Recipes...

[Dr. Dilznick]

My entry:


Heart Murmur Deluxe
~~~~~~~~~~~~

1 Italian Sausage
Italian Dressing
Bacon
Spicy mustard
green pepper and onion
2 ounces of Philadelphia cream cheese
American cheese
goddamn bun


Marinate sausage for 1 hour in dressing, then fry in skillet. Wrap cheese around the fucker when it's almost done. Fry bacon in same fat and oil and wrap around sausage when done.

Apply mustard, pepper, cream cheese and whatnot.

Die.

 

[Pecker]

Originally posted by ChimeraTX@Jul 24 2005, 01:23 PM
Canned tuna, mustard, and relish on saltines is good. That's about all I know how to make.

[post=331434]Quoted post[/post]​

Well, that explains the breath. :grr:

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

Uncle Dilz's Old Fashioned Pork Chop Sandwich
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One pork chop
One fried egg
American Cheese
Swiss Cheese
Pepperjack Cheese
Chili Sauce
Fried Bacon (round)
(3 teaspoons) Whiskey (for taste)
Pepper flakes
minced garlic
Thousand Island dressing
fried onion ring
Hot Sauce
bun


Soak pork chop in whiskey, red peppers and dressing for 2 hours. Fry the Onion rings and the egg in the meanwhile. Fry the pork chop later and layer the 3 cheeses and egg on the chop. Smear Thousand Island on buns and minced garlic. Slap the fucking chop on the bun, add rest of goodies.

TASTY AS THE FUCK.

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by Dr. Dilznick+Aug 11 2005, 07:08 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Dr. Dilznick &#064; Aug 11 2005, 07:08 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'>1 Italian Sausage
Italian Dressing
Bacon
Spicy mustard
green pepper and onion
2 ounces of Philadelphia cream cheese
American cheese
goddamn bun
[/b]

Uh, excuse me, but as I recall, you said about my contribution:
<!--QuoteBegin-Dr. Dilznick
Philadelphia cream cheese? That shit wouldn&#39;t fly in my kitchen.[/quote]

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper+--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(DoubleMeatWhopper)</div><div class='quotemain'>Uh, excuse me, but as I recall, you said about my contribution:
<!--QuoteBegin-Dr. Dilznick
Philadelphia cream cheese? That shit wouldn&#39;t fly in my kitchen.

[/b][/quote]
I know what I said. Just trying to please the masses. I know a lot of y&#39;all are on strained budgets (college, white trash, whatnot). I&#39;m always searching for next level of poverty-addled cuisine, ya dig?

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by Dr. Dilznick+Aug 11 2005, 10:17 AM--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Dr. Dilznick &#064; Aug 11 2005, 10:17 AM)</div><div class='quotemain'>

Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper@
Uh, excuse me, but as I recall, you said about my contribution:
<!--QuoteBegin-Dr. Dilznick

Philadelphia cream cheese? That shit wouldn&#39;t fly in my kitchen.

I know what I said. Just trying to please the masses. I know a lot of y&#39;all are on strained budgets (college, white trash, whatnot). I&#39;m always searching for next level of poverty-addled cuisine, ya dig?

[post=334519]Quoted post[/post]​

[/b][/quote]

Well, I can assure you that Poulet Gaïotti is not about poverty. Actually, my version of the recipe is a concession to health concerns: cream cheese instead of Brie, turkey bacon unstead of pork, olive oil-flavoured and butter-flavoured cooking sprays instead of the real thing. Of course one can always use the traditional ingredients and pass the rest of the evening listening to his arteries hardening, if he prefers.

 

[cypher13]

Because that roasted asparagus sounds so great, I offer you, courtesy of my late Quaker grandmother, Ethelwyn Morell Folger (1896-1994), sugar cream pie....

3/4 cup granulated sugar
2 1/2 cups whipping cream
1/4 cup brown sugar
1/4 cup cornstarch
1 tsp vanilla extract
1/2 cup butter
1 9 inch pie shell, lightly baked
a sprinkle of ground cinnamon

Heat your oven to 325 degrees

In a saucepan, mix the granulated sugar and cream..bring it to a gentle boil

In another saucepan, mix the brown sugar, cornstarch and other ingredients through the vanilla extract; gradually whisk in the cream mixture already prepared, then add the butter. Whisk it constantly until it gently boils and thickens. Then simmer it for about a minute.

Pour this into the pie shell and sprinkle it with cinnamon

Bake this until the top is golden brown...

This pie thickens on cooling (unfortunately, so do your arteries). You must be sure to cool and chill this before serving, else you will have a liquid mess. This is the voice of experience speaking.

Sit down before consuming as you are likely to swoon in ecstacy.....

I imagine half and half can be substituted for heavy cream if you do not want to someday string a harp with your arteries. You can also substitute vanilla beans for the extract and/or add a touch of ground nutmeg for devastatingly delicious variations on a theme.

That woman could sure cook.

 

[prepstudinsc]

Originally posted by cypher13@Aug 11 2005, 12:28 PM
Because that roasted asparagus sounds so great, I offer you, courtesy of my late Quaker grandmother, Ethelwyn Morell Folger (1896-1994), sugar cream pie....

I imagine half and half can be substituted for heavy cream if you do not want to someday string a harp with your arteries. You can also substitute vanilla beans for the extract and/or add a touch of ground nutmeg for devastatingly delicious variations on a theme.

That woman could sure cook.

[post=334540]Quoted post[/post]​

I love sugar cream pie...my recipe calls for nutmeg, I&#39;ll have to try it with cinnamon. It is rich and decadent. Who cares if your arteries harden as you eat it--you&#39;re going to die happy&#33;

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

Originally posted by DoubleMeatWhopper
Well, I can assure you that Poulet Gaïotti is not about poverty. Actually, my version of the recipe is a concession to health concerns: cream cheese instead of Brie, turkey bacon unstead of pork, olive oil-flavoured and butter-flavoured cooking sprays instead of the real thing.

Processed foods are never healthy foods, regardless of their fat content.

What is sold in supermarkets as cream cheese is nothing of the sort. It is an industrial concoction of milk, enough cream to claim it&#39;s in there and all sorts of gums and stabilizers to make it appear like what it isn&#39;t. Just read the ingredients on the label of your favorite brand. Cream cheese is supposed to be made from cream and would be outrageously expensive if it was.

Needless to say, the concoction tastes nothing like real cream cheese but most people have never tasted real cream cheese so the hoax goes on.

Of course one can always use the traditional ingredients and pass the rest of the evening listening to his arteries hardening, if he prefers.

Yeah, eating that shit would probably make your heart implode. I&#39;m used to it, though.

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

It only gets worse.



Turbo Ramen
~~~~~~~~~~

