Race Rant

[marleyisalegend]

Wow, you are pessimistic, impractical, or both. Here's is a stereotype which totally works in your favor, and you're upset by it. Frankly, I can't believe you would rather people *didn't* hold the presumption that blacks were bigger.

Zayne, you and a lot of other people are not fucking getting it. First of all, it's terribly insensitive and ignorant to suggest that ANY stereotype could work in anyone's favor. I don't know about you guys, but prejudment and favor don't seem to go hand in hand with me. What about black men with small penises (trust me they're out there) who are made to feel inadequate because they're small?? because a bunch of white people wanna fantasize about these big gorilla-type trolls running around satisfying people with their huge dongs. now, for the last time, I NAMED THE PENIS ONE AS AN EXAMPLE IM TALKING ABOUT STEREOTYPES IN GENERAL. SINCE NO ONE SEEMS TO GET OVER THE PENIS ONE, IM GOING TO REPOST THIS SEVERAL TIMES TO ENSURE YOU UNDERSTAND THAT IM TRYING TO ENGAGE ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES, NOT JUST THAT ONE!

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES
THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

SO DONT FUCKING BRING IT UP ANYMORE AND TRY TO JUSTIFY MAKING PREJUDGMENTS BECAUSE ONE OF THEM IS ABOUT HAVING A BIG PENIS.

Seriously, all you people saying "relax it's a good stereotype" are you listening to yourselves?? Name one time when somebody forming opinions about you based on skin color is a GOOD thing!

"Disclaimer" The thread seems to have taken a more collaborative tone, We're back to actually discussing as opposed to everybody telling me how wrong I am and me posting childish rebuttals, so let's keep going because this is a good topic (in the right hands) and PLEASE no more disrespect or demeaning people.

 

[naughty]

Zayne, you and a lot of other people are not fucking getting it. First of all, it's terribly insensitive and ignorant to suggest that ANY stereotype could work in anyone's favor. I don't know about you guys, but prejudment and favor don't seem to go hand in hand with me. What about black men with small penises (trust me they're out there) who are made to feel inadequate because they're small?? because a bunch of white people wanna fantasize about these big gorilla-type trolls running around satisfying people with their huge dongs. now, for the last time, I NAMED THE PENIS ONE AS AN EXAMPLE IM TALKING ABOUT STEREOTYPES IN GENERAL. SINCE NO ONE SEEMS TO GET OVER THE PENIS ONE, IM GOING TO REPOST THIS SEVERAL TIMES TO ENSURE YOU UNDERSTAND THAT IM TRYING TO ENGAGE ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES, NOT JUST THAT ONE!

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES
THE PENIS ONE WAS AN EXAMPLE, LETS TALK ABOUT ALL STEREOTYPES

SO DONT FUCKING BRING IT UP ANYMORE AND TRY TO JUSTIFY MAKING PREJUDGMENTS BECAUSE ONE OF THEM IS ABOUT HAVING A BIG PENIS.

Seriously, all you people saying "relax it's a good stereotype" are you listening to yourselves?? Name one time when somebody forming opinions about you based on skin color is a GOOD thing!

"Disclaimer" The thread seems to have taken a more collaborative tone, We're back to actually discussing as opposed to everybody telling me how wrong I am and me posting childish rebuttals, so let's keep going because this is a good topic (in the right hands) and PLEASE no more disrespect or demeaning people.

There have actually been black men on this board who may have been average who because of the constant stereotyping (Within and without their own race) have been made to feel inadequate when in fact they were normal. I will never forget having to talk to one person for hours about how skewed his vision of his masculinity was because he had ingested this stupid, objectifying stereotype.
I will say though that we have a number of members on this board of every ethnicity who get it. Marley, In years past it has been some of our white members who have been the most vociferous in beating down this particular stereotype as demeaning to all men. I think you happen to have arrived at a time when for some reason we have an epidemic of negativity.

