sex elsewhere - if he breaks that arrangement that is different. But the nature of that arrangement is none of your business really. She's chosen to share and you think / know it wouldn't work for you and you have told her that. Fine! She's knows where you stand. Leave it at that.


it isnt any of my business but she made it my business when she ask us what we thought about what she told her husband he could do. but deep down we all think that she is afraid that he will get other favors as well. and we were trying to let her know that it was not quite right for her to let him have full play time in this area when ever he wants. when he wants and with anyone he wants, and her be stuck in a boring sex, he mite come home with std, or something and she will get it as well. just because she wont do that one thing. we also told her how will she know that he not just only getting bj but sex too. also i was ask by him to do that one favor she wont and i flat out said NO, told him i thought it was cheating, and i wasnt going to do that to my hubby. to finish your question to me. i think what they do is there business but when she ask us what we think and we tell her she made it our business. so i think i have a right to state my opinon to her when i was ask by her personaly for my opinon about her hubby getting a bj from other women. but we told her even though we thought it was wrong it was her choice as to what she done not ours that she had to deal with the out come.
he also knew from what we are told, that she couldnt do him before they were married, yet he wants something now that he never has gotten from her. hope this explain's better, it is hard to put a full conversation into a question on here lol, but tried.
 
Last edited:

B_Morning_Glory

Sexy Member
Joined
Aug 26, 2007
Posts
1,855
Media
0
Likes
30
Points
183
Location
lucasville, ohio
Sexuality
100% Straight, 0% Gay
Gender
Female
so u must of voted for Bill Clinton...if u run without conscience, courage and character...odd that u would ask this question...but because u have asked...sounds as if u r questioning ur conscience, courage and character....
OF COURSE ITS CHEATING...


nope i did not vote for bill clinton as i was not of age to vote that year,
 

Phil Ayesho

Superior Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2008
Posts
6,189
Media
0
Likes
2,792
Points
333
Location
San Diego
Sexuality
69% Straight, 31% Gay
Gender
Male
the acid test is Concealment.

Its not cheating if its agreed that its allowed... you are not concealing your actions, even though you may not be telling your partner about every little thing...
THey know you are doing it...they are fine with it...

Its when you have done something you know you would not want your partner to find out about...
no matter what the agreement... if you want to hide it... its because you know its not kosher.



But I actually knew a woman whose husband regularly got blowjobs from a gay friend of his.
He loved blowjobs and the gay guy lived to suck cock... and the wife? She didn't like giving head and felt that the gay friend was 'helping with the chores"...
 
D

deleted213967

Guest
the acid test is Concealment.

Its not cheating if its agreed that its allowed... you are not concealing your actions, even though you may not be telling your partner about every little thing...
THey know you are doing it...they are fine with it...

Its when you have done something you know you would not want your partner to find out about...
no matter what the agreement... if you want to hide it... its because you know its not kosher.



But I actually knew a woman whose husband regularly got blowjobs from a gay friend of his.
He loved blowjobs and the gay guy lived to suck cock... and the wife? She didn't like giving head and felt that the gay friend was 'helping with the chores"...

How about the said homosexual torridly kissing the curious wife because the husband is (admittedly) a poor kisser?
 

MagicJohnsonFan

Experimental Member
Joined
Aug 2, 2008
Posts
231
Media
1
Likes
11
Points
103
Location
California
Sexuality
60% Straight, 40% Gay
Gender
Female
this is utter bull... moral relativism of the worst sort.


Here's the way to tell if you are cheating...
Cheating is ANY TIME you offer to someone else, attention that rightly should go to your S.O.


Sexual attention is the core issue of what a relationship is about.

I don't care if you're chatting online about sex fantasies and you never even have contact...

Its cheating if its something you wouldn't want your partner to find out about... or to read.


ANYTHING you HIDE from your partner is a form of cheating.


Well said. The only thing I would add is that hiding these things can only come back to bite you in the ass. A good relationship can withstand a lot, but do you really ever earn back trust once it's lost?