Hi all, been a LOOOOONG time since Ive posted here.... mostly just spent the years lurking and looking at pictures and videos. But tonight, something happened, and I just had to post about it. So please read this whole thing before drawing any conclusions (warning, this post may be quite long), and then give me your honest feedback. I promise I won't be offended either way.
So, as a quick background--a bit about me. Im mostly straight (mostly into women, but down to fool around with dudes if the mood is right), and I can only ever see myself getting into an actual relationship with women (with men, it would never go beyond physical pleasure). Label me whatever category that puts me into... straight, bi, whatever... thats not the point. The 2nd fact about me, Im white. Im not hung up about it, and I don't have a feeling of superiority about it... it just is what it is--thats how the universe made me... a white guy.
Why is all this important you ask? Well, it just so happens that sometimes Im in.. "the mood" and having a guy around to help me out sounds kinda fun... so naturally I turned to Grindr (LOL, dont judge me, we all have needs). On there, my profile simply says, and I quote:
"Bi white guy here, looking for fun. Mostly attracted to other white guys."
So tonight, I just happened to get on, and I was greeted with this lovely message from a Latino individual (see picture attached). For those that cant see the picture, this is how he greeted me, verbatim:
"You understand that racial preferences are racist? Making preemptive decisions about a person based on the color of their skin is racism. Check your white privilege dude."
I was shocked. I've never really been a fan of people who play into identity politics, but Ill be damned if people on the far left now think they are so "woke" enough to start dictating who I can, or have to be attracted to. I wanted to just cuss the guy out, or block him, but I thought "you know, lets see if I can talk to this guy rationally and see if I can construct an argument that would make him change his point of view and agree with me."
I won't post pictures of the entire conversation--its a long one--but Ill try to give you guys the gyst of how it went down, along with my thoughts, and then Id like to hear what you all have to say about it.
First, I tried explaining to him that although I'd consider myself unlikely to have sex with a black, or latino dude, Id happily still be friends with them. Does that still qualify as racist? He seemed very hung up on the fact that I was a white dude who only liked other white dudes. I then explained to him that as a bi guy, Im actually mostly attracted to Asian women over any other race, to which he responded thats racist because Im sexualizing Asian women (huh?).
He then made a statement that there must be a REASON why Im attracted to white dudes. To which I responded with this analogy: "I love steak. And I think onions are gross. (really, I cant stand them, lol). Whos to say whats right or whats wrong about that? Why am I not entitled to have my own preferences? Once again, this is simply how the universe made me, and I cant CHANGE it just because that offends you." He responded saying that my food analogy is stupid because "onions arent an ethnic identity that im excluding because its different from what Ive been told is beautiful."
Again.... huh? I don't remember being told that only white people are beautiful. And if I was told (and convinced!) that only white people are beautiful, then why the hell am I attracted to Asian women?
In the end, I explained to him that I dare say that if I was a white guy, who only happened to be attracted to say... black guys, he wouldnt be so offended by this. And do you know how he responded? Youre not going to believe this.... HE AGREED! He couldnt have proven my point any easier. How does a person not see the hypocrisy in all of this?
Afterwards, I told him I was going to be posting a rundown of our conversation on here, and getting feedback, and sharing it with him. I also intend to share the link to this thread with him so he can share his side of the story, and hopefully not be biased (lets see if he actually responds). If not, Im prepared to post screenshots of the entire conversation just to prove Im being genuine here, and not only telling one side.
So now, I ask you all the readers, to please share your feedback here.
I would argue that he was WAY out of line to begin by making such assumptions and coming at me that way. And I might even argue that him coming at me that way could even be proof that he harbors some "white hate" if there is such a thing--but maybe thats a stretch.
I would also argue that having a sexual attraction is not racist, just as having a sexual preference is not sexist, and just having a preference for ANY characteristic is not "x-ist". Not only that, but I for SURE am not obligated to justify why I find certain things attractive, and certain other things unattractive, nor is anyone obligated to explain to me why they might not be attracted to me--that is entirely their subjective opinion, and theyre entitled to it. And if the social justice-identity politics-toting left is starting to push to mandate how we think like that...then Ill just start jacking off on my own rather than being forced to have sex with someone I happen to not be attracted to just because it offends them.
Thoughts? Opinions? I'll be checking back periodically to see what you all have to say.
Thanks for reading.