 

[marleyisalegend]

There have actually been black men on this board who may have been average who because of the constant stereotyping (Within and without their own race) have been made to feel inadequate when in fact they were normal. I will never forget having to talk to one person for hours about how skewed his vision of his masculinity was because he had ingested this stupid, objectifying stereotype.
I will say though that we have a number of members on this board of every ethnicity who get it. Marley, In years past it has been some of our white members who have been the most vociferous in beating down this particular stereotype as demeaning to all men. I think you happen to have arrived at a time when for some reason we have an epidemic of negativity.

are you kidding me?? i learned that within my first two posts that some people just troll the site looking for quotes to deconstruct and tear apart. you're the first person however to acknowledge that the one stereotype everyone keeps talking about (big penis) grossly objectifies black men. the people defending it, saying it's not a bad one are only thinking from their own perspective of fantasizing about mandingo, not black men who
A) might be small
B) don't wanna be treated like the only thing good about them is a big penis

my biggest regret is responding to the negativity the way i did, by spewing out legions of white stereotypes

 

[naughty]

are you kidding me?? i learned that within my first two posts that some people just troll the site looking for quotes to deconstruct and tear apart. you're the first person however to acknowledge that the one stereotype everyone keeps talking about (big penis) grossly objectifies black men. the people defending it, saying it's not a bad one are only thinking from their own perspective of fantasizing about mandingo, not black men who
A) might be small
B) don't wanna be treated like the only thing good about them is a big penis

my biggest regret is responding to the negativity the way i did, by spewing out legions of white stereotypes

No ,I wish I was kidding. This brother went into a deep depression actually and ultimately left the board feeling as if there was no room for him.

 

[yurkon]

where did it say for african american eyes only?
i didnt know we had to be black to read a thread?
so is it ok if we make a whole WHITE ONLY section?
didnt think so... you sound like fuckin al sharpton or one of those idiots, double standard, double standard, double standard, cry cry cry.. shut up already..... youve been freed, now go do something with your freedom other than whine about being mistrated, your pathetic, you sound like one of them, livin off welfare, crying that no one will give you a job cause your black, get over yourself, no one will give you a job cause your a fuckin idiot, black white orange or green, your still a moron..

WWW = world white web?
I think we need black net

 

[marleyisalegend]

No ,I wish I was kidding. This brother went into a deep depression actually and ultimately left the board feeling as if there was no room for him.

seems like there isn't any room for any of us here with meglomanias lurking around telling everyone they have no value and nothing they say is valid. you definitely gotta have some elephant-thick skin and elephant-sized balls to post in here. i'm just glad this is turning back into a discussion. the funny thing to me is as soon as i started spitting out those white stereotypes (purposely, i don't really think that way) they all increased their offense, after telling me i was being babyish for getting up in arms about stereotypes, and few of the ones i posted were demeaning (starbucks consumption, being wealthy). what i meant the discussion to be about was stereotypes that ARE overtly offensive and based on no actual fact. it's not a fact that all black men are hung although that statement is plastered all over this site. the worst part is that phil insists that it's human nature to stereotype. really?? i'd beg to differ. passing judgment on someone because of things you've heard before you know the first fact about that person seems like a major personality flaw. human beings are certainly insufficient creatures but i don't think prejudice is something everybody does. we all know about it but i don't get jittery when i'm on a plane and a middle-eastern person gets on board. when i'm walking down the street and a few black kids are coming my way i don't tense up. i don't discredit every asian person i see as having a small penis without having actually seen their penis. what's crazy to me is how people are actually defending this behavior

 

[yurkon]

No ,I wish I was kidding. This brother went into a deep depression actually and ultimately left the board feeling as if there was no room for him.

Naughty, good for you for sharing that. Sometimes I don't take the sterotype argument seriously and you just illustrated why I should change.

I know that sounds obvious, but changing one's outlook is difficult. As some of us work on negating stereo types, it seems there will be a series of experiences or news stories that re-enforce the sterostypes we are trying to forget.

When that happens, I second guess my thinking on stereotypes and revert back to, "well, they work".

If the world had a place where color and race aren't an issue, it should be an internet chat room. If not here, then where?

 

[marleyisalegend]

Naughty, good for you for sharing that. Sometimes I don't take the sterotype argument seriously and you just illustrated why I should change.

I know that sounds obvious, but changing one's outlook is difficult. As some of us work on negating stereo types, it seems there will be a series of experiences or news stories that re-enforce the sterostypes we are trying to forget.

When that happens, I second guess my thinking on stereotypes and revert back to, "well, they work".

If the world had a place where color and race aren't an issue, it should be an internet chat room. If not here, then where?

that's the problem with free speech, it gives every bigot the opportunity to showcase their unadulterated prejudices. media reinforces stereotypes because there are slight undertones of racism in the general population, so media caters to that. here's an example. i really want yall to think about this, which story are you more likely to hear on the news (neither are true, just fictional examples)

A) Sean "P Diddy" Combs arrested in connection to a night-club brawl
B) Sean "P Diddy" Combs donates $50,000 check to local Homeless Shelter

feel free to discuss but im my opinion the first story is the one they're going to air every time because, especially in america, we are OBSESSED with negativity. for every one post in here seeking help or advice, there are 20 that's just meaningless name-calling and degradation. something has conditioned us lately to be more turned on by negativity than anything else. the media knows this, so they assume that the only way to get our attention is by reinforcing stereotypes. here's another set of fictional examples, which story do you think is more likely to air

A) Gay Pride festival draws hundreds of supporters
B) 30 year old man sexually assaults his neighbor's two little boys.

