Questions for "Non-Anal" Gay Guys

[B_dxjnorto]

I get bored, and start wanting him to plow me.

Really, who can resist that bum. Do be careful to live long and prosper.

 

[JackM]

I've got less versatile as I get older! I was never into anal (either giving or taking) - the theory always sounded hornier than the awkward reality.

While I still *love* to get sucked, I rarely suck a cock myself these days. Luckily for me, some gay men are fine with that.

 

[Provlear]

Just another person throwing in their two cents here, but I'm really glad I'm not the only one out there who forgoes anal. Oral is all the fun I need.

 

[Earthbound]

I've been on the receiving end of rimming, once. Otherwise have never topped or bottomed. I've considered that it may be interesting to try ... but then, nah.

 

[MH07]

I've got less versatile as I get older! I was never into anal (either giving or taking) - the theory always sounded hornier than the awkward reality.

While I still *love* to get sucked, I rarely suck a cock myself these days. Luckily for me, some gay men are fine with that.

I'm like you; I've gotten less versatile as I get older, and I was never into anal. However, in opposite to you, I actually am not all that into getting sucked, but love to suck dick.

Hmmmm....England, you say.....

 

[maxcok]

^ Some people like giving, some like receiving, some like oral, some like anal, and on and on. Some are more versatile than others, but it was an epiphany for me to discover that there are people who perfectly complement me sexually. It is not necessary, or even desireable, to reciprocate everything.

It's all about compatibility, baby. As long as everybody's happy, I say. :biggrin2:

.
....diffrunt folks

....diffrunt strokes

 

[B_jeepguy2]

I mostly just make out, stroke and suck when I am with guys. That said I love gettign fucked in the ass but I have got to know a guy really well before I take his cock up my ass.

 

[CuriousFem]

I'm a little surprised at the number of guys posting here who do not enjoy anal. The top gets to really fuck -- to move his hips and plunge in to the hilt and out again. To push in slowly, either watching the bottom's face wince and his lips make that little "o" shape (missionary) or watching him twitch and involuntarily pull away, only to have you pull him onto your cock by his hips (doggy).

My prostate has the just the right sensitivity (I guess), given what I've read in this thread. Being fucked gets me off like nothing else in the world. For those that classify their orgasms, it's a brain/dick/ass/body event. After which, all of the above want to shut down for a rest.

Everything is tops about bottoming. The pleasurable pressure of penetration. The attention from the top, who is watching my reactions. The involuntary voicing of "oh", "oh", "oh" that seems to come from wiring connecting the prostate directly to the vocal chords, bypassing the brain. The sudden distraction of a kiss on my mouth while my attention is on my ass. Strong hands on my hips, keeping us engaged so my hands can grip the sheets or pound the mattress. The top's reaction when I use my ass to grip his cock, which does one of those sudden swelling motions that I can feel and that make him moan. And then, he thrusts with a purpose -- the horse is out of the barn and hell bent on a destination. His cock fills me so, so much, going so, so deep each time, that I'm doing everything I can to not come instantly. I am on the edge and it feels great and I want to stay right here and I want to enjoy this forever and I want to live right here on this narrow edge where I am always about to come... but I don't want to stay there because then he throws it into me deep and stays deep and I feel him coming and then I am coming and coming and coming.

HB

 

[deleted518773]

i love being a bottom ^^

 

[FRE]

All I can think about is extreme pain.

 

[BigDallasDick8x6]

This is also called Frottage or Grinding..

Actually it's intercrural sex if it's between the thighs. Frottage is usually cock to cock humping. I started the Frottage group here -- "Frot is Hot" Here's the link >>

http://www.lpsg.org/groups/580-frot-hot/​

 

[Joejosex]

i dont anal with guys, but i like to be a "bottom" for big dicks...

i like to keep my legs tight and let the big and fat dick "fuck" in the area between my legs and under my balls without condom...

I like to feel the HARD fat dick by this way, it makes me morn very loud and even scream...

my partners love that too

 

[jakeamule]

frottage is pretty good. I like anal the most but that's a real close second. It's not unusual to be gay and not like anal.

You could also grind between ass cheeks as well

 

[jakeamule]

you could also grind between ass cheeks and not do anal also

 

[gymfresh]

Frottage is usually cock to cock humping. I started the Frottage group

Traditionally frottage has been full-torso rubbing between partners, or one person up against another, including the genitals (genitals against any body parts, including other genitals). More broadly, it is the sexual rubbing up against any surface. It is sometimes called "dry humping", even though it may occasionally involve lubricant. This form of "hands free" sex was popular among closeted gay men for much of the 20th century as for many it wasn't technically a form of sodomy. This definition of frottage still applies to full-body rubbing.

