I've been in your exact position. Like you, I was young and VERY naive (18 years old when engaged to my high school sweetheart). The biggest difference between you and I is the fact that I KNEW I was gay, even when I asked her to marry me. I broke off the engagement when I realized that there was no way I'd ever be able to live a lie for what could quite possibly be the rest of my life. She claims I ruined her life and hates me to this day (we haven't spoken in 15 years, at least not on an amicable level). I know I did the right thing and saved her a lot of hell and a ton of heartbreak, had this came to light 10, 20, 30, or however many years down the road.
Only you know what you're attracted to. If you feel as if you need to test the waters of a man/man relationship, then you should do so. You don't have to come busting out of the closet with a marching band, a parade, and a pink neon sign saying you're a big ol' homo. Nobody really has to know to begin with, and really, if you find out that a man/man relationship isn't for you, then you don't have to reveal it to anyone, unless you feel it's absolutely necessary. When I came out (broke off the engagement in 1994, didn't completely come out to family and friends until 1999), I was scared that I was going to lose my best friend and certain family members. It turns out that my best friend became my biggest supporter, and the family members that I was scared of losing, didn't disappear. Not everyone has family and friends with this reaction, but like you, I'm originally from the bible belt (southern Alabama), and it doesn't get more bible-thumping than THAT. One important point I need to make: my family may KNOW about my sexuality, but it is NEVER talked about, referenced, or questioned. I don't like that aspect, but it is what it is. Based on your original post, I tend to think that this is how your father will react.
I live on the opposite side of the country from my family now, and I'm just fine with that. I know I'll never be able to take any of my boyfriends home to meet my family, and I'm ok with that. My friends are what truly matters, and they accept me for who I am, and accept who I am in a relationship with.
Hope this helps.
As an added bonus: I will post a few stories about me and men if anyone replies to this thread and mentions this ad.
Now...where's my story? :biggrin1: