Really important - big dick gay sex and relationship advice required.

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Bobby_Jay, Jan 29, 2011.

  1. Bobby_Jay

    Bobby_Jay New Member

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    Hi. This is my first post but ive looked at these forums for a long time. Ive got a problem and I could really do with some honest, genuine and helpful advice.

    I am well hung. My cock is about 9 inches long and i think is about 6 inches around. Now I know on here that might be somewhere in the average range but in real life that makes it abit of a beast. In fact I dont think I have ever seen one bigger than my own.

    I am gay and I have recently started seeing a new man. He is amazing. I find him incredibly attractive both in terms of looks and personality. On top of that we have a huge amount in common. It almost seems like its destiny. But theres one problem and its one ive had before. Its to do with the size of my cock.

    Like everyone I just want to fit in. But the chances are I will never find a person who has everything that this guy has with a massive dick. Dont get me wrong he isnt small by any means. Infact hes nicely above average and his cock is gorgeous looking. I really want to make it work with him. But the thing is I do like to be pushed around abit in the bedroom, although i can do the pushing as well :p. But that doesnt really work when your cock is waaaay bigger than anyone elses. The only way I can see it working is if I dominate all the time.

    Before I met this new guy i was sleeping with a friend of mine who is also very big. I really liked that we were both hung, not because im a size queen but because it made me feel more normal. Not like i had to be this dominant super stud. But im not at all compatible with that guy in other ways so thats a no go. Plus I really want to be with the new guy, hes hot! But what do i do, just go ahead with a sex life of me dominating, self admiration and big cock worship? Or am I missing a trick here?

    I have tried my hardest not to sound like a size queen. In this instance Id actually wish I had a smaller dick because then it would work. I just really need advise from you guys on this. Has anyone ever felt the same? Been in a similar situation? And if so how did you make it work.

    This is probably the wrong place to say size doesnt matter - it doesnt really - but i want to feel equal. I guess you could say I have a few issues about how big i am.

    Thankyou so much to anyone who can help me out here!
     
  2. Bobby_Jay

    Bobby_Jay New Member

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    Hi. This is my first post but ive looked at these forums for a long time. Ive got a problem and I could really do with some honest, genuine and helpful advice.

    I am well hung. My cock is about 9 inches long and i think is about 6 inches around. Now I know on here that might be somewhere in the average range but in real life that makes it abit of a beast. In fact I dont think I have ever seen one bigger than my own.

    I am gay and I have recently started seeing a new man. He is amazing. I find him incredibly attractive both in terms of looks and personality. On top of that we have a huge amount in common. It almost seems like its destiny. But theres one problem and its one ive had before. Its to do with the size of my cock.

    Like everyone I just want to fit in. But the chances are I will never find a person who has everything that this guy has with a massive dick. Dont get me wrong he isnt small by any means. Infact hes nicely above average and his cock is gorgeous looking. I really want to make it work with him. But the thing is I do like to be pushed around abit in the bedroom, although i can do the pushing as well :p. But that doesnt really work when your cock is waaaay bigger than anyone elses. The only way I can see it working is if I dominate all the time.

    Before I met this new guy i was sleeping with a friend of mine who is also very big. I really liked that we were both hung, not because im a size queen but because it made me feel more normal. Not like i had to be this dominant super stud. But im not at all compatible with that guy in other ways so thats a no go. Plus I really want to be with the new guy, hes hot! But what do i do, just go ahead with a sex life of me dominating, self admiration and big cock worship? Or am I missing a trick here?

    I have tried my hardest not to sound like a size queen. In this instance Id actually wish I had a smaller dick because then it would work. I just really need advise from you guys on this. Has anyone ever felt the same? Been in a similar situation? And if so how did you make it work.

    This is probably the wrong place to say size doesnt matter - it doesnt really - but i want to feel equal. I guess you could say I have a few issues about how big i am.

    Thankyou so much to anyone who can help me out here!
     
  3. 9inchRob

    9inchRob Well-Known Member

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    I feel the same. With 9 inches X 6 Guys want me to top them and be dominant all the time but MAN to MAN fun is EQUALITY to me, not any form of domination.....

    I do find that when there is equality of dick size, there also comes a normality in the bed, and neither is put on a pedestal and expected to be some sex god.

    But where do you find them so that the rest of the relationship works as well??

    If you have to wait for a big dick, you might wait forever....

    Best thing you can do is try to explain how you feel; that your relationship is not ALL about your big cock, at least not to you, that this is the "real thing" and hope that he listens, and acts or he will lose you.....