 

[yurkon]

seems like there isn't any room for any of us here with meglomanias lurking around telling everyone they have no value and nothing they say is valid. you definitely gotta have some elephant-thick skin and elephant-sized balls to post in here. i'm just glad this is turning back into a discussion. the funny thing to me is as soon as i started spitting out those white stereotypes (purposely, i don't really think that way) they all increased their offense, after telling me i was being babyish for getting up in arms about stereotypes, and few of the ones i posted were demeaning (starbucks consumption, being wealthy). what i meant the discussion to be about was stereotypes that ARE overtly offensive and based on no actual fact. it's not a fact that all black men are hung although that statement is plastered all over this site. the worst part is that phil insists that it's human nature to stereotype. really?? i'd beg to differ. passing judgment on someone because of things you've heard before you know the first fact about that person seems like a major personality flaw. human beings are certainly insufficient creatures but i don't think prejudice is something everybody does. we all know about it but i don't get jittery when i'm on a plane and a middle-eastern person gets on board. when i'm walking down the street and a few black kids are coming my way i don't tense up. i don't discredit every asian person i see as having a small penis without having actually seen their penis. what's crazy to me is how people are actually defending this behavior

Oddly, there are times I'll defend stereotypes even though I know that isn't very nice. I think there are times where the stereotype isn't a fact, but my experience, or other people's experience always or almost always or enough times that it supports a stereotype.

I'm not sure if that can be over come.

America has so many cultures in it that there will be negativity between races and preconceived notions about people based on what country they came from. Maybe humans are just prone to label people for efficiency and it starts from there.

As an example, people from the far East have significantly better math scores compared to the rest of the world. That's just a fact. I don't think it's wrong to then form a stereo type from that fact. It may not be nice. It's making an assumption for sure, but it's a valid preconceived notion to begin with.

Americans tend to not know much about world geography compared to the rest of the developed countries. Again, just a fact. I don't think it's bad for other countries to assume I'm not that good with geography either. It's a starting place.

 

[faceking]

Nothing is more fraudulent than calls for a "dialogue on race." Those who issue such calls are usually quick to cry "racism" at any frank criticism. They are almost invariably seeking a monologue on race, to which others are supposed to listen.

 

[yurkon]

that's the problem with free speech, it gives every bigot the opportunity to showcase their unadulterated prejudices. media reinforces stereotypes because there are slight undertones of racism in the general population, so media caters to that. here's an example. i really want yall to think about this, which story are you more likely to hear on the news (neither are true, just fictional examples)

A) Sean "P Diddy" Combs arrested in connection to a night-club brawl
B) Sean "P Diddy" Combs donates $50,000 check to local Homeless Shelter

feel free to discuss but im my opinion the first story is the one they're going to air every time because, especially in america, we are OBSESSED with negativity. for every one post in here seeking help or advice, there are 20 that's just meaningless name-calling and degradation. something has conditioned us lately to be more turned on by negativity than anything else. the media knows this, so they assume that the only way to get our attention is by reinforcing stereotypes. here's another set of fictional examples, which story do you think is more likely to air

A) Gay Pride festival draws hundreds of supporters
B) 30 year old man sexually assaults his neighbor's two little boys.

I'm not sure it makes me bigoted. I'm attempting to express what it takes to change someone's view point. In this case, I was attempting to do that respectfully so that you and others may understand why stereo types are they way they are and what it's like to attempt to change our outlook.

I think if people would attempt to look carefully at what the other race lives with, both sides would understand each other more.

 

[marleyisalegend]

I'm not sure it makes me bigoted. I'm attempting to express what it takes to change someone's view point. In this case, I was attempting to do that respectfully so that you and others may understand why stereo types are they way they are and what it's like to attempt to change our outlook.