2 Eggs scrambled
Ramen Packet (discard death salt seasoning)
Onion
Soy Sauce
pork
garlic minced
malt liquor (for taste)

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

Forgot: it ain&#39;t true Turbo Ramen unless you dab some cocaine into that mother fucker.

 

[D_Barbi_Queue]

Easy Key Lime Pie (from one of my favorite little restaurants in Jacksonville, FL)

14 oz can condensed milk
4 oz key lime juice
8 oz cool whip
1 graham cracker crust

Mix milk, lime juice and Cool Whip. Pour into crust. Refridge for 2 hrs.

 

[Dr. Dilznick]

Sausage, Cheese, Bell Pepper and Onion Omelet
more cheese
Jelly
Toast

basically a homemade McGriddle

 

[steve319]

Mango Salsa

3 ripe mangoes, peeled and cubed
1 cup or so fresh pineapple, chopped (or use drained can of tidbits)
1 small red onion, diced
1 red bell pepper, diced
2 or 3 fresh jalapeno peppers, chopped (and seeded if you&#39;re a wimp )
2 or 3 tablespoons chopped garlic
Lime juice to taste (about a quarter cup or a bit less works for me)
Chopped cilantro to taste
Pinch or two of salt

Pretty straightforward from here: Mix and then chill for a bit if you can wait. Great with tortilla chips and such. Nice summer fare.

 

[Pecker]

Real, old fashioned Lemonade

Lemon Juice, freshly squeezed from 8 large lemons (1-1/2 cups)
1/2 cup of sugar, granulated - more or less to taste
5 cups cold water
1 large lemon, cut into small wedges or thin cartwheel slices

Ice cubes.

In a large pitcher, combine the freshly squeezed lemon juice, granulated sugar and 2 cups of cold water; stir briskly to dissolve the sugar. Add the remaining ingredients, including the ice cubes, and stir briskly again.

 

[naughty]

Mama Jefferson&#39;s Smothered Catfish

4 fresh Catfish, fileted and cut in half
1/2 cup flour
1/2 cup seafood breading mix
3/4 cup peanut oil
3/4 cup canola oil
1 tsp salt
1tsp pepper
1/4 cup of cream
1/4 cup of water
1 egg
3 large Vidalia Onions


Mix water, salt, pepper, cream and one egg in a bowl for dipping. Dip fillets in the mixture and then drop in a bag of flour and seafood breading mix for coating. Place floured fillets on a paper towel to absorb the moisture. Place in the refrigerator for 30 minutes. Heat skillet with one part peanut oil, one part canola oil. Heat to frying temperature .Gently place fillets in the skillet and cook on both sides until golden brown. Remove from oil and again place on towel to drain. slice 3 vidalia onions. Place fried fillets at the bottom of a dutch oven and pour 1 cup of water in the pan. Next place the vidalia onions on top of the fillets and let simmer on low until the onions have turned translucent and softened, approximately 30 to 45 minutes. Serve with rice . Enjoy&#33;

Naughty

 

[B_DoubleMeatWhopper]

Originally posted by steve319@Aug 13 2005, 09:13 PM
Mango Salsa

Steve, I just wanted to let you know that I made mango salsa according to your recipe. It&#39;s considerably easier than my recipe, but tastes just as good&#33; Thanks&#33; BTW... mango salsa is great on broiled fish.