    ROB

    ROB
     
  4. dad4you

    dad4you Member

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    Why does ANYONE have to be "dominant"? Lovers should be able to give and take on both sides, pleasure should be mutual and helping your partner to achieve that should be the aim of every relationship. Maybe you should start thinking with your heart instead of your dick. Friendship is not a sexual thing, but it can make sex very much more enjoyable.
    I have a small dick, and if any one wants to become my lover and starts with the game of the biggest dick "rules the roost" it is not going to last, no matter how good the personality is, because I consider that kind of abuse a total deal breaker. It does seem to me that a lot of men want to be dominated for some reason. I have never understood that. Ultimately it is the MAN who brings contentment and joy to a relationship, not his DICK no matter how attractive that is.
     
  5. 9inchRob

    9inchRob Well-Known Member

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    Answered your other post.

    ROB
     
  6. Bobby_Jay

    Bobby_Jay New Member

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    Thanks. An example of this being an issue is this.....

    I slept with hiim for the first time last week. Last night he phoned me up when he was drunk from his friends house. In the backgroud a guy i have never met was shouting '*** (my name) has a big dick!'.

    Ok maybe I should be complimented by that. But i dont want all this attention!

    Thanks for the replies so far.
     
  7. B_subgirrl

    B_subgirrl New Member

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    D/s has nothing to do with cock size, even in gay relationships. Why on earth would you think he needs to have a big cock to be dominant? Or is it just that you want someone who can top you with a big cock, because that's something altogether different.

    And in case you're reluctant to believe that a woman will know what you're talking about, have a look at Bbucko's post in this thread:

    http://www.lpsg.org/217289-dominance-and-size.html
     
  8. WillyLong

    WillyLong Active Member

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    Everyone's sexuality is basically permanent. If this guy dosen't have what it takes to totally satisfy you, you either have to get use to the relationship as is, or find someone with whom you fit naturally.
     
  9. Crt199

    Crt199 New Member

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    This seems incredibly superficial, but if you feel this was, you need to work it out or move on.
     
  10. exwhyzee

    Gold Member

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    I think sexual preference is pretty fluid. One day you might prefer blonds, the next day you get get off on redheads. If you seek a long-term relationship, however, I think you begin to connect to your partner in a deeper way, which results in finding a balance and compromise in your preferences. So...the guy you are seeing doesn't have a dick as big as you and you want to feel more equal...that's cool - but I'd suggest you give it more time for a deeper connection to develop. If after a while you still feel discontented in the fact that you aren't equals, then the relationship might not be working and maybe you move on. Don't judge yourself too harshly if a relationship doesn't work for any reason...but do be prepared to have a good bit of solo time on your hands in between relationships. That's the cost. If being solo isn't for you, then learn to compromise.
     
  11. Chase1600

    Chase1600 Member

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    It is your life Bobby Jay. While I agree with Crt199, I think it is not our business – your being what we think is superficial – if it is important to you. So you have to decide how important this is. Think about what exwhyzee says in the next post: “sexual preference is pretty fluid.”

    It was my experience that I would think I like this or that type, only to meet someone who broke the mold and I would go wild about them.

    I wonder if you’ve ever felt you’ve been in love – not just compatible sexually. If I fall in love with a guy, as I was so inclined to do, I liked him for being the way he was. His cock was clearly perfect because it was his cock.

    Were you telling us that this new guy had a decidedly small cock and that you, having a big cock, having previously been with a big guy, just couldn’t adjust to a guy with a teeny dick as a sexual partner, it would make sense to me. I don’t think it would be so much a matter of “size queen” as having to do with you definition of masculinity.

    But I don't read your saying that. This guy, you say, has a big dick, just not as big as yours and your are saying that by your emotions dick size determines who does what - or something like that. I think that's fairly significant.

    I’m a very averaged sized guy, probably a lot smaller than this new guy of yours. To me, being average is not inconsistent with being masculine. I can respond strongly to the perceived masculinity of guys who apparently must be small. But that’s my makeup.

    You may think I’m being superficial if I am attracted to this or that physical feature of a guy – and you are right, to my mind – but it’s my life and if that’s what gets me hot, who’s to tell me I shouldn’t pursue what’s hot.

    So you have a decision to make – no time limit on it – either you discover your attractions are wider than they seem right now, or stick to your guns and find a guy who meets your requirement.

    It’s your life.
     
    #11 Chase1600, Jan 29, 2011
    Last edited: Jan 29, 2011
  12. Beauxbatons

    Beauxbatons Member

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    If you want to take a submissive role in the bedroom, then--assuming that he is comfortable dominating--there is no reason why you shouldn't be able to. Cock size doesn't have anything to do with this dynamic, or it shouldn't, anyway.

    I think the best way to handle this is to be open with your partner about what you want, and make sure that he is on the same page that you are.
     
  13. D_Tim McGnaw

    D_Tim McGnaw Account Disabled

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    Just towed this to the right forum :)
     
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