Toward the end of the 20th century there was a trend toward performing and naming frottage of just the genitals, especially penis-to-penis. This was a slight change from traditional frottage, as it usually involves the hands in order to keep the cocks together. As a subset of frottage, this practice took on a shortened name, as well: frot. (With apologies to the actress Catherine Frot.) Lately some gay men use the term "frot" for any body-to-body rubbing between men, to differentiate it from frottage, which has no gender specification. But in general, frottage is the rubbing of genitals against a surface, usually another person, while frot is cock-to-cock stimulation.

 

[gymfresh]

I'm out of the anal game, though at times I have enjoyed topping. For the most part, I've found bottoming to be painful and degrading, with the top just slamming 200 lbs of person into me without regard to whether I was another human or a blowup doll. I tried everything; going trancelike, telling myself I was getting off on the "intimacy" (I wasn't), shifting positions, etc. I eventually had to tell my partners to just plain stop. It was misery. That, and I bled like a busted hymen every time.

In my current relationship (6 years), my partner has made it clear that he loves and misses topping. I've made it clear it ain't gonna be me (though I offered to try us being versatile a couple of times, and he's said "No way"). The more I've thought about it, the more I've come to realize that I'm happiest -- and best at -- just plain kissing, body contact and mutual jacking. I could be happy with that the rest of my life. Convincing hubby of that may not be so easy, though we're still passionately in love.

What I find increasingly fascinating and frustrating is that, for much of the straight community, anal sex defines homosexuality. When people are asked why gays shouldn't marry or why homosexuality should be criminalized, they invariably say it's because "it's not natural to take it up the ass." Well, what does that have to do with me? I'm pretty sure I'm still gay.

I hope this changes with the next generation. I remember sitting in front of the TV amazed and angry as Strom Thurmond, I believe it was, kept railing in Senate hearings against gays in the military because ho-mo-sexuals take it up the you-know-what. Anyone who protested that definition of gays was shot down by the good senator. I wanted to be a Senate witness and say to the geezer, "Last year in these United States there were 19,653,411 occurrences of penis-into-anus sex between men and women, and only 6,018,725 occurrences between men. So how does that act "define" homosexuality?"

It goes to show that when many people think of "gays", they don't think of humans; they immediately envision a particular sex act that's anathema to them.

Enough of my rant. I hear that barebacking with intact guys can be a lot more comfortable (which my partner is, but still not going there).

 

[FRE]

I'm out of the anal game, though at times I have enjoyed topping. For the most part, I've found bottoming to be painful and degrading, with the top just slamming 200 lbs of person into me without regard to whether I was another human or a blowup doll. I tried everything; going trancelike, telling myself I was getting off on the "intimacy" (I wasn't), shifting positions, etc. I eventually had to tell my partners to just plain stop. It was misery. That, and I bled like a busted hymen every time.

In my current relationship (6 years), my partner has made it clear that he loves and misses topping. I've made it clear it ain't gonna be me (though I offered to try us being versatile a couple of times, and he's said "No way"). The more I've thought about it, the more I've come to realize that I'm happiest -- and best at -- just plain kissing, body contact and mutual jacking. I could be happy with that the rest of my life. Convincing hubby of that may not be so easy, though we're still passionately in love.

What I find increasingly fascinating and frustrating is that, for much of the straight community, anal sex defines homosexuality. When people are asked why gays shouldn't marry or why homosexuality should be criminalized, they invariably say it's because "it's not natural to take it up the ass." Well, what does that have to do with me? I'm pretty sure I'm still gay.

I hope this changes with the next generation. I remember sitting in front of the TV amazed and angry as Strom Thurmond, I believe it was, kept railing in Senate hearings against gays in the military because ho-mo-sexuals take it up the you-know-what. Anyone who protested that definition of gays was shot down by the good senator. I wanted to be a Senate witness and say to the geezer, "Last year in these United States there were 19,653,411 occurrences of penis-into-anus sex between men and women, and only 6,018,725 occurrences between men. So how does that act "define" homosexuality?"

It goes to show that when many people think of "gays", they don't think of humans; they immediately envision a particular sex act that's anathema to them.