 

[DC_DEEP]

My fave is to make home-made onion bagels, but I won&#39;t put any of you through that...

Dinner rolls

1 cup lukewarm water
1 teaspoon salt
2 Tablespoons sugar
1 packet active dry yeast (not quick-rise) (be sure it is fresh&#33
about 3 cups unbleached flour

Stir together the first 4 ingredients in a LARGE mixing bowl, until the yeast begins to dissolve. Add 2 cups of the flour, and stir well. Add additional flour until dough begins to pull away from the sides of the bowl. Turn dough out onto a lightly floured board or countertop, cover with a clean dry kitchen towel, and allow it to rest for 10 minutes. Knead the dough vigorously for 10 minutes, adding only enough additional flour to keep it from sticking. Get physical with it - pound it with your fists, pick it up and slam it down a few times, this brings out the gluten for a good texture. After 10 minutes of kneading, shape dough back into a ball, and cut into 12 approximately equal pieces, shape each piece into a ball, and place into a large (I use a 9.5x16") greased baking pan or cookie sheet. The cookie sheet will give rolls with a crustier edge. Cover again with the kitchen towel, place in a warm place and let rise for 30 minutes (for a very warm place, 80 degrees or more) up to one hour (for a cooler place, 75 degrees or less) until the rolls have almost doubled in size. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees, and bake the rolls 30 minutes or until well-browned. Preheating is imperative for proper "oven spring". Turn rolls out onto a wire rack for about 3 or 4 minutes before serving. With a little practice, this is a very easy recipe, and I have always gotten excellent feedback on them.

Next week: homemade pecan sticky buns.......

 

[D_Barbi_Queue]

The BEST blueberry muffins you&#39;ll ever have:

14 oz of blueberries (can, frozen or fresh) - I prefer fresh
3 c flour
2 c sugar
1 T baking powder
½ butter
2 eggs
1 c milk
1 t vanilla
2 T butter

Preheat oven to 350. Grease pan with butter (or Pam) or use muffin cups in to line pan. Drain blueberries thoroughly (if using can or frozen). Mix flour, sugar, baking powder and ½ cup of butter using a pastry cutter until well mixed.

Take out 1 cup of mixture and set aside for crumb topping.

Add eggs, milk and vanilla to flour mixture and beat well. Fold in blueberries by hand. Fill each muffin tin ¾ full.

Melt 2 T of butter and toss with the 1 cup of flour mixture. Sprinkle over the tops of muffins.

Bake for 30 minutes if using a regular size muffin tin. 35-40 minutes for the large muffin tin.

Note: I’ve only ever made these in the large muffin tin and they make about 12 of those. I imagine that it will be double that in the regular sized pan.

 

[D_Barbi_Queue]

Another one of my faves and we get rave reviews every time we make it:

Seafood Gumbo

2 c chopped onions
1 ½ c chopped green bell peppers
1 c chopped celery
2 whole bay leaves
2 t salt
1 t pepper
½ t cayenne pepper
½ t thyme
½ t oregano
¾ c vegetable oil
¾ c all purpose flour
1 T minced garlic
5 ½ c chicken stock
1 lb polska kielbosa (or smoked sausage)
1 c okra
1 lb shrimp, peeled and de-veined
½ pint oysters with juice
¾ lb crabmeat
3-4 cups cooked white rice

Combine onions, bell peppers, and celery in a medium bowl. In a separate bowl, mix bay leaves, salt, pepper, cayenne pepper, thyme and oregano.

Heat oil in a large skillet over high heat until it begins to smoke, about 5 minutes. Gradually add the flour, whisking constantly. Continue cooking, whisking constantly until roux is dark brown, 2-4 minutes. Be careful not to scorch the roux.

Immediately add half of the vegetables and stir well. Continue stirring and cooking about 1 minute, then add remaining vegetables and cook 2 more minutes. Stir in seasoning mix and cook 2 minutes, stirring frequently. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute more. Remove from heat.

Pour the chicken stock into a large Dutch oven and bring to a boil. Add roux mixture to stock and stir until dissolved. Bring mixture to a second boil, and then add kielbosa and okra. Boil for 15 minutes. Reduce heat and simmer for 10 minutes.

Add shrimp, un-drained oysters, and crabmeat. Return to a boil over high heat, stirring occasionally. Remove from heat and skim any oil from the surface.

Serve over cooked white rice.