I think if people would attempt to look carefully at what the other race lives with, both sides would understand each other more.

i wasn't speaking directly to you, that post was to give everybody something to think about. i actually think marginally higher of you than most of the other people in this thread because you're the first to admit that you stereotype and the only to recognize that the behavior needs to change, my post was kinda just a general thing for everybody

 

[B_superlarge]

What if one's studies indicates to them that there is a general difference in penis size between races? I don't just study if there is a possible correlation between race and penis size, I study possible correlations between penis size and very many other factors -such as height, or hand, or feet, or butt size, confidence, number of partners, and on and on and on, so as to discern what is true and what is not. I'm studying the penis and this is a penis forum to post on, and hopefully learn something on. Anything that is possibly related to the study of the penis I look into it. The problem is someone may take it out of context (the entire study I do of all surrounding relationships) and say I'm being racist. That has already happened before. I go into very much detail in many of my posts in an effort to back up my postings. If I state that in my findings there strongly appears to be some difference, it's not a huge difference, but it's not just a bit either, how am I wrong for presenting it on a penis forum? I'm quite willing to post whatever my findings are. If there was no difference I would certainly post it. I have no doubt I would then be quoted and linked to many times, and be a hero to some, but instead I'm never linked to, and folks sometimes follow up by yelling.

 

[yurkon]

Nothing is more fraudulent than calls for a "dialogue on race." Those who issue such calls are usually quick to cry "racism" at any frank criticism. They are almost invariably seeking a monologue on race, to which others are supposed to listen.

I don't know that I fall into that category. I don't have a monologue in mind, but would be willing to listen or read someone's reasons for believing in a stereo type. I don't think stereo types equal racism. I attempted to give an example with kids from some Far East countries being better at math than Americans. It's just a fact, it could be a stereo type and a valid starting point of attempting to "figure someone out" that you don't know.

Maybe the very premise of attempting to categorize groups of people that way is wrong, but it's human nature. Do a search on American stereotypes, it's fairly interesting.

 

[yurkon]

i wasn't speaking directly to you, that post was to give everybody something to think about. i actually think marginally higher of you than most of the other people in this thread because you're the first to admit that you stereotype and the only to recognize that the behavior needs to change, my post was kinda just a general thing for everybody

I really am trying to change by understanding other people, what they went through, what they lived with, things they learned from previous generations.

I grew up in white suburbs and had very little exposure to racial differences. My parents weren't racist, so how I went down the path of stereotypes amazed and disappointed them.

I think you nailed it to a degree with America feeding on negativity. It's almost odd when the lead story on the news is something positive. It's a juicier story when a celeb screws up compared to something positive they've chosen to do.

Something is changing in America though, look at the presidential candidates.

 

[naughty]

Naughty, good for you for sharing that. Sometimes I don't take the sterotype argument seriously and you just illustrated why I should change.

I know that sounds obvious, but changing one's outlook is difficult. As some of us work on negating stereo types, it seems there will be a series of experiences or news stories that re-enforce the sterostypes we are trying to forget.

When that happens, I second guess my thinking on stereotypes and revert back to, "well, they work".

If the world had a place where color and race aren't an issue, it should be an internet chat room. If not here, then where?

IT is funny that you would assume the NET to be the "Brave New World" of sorts. THough one might assume that if you didnt show your picture and stayed away from racially tinged topics you wouldnt necessarily be seen as anything but colorless it isnt that easy. We have discussed this on here before.

Even in the "Black men" thread, someone confirmed for me what I had assumed as to why I hadnt heard from more black men on this board. Many want to just "exhale' when they come here and not have to fight the good fight in every post. So after a few stalwart attempts at posting and feeling like "The INvisible Man" they just go back to lurking .

Only more outspoken brothers have gotten involved in the mainstream if they could weather the shock of negativity that has often pervaded the site. That is a shame too because I have enjoyed reading the posts of many of our men of hue once they felt safe enough to come out from hiding.

This is a support group and it is up to its members to see that it stays that way. Feel free to call out bad behavior . It doesnt get better by being silent. However try to do it in a calm and deliberate fashion. Anger only fuels further uneccesary displays of negativity.

I disagree with Marley in thinking that stereotyping is exceptional. THough we would want everyone to take the high road in the majority of situations most take the middle and sometimes low road out of expedience. IT does go against human nature to actually think about the possibilities when under duress. BUt we have to try to do that in order for any progress to be made.