Enough of my rant. I hear that barebacking with intact guys can be a lot more comfortable (which my partner is, but still not going there).

Good post.

Although anal sex has always been around, it's interesting that 'til the late 1970s or so, it wasn't very popular. Then a change occurred and now many guys seem to be unable to get along without anal sex. In some gay circles, it's just assumed that all gay men are into anal sex, but that's just not true.

Also, for reasons that I don't understand, anal sex was much more popular among black gay men than among white gay men. Now many black gay men don't see others ways of getting off as sex.

The AIDS epidemic was driven in part by the increasing popularity of anal sex. We are urged to prevent STDs by using condoms, but those doing the urging seem to think that gay men engage only in anal sex. The STD transmission via oral sex, with the likely exception of HIV, is a serious problem, but it is largely ignored. One rarely reads advice on how to make condoms acceptable for oral sex.

In case anyone doubts the popularity of anal sex among blacks, to the practically total exclusion of other ways to have sex, check out this web site which is primarily for black gay men:

http://www.DickzToyz.com/lubes.htm

That is probably one of the reasons that the HIV infection rate is much higher among blacks than whites. On the other hand, there is a yahoo group for black gay men who are not into any kind of penetration.

 

[gymfresh]

I found an advert on Craigslist for someone who was looking for oral with condoms. I wasn't really interested in meeting him, but did want to know what kind of responses he was getting from the advert, so I e-mailed him. He said that he'd received no responses except for mine!! His experience, and mine also, was that no one wants to do oral with condoms and that guys assume that oral is safe, even though it isn't safe.

I've had the same GP for 16 years. She invariably asks, "Now you're sure you're only engaging in oral with condoms, right?" I've told her that that's a completely unrealistic expectation and usually only practiced by guys who are in the closet or just coming out and more driven by a paralyzing fear of bugs than by a desire for fulfilling sex.

I can sort of see where she's coming from. For a time in the 1990's I was having a horrible time with urinary tract infections, mostly NSUs. Gono was suspected once, but not confirmed. It seemed anytime a guy got anywhere near my dick, I got an infection. I used so many antibiotics I became highly allergic to half of them. This was a problem when I developed really severe epididymitis (balls like oranges) and all the truly effective abx's were off limits for me. Then, as quickly as the susceptibility to infections started, it stopped. Blowjobs were fine again. And I know they're completely safe with my partner.

No amount of explaining to my doc that a blowjob while wearing a condom is not really satisfactory sex has had any effect. Her attitude is still "no glove, no love", whether it's a butt or a mouth. I wonder whether this is the official line of the AMA or something?

 

[FRE]

No amount of explaining to my doc that a blowjob while wearing a condom is not really satisfactory sex has had any effect. Her attitude is still "no glove, no love", whether it's a butt or a mouth. I wonder whether this is the official line of the AMA or something?

It's not simply a matter of not being satisfactory if you are unable to feel anything at all. They should be recommending ways to make condoms satisfactory for oral sex, but instead of doing so, they simply repeat the same mantra.

Although I haven't tried it, from the information I've been able to gather with considerable difficulty, it may be satisfactory if a loose-fitting polyurathane condom is used with lubricant inside it. Polyurathane doesn't have the taste of latex which many guys find unacceptable. Having it loose-fitting with lubricant inside should improve sensation.

 

[maxcok]

What I find increasingly fascinating and frustrating is that, for much of the straight community, anal sex defines homosexuality.

Ditto. I heard an interview with the guy who created Will and Grace.
He said he was advised, and I quote, "Don't make it too buttfucky". LOL

It goes to show that when many people think of "gays", they don't think of humans; they immediately envision a particular sex act that's anathema to them.

Homophobia in a nutshell.
That and/or the internalized variety (no pun intended) viscerally accounts for most homophobic thinking, imo.
Can't get their minds out of the gutter (pun intended).

No amount of explaining to my doc that a blowjob while wearing a condom is not really satisfactory sex has had any effect. Her attitude is still "no glove, no love", whether it's a butt or a mouth. I wonder whether this is the official line of the AMA or something?

That came from the CDC guidelines in the mid eighties before transmission of HIV was well understood. The guides are super conservative, and I don't think they've changed a whole lot over the years, if at all. I couldn't say for sure, cause I stopped paying attention to them a long time ago. I've been better informed on realistic modes of transmission for at least a couple of decades, and very happily so. :biggrin2: