Bet that got some attention, huh? Ok, this is a non-sexual question about relationships. I have heard and read that children raised in a household of a different race will miss out on learning about their heritage. I am wondering how much of that is true. ***Disclaimer - I am choosing to use the term "black" I understand that some may get offended, but then others would get offended if I used African American, or just about any other terminology used to differentiate, but none of this would make sense without some sort of designation. I think that if you read on, you'll know that I would not knowingly try to offend anyone*** Here is the situation... We have a series of week long horse camps at our place that my girlfriend of 3 years runs during the summer. Some of the students are from a local adoption and placement service. One of the children that attended last week was a 7 year old black boy. My girlfriend (C) just adored him. I am at work during the day, so I don't have the interaction with the children like she does. I do however help on the Thursday evening camp overs, and I did notice that he was a very sweet young man. He has been in a few temporary foster homes, and his younger sister is in different temporary foster homes also. That breaks my heart. He and C got pretty close and since he was the youngest child there, she became his "protector". He seemed very surprised and reveled in the affection.On the final day when she was introducing them at the "horse show finale". He had to try hard to hide the tears that were forming. By the way, all parents are invited to the show, yet only his Social Worker attended. She said that it was the first time that they had witnessed him showing any emotion. Once everyone left, C seemed very down and spoke often of him (D). He has already been removed from at least one home where he was being mistreated. Today, the Social Worker was here with another child, and mentioned to C that the foster home had called and wanted to return D because "He was causing trouble at school because he was retarded" (their quoted words). So, we are considering it. Of course, I have to check with my other children regarding their feelings, but that's not my major concern. And of course if it works out, I could not live with myself if I didn't try and reunite him with his sister also. The officials are prepared to terminate parental rights if and when a permanent home is found (His Dad is unknown). Is there any information available regarding any long term disadvantages of a black child being raised in a white family? If they are loved and treated like any other member of the family, is that enough? I keep recalling somewhere someone said that they lose who they are. I disagree, but I wonder if that is because of ignorance and only seeing the good side. Of course, the flip side is more than likely an innocent child being passed around, never truly knowing a loving home. We were discussing it today and I brought this up. I mean, we are not what most would consider normal in most of todays world. We live on a small farm, and most of our life revolves around animals in one way or another. We are either attending horse shows, poultry shows, fairs and rodeos. None of which are heavily attended by black people. Not that there are none, but it is minimal. Now of course, I think it's because they just don't know what they're missing :wink:. We do each have black friends, but none that are close. Again, only because we are not involved in similar activities or social events. More like friendly acquaintances. Would we be doing a good thing? I just don't believe that the color of skin makes anyone any more different than the color of your hair does. People and generations just grow up with different interests. Am I making it more difficult than it should be? This is a major decision as it involves a child's' life, potentially the rest of that child's' life, probably 2. I can't help but think that we could be giving them the best chance by removing them from the "system", and welcoming them into our family. I look forward to everyones thoughts and input.