Marley, when anyone says "You people" that is throwing a whole group into one unsavory pot. People in general are not monolithic. There may be cultural similarities that make up ethnic groups but personal choice creates the variation. THough we have members of all ethnic groups here who may find it easier to take the low road , we on the flip side have some phenomenal and intelligent members who dont. I have come to love many of them regardless or their race , creed, gender or sexual preference. Settle back and find your own set. I have and I am glad I did.
As matter of fact, most of the time I dont think about it but my own personal LPSG Posse consists PRIMARILY of a set of sexy, cool, big hearted, opinionated, loving WHITE DUDES who I would defintely go to the mat to defend.WHo would have thunk it? I dont even see or think about their color. I just get a wonderful feeling when I am talking with them. Now mind I do have some sistahs and bruvahs in the mix as well. For me LPSG has places where one can "exhale" but you have to check it out and step out on faith to make those connections. I guarantee you will not be sorry for the most part.

 

[Zayne]

I can see how this stereotype -- I know, IT'S ONLY ONE EXAMPLE -- could hurt average or smaller black guys, but I still assert that it's not hurting YOUR chances of hooking up any. The point you make that pos and neg stereotypes go hand-in-hand may be the case, but would dropping a positive stereotype cause people to drop the negative one an quicker? Maybe. Yes, you are being objectified, but that doesn't necessarily evoke unpleasant feelings among all men when their penis is the object. You, however, are selflessly arguing for all the others who don't fit the expectation. How noble you are. Anyway, one could argue that objectification of any kind is demeaning, but stereotypes are not immutable, and when we've killed all the romance, beautiful lies, and fantasy, life will finally be true...and truely dull.

 

[naughty]

I can see how this stereotype -- I know, IT'S ONLY ONE EXAMPLE -- could hurt average or smaller black guys, but I still assert that it's not hurting YOUR chances of hooking up any. The point you make that pos and neg stereotypes go hand-in-hand may be the case, but would dropping a positive stereotype cause people to drop the negative one an quicker? Maybe. Yes, you are being objectified, but that doesn't necessarily evoke unpleasant feelings among all men when their penis is the object. You, however, are selflessly arguing for all the others who don't fit the expectation. How noble you are. Anyway, one could argue that objectification of any kind is demeaning, but stereotypes are not immutable, and when we've killed all the romance, beautiful lies, and fantasy, life will finally be true...and truely dull.

I agree that there are people who probably capitalize on the stereotype to their own ends, but many dont and dont wish to do so. Yes objectification is demeaning, and there are many people who demean themselves and others. So go figure. But for this exercise speaking for himself and many other men period he is not the sum total of his male member.

 

[yurkon]

Naughty, as I age it seems I'm better off keeping my yap shut. As an example: In college I was in the showers with a team member and noticed him to be huge. We were the only two there. I knew him from classes for 3 semesters, but never saw him naked before. I was envious because I'm not and assumed being huge to always be a great thing so I said, "wow Greg, you're huge". He replied with a simple "yeah".

Later that night he brought up my comment and said that I made him "yet again, feel like a freak". In my head I was thinking holy crap, I'd trade in a heart beat and told him so. He went on to say that he doesn't go through life confidently and wishes to just blend in all the time and went on to say, he'd trade in a heart beat as well. Eventually there was a tear or two on his part.

So there I am thinking I was giving him a compliment and instead made him feel aweful. Over the years I got to know him and realized if someone is super-shy, having a huge package isn't always great. I thought it would always be great, but he shared stuff to the contrary.

My point is that; my big yap really hurt someone when I thought I was being nice. Stereo types and race issues can spin to ugly really quickly, so I can understand why people lurk or choose not to set themselves up for abuse.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. This is a neat website and i'm amazed at the range of topics and have learned a lot here.

 

[naughty]

Naughty, as I age it seems I'm better off keeping my yap shut. As an example: In college I was in the showers with a team member and noticed him to be huge. We were the only two there. I knew him from classes for 3 semesters, but never saw him naked before. I was envious because I'm not and assumed being huge to always be a great thing so I said, "wow Greg, you're huge". He replied with a simple "yeah".

Later that night he brought up my comment and said that I made him "yet again, feel like a freak". In my head I was thinking holy crap, I'd trade in a heart beat and told him so. He went on to say that he doesn't go through life confidently and wishes to just blend in all the time and went on to say, he'd trade in a heart beat as well. Eventually there was a tear or two on his part.

So there I am thinking I was giving him a compliment and instead made him feel aweful. Over the years I got to know him and realized if someone is super-shy, having a huge package isn't always great. I thought it would always be great, but he shared stuff to the contrary.

My point is that; my big yap really hurt someone when I thought I was being nice. Stereo types and race issues can spin to ugly really quickly, so I can understand why people lurk or choose not to set themselves up for abuse.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts. This is a neat website and i'm amazed at the range of topics and have learned a lot here.

No, THank you Yurkon. I really appreciate your posts.