Rebound Relationships

B_doogie888

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After dating a girl for 4 years, we broke up. We lost our virginity to eachother, and were each other's only serious relationship. Just two weeks later, she started a new relationship. It seemed very fast to me, as I would not have even considered dating another girl that soon, and frankly it hurt me that she could get into one that soon after. Anyone have experience with such a scenario? Did she do it to spite me, or could she really be over me that fast? I have heard that relationships under these circumstances rarely work and are based on extreme emotions, but would like to hear from some of you all.
 
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goodwood

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sorry to hear your realtionship came to an end after 4 years. that's longer than many marriages!
for her to be dating someone else after TWO weeks??? sounds to me like its a total rebound thing and it seems to me that she is probably doing it to spite you and hurt you and i have NEVER in my entire life ever heard of such a realtionship (1st one after serious long term relationship) working out. don't sweat it. that so called 'relationship' will be over before you know it.
you just focus on you and feeling better about yourself and processing the loss of a major part of your life. it will take some time but you will be all right. hang in there.
 

SweetLovesVick

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Welcome! I totally know that this is a rebound thing. What are you doing home? Get out there...... a whole world is right outside your doorstep and living begins today. Be confident that not many marriages last if you are each other firsts. I know I married my ex right out of college, we were each others firsts and he was a horrible 1 minute man. Use this time to be out dating (safe sex only please) and experiencing life. You never know your lady may see you out gathering all these new experiences and come crawling back to you in a year or so! If not she was never the girl for you and be glad you found out now and not later! Smile, make a profile here, gain confidence and have a great time with all those wonderful women in your area!
 

lowhung

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Welcome! I totally know that this is a rebound thing. What are you doing home? Get out there...... a whole world is right outside your doorstep and living begins today. Be confident that not many marriages last if you are each other firsts. I know I married my ex right out of college, we were each others firsts and he was a horrible 1 minute man. Use this time to be out dating (safe sex only please) and experiencing life. You never know your lady may see you out gathering all these new experiences and come crawling back to you in a year or so! If not she was never the girl for you and be glad you found out now and not later! Smile, make a profile here, gain confidence and have a great time with all those wonderful women in your area!

This is great advice and it's wonderful that you wrote it. Sweetlovesvick
 

DeepDish

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I don't think she did it to spite you, I think she just had the opportunity and took it.

Don't take it personally, just move on. Get out there and have some fun yourself.
 
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deleted356736

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You should consider dating someone so soon, because you never know who you may find. And even if it doesn't last, it can be good while it happens.
 

Riven650

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I feel for you man. It is horrible when this happens. But trying to work out if she's dating someone else to spite you is not a sensible thought process. You're just beating yourself up with that. It's not going to be easy but you need to start the healing process as soon as you can (this is what she's doing). You must try to look at the years you had together as a growing period in your life and not as a waste of time. Lick your wounds and look forward to the rest of your life. The right partner for you is still out there and you won't find her if you don't get on with your life. Welcome to the LPSG madhouse. Have fun.
 

B_subgirrl

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After dating a girl for 4 years, we broke up. We lost our virginity to eachother, and were each other's only serious relationship. Just two weeks later, she started a new relationship. It seemed very fast to me, as I would not have even considered dating another girl that soon, and frankly it hurt me that she could get into one that soon after. Anyone have experience with such a scenario? Did she do it to spite me, or could she really be over me that fast? I have heard that relationships under these circumstances rarely work and are based on extreme emotions, but would like to hear from some of you all.

I was with my ex for four years. When we broke up he found someone else within a month. I don't think they do it to spite anyone. I think they just know that they have to move on some time and it might as well be now. Don't be hurt by it. Everyone has different ways of dealing with a break up. (His new relationship lasted a very short time BTW).
 

Riven650

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You gotta dig deep and wish them well. Really. Once you find that generosity you're a better person and you have much more to offer your next partner. Easy for me to say now, but when my first 'marriage' ended I wasted a lot of time going round and round in circles feeling bitter until I decided to let it go.
 

Tevye

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After dating a girl for 4 years, we broke up. We lost our virginity to eachother, and were each other's only serious relationship. Just two weeks later, she started a new relationship. It seemed very fast to me, as I would not have even considered dating another girl that soon, and frankly it hurt me that she could get into one that soon after. Anyone have experience with such a scenario? Did she do it to spite me, or could she really be over me that fast? I have heard that relationships under these circumstances rarely work and are based on extreme emotions, but would like to hear from some of you all.
I can positively say that the rebound relationship can work it is how I met my wife of now more than 20 years. She had ended a 2 year relationship which had progressed to engagement I was coming from a nearly 3 year relationship.