Regret / Possible

H.ricky

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In my years of being sexually active, I haven’t always been careful (not pulling out, just recklessly nutting inside, girls not taking their BC, etc.) so I’ve gotten a lot of different women pregnant. Majority of them resulted in abortions but a lot have also resulted in miscarriages as well which is more common than people think.

recently, me and my best friend started messing around for the past few months .. she got pregnant and we decided we were going to have the baby. Sadly, she got in a car accident and lost our child about two weeks ago. She’s okay. But it’s been a little difficult.

I’ve been reflecting a lot on past situations and how I’ve could’ve/should’ve been a father a plethora times over and wanted to ask if any other men have been through something similar. And if you feel any regret by not having a kid before or ..better yet pushing back on the idea of having one which ultimately resulted in the woman having an abortion.

this may be sensitive but if you don’t mind sharing. If you are a father or even if you’re not .. if abortions or miscarriages weren’t a factor what would be your # versus that amount of kids you actually have?
 

palakaorion

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When I was a young married man, we were meticulous about birth control measures. When we started playing with fire a few years later, using nothing but calendar method, we still never had a pregnancy. Then health issues arose that made pregnancy dangerous. Those health issues eventually took her from this earth.

I can't help but wonder whether we "missed our window of opportunity" to be parents by being so careful and responsible early in our marriage.
 

H.ricky

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When I was a young married man, we were meticulous about birth control measures. When we started playing with fire a few years later, using nothing but calendar method, we still never had a pregnancy. Then health issues arose that made pregnancy dangerous. Those health issues eventually took her from this earth.

I can't help but wonder whether we "missed our window of opportunity" to be parents by being so careful and responsible early in our marriage.
Appreciate you sharing bro
 

Longwood8

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Correction, this world would be even more overpopulated if we didn't abort children
True statement. But some would say this world would be even more populated if we didn't use condoms/birth control.

To the OP: Not a father here, but I have also not used condoms at times. I lucked out on not getting the girl pregnant, due to her cycle, or pulling out. I make sure to wear condoms mostly, but also ask if they're on the pill. I suppose at this point I could have had several children, but if any of my mistakes resulted in a pregnancy, I wouldn't want it aborted. I first became sexually active at a young age, and looking back on it, I would actually be having quite a number of kids since in my early years of having sex, not all girls are on the pill yet.
 
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H.ricky

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True statement. But some would say this world would be even more populated if we didn't use condoms/birth control.

To the OP: Not a father here, but I have also not used condoms at times. I lucked out on not getting the girl pregnant, due to her cycle, or pulling out. I make sure to wear condoms mostly, but also ask if they're on the pill. I suppose at this point I could have had several children, but if any of my mistakes resulted in a pregnancy, I wouldn't want it aborted. I first became sexually active at a young age, and looking back on it, I would actually be having quite a number of kids since in my early years of having sex, not all girls are on the pill yet.

thank you for sharing ! Thank God for luck, the pill, condoms, and more lol
 

RedDevilCock

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In my years of being sexually active, I haven’t always been careful (not pulling out, just recklessly nutting inside, girls not taking their BC, etc.) so I’ve gotten a lot of different women pregnant. Majority of them resulted in abortions but a lot have also resulted in miscarriages as well which is more common than people think.

recently, me and my best friend started messing around for the past few months .. she got pregnant and we decided we were going to have the baby. Sadly, she got in a car accident and lost our child about two weeks ago. She’s okay. But it’s been a little difficult.

I’ve been reflecting a lot on past situations and how I’ve could’ve/should’ve been a father a plethora times over and wanted to ask if any other men have been through something similar. And if you feel any regret by not having a kid before or ..better yet pushing back on the idea of having one which ultimately resulted in the woman having an abortion.

this may be sensitive but if you don’t mind sharing. If you are a father or even if you’re not .. if abortions or miscarriages weren’t a factor what would be your # versus that amount of kids you actually have?
Wow, this sounds like me. Yes father now. Had one gal who lied about being with child and completed an abortion. Then my first marriage we lost twins and that hit me solid and felt it was nature getting back at me.
So there is always a haunting of that in my mind.
I had several pregnancy scares at a young age because I thought it was cool showing off and breaking condoms. Two females to this day still have hate for me because of it.
 
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WilliamG

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Before I was married... Always wore a condom. One that I supplied. Even if she said she was on bc. Why? I wanted to enjoy my healthiest time alive experiencing life. I "lost" friends in bands I played in because they got their gf pregnant. I lost some of my surfing buddies that traveled down to Baja with me. I lost a great backpacking buddy. All before they were 25.

Then in a weird comeback... My wife and I try to have a baby and she can't. Luckily we raised a couple nieces for much of their lives. So we don't miss the baby thing.
 

S_Dick

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In my years of being sexually active, I haven’t always been careful (not pulling out, just recklessly nutting inside, girls not taking their BC, etc.) so I’ve gotten a lot of different women pregnant. Majority of them resulted in abortions but a lot have also resulted in miscarriages as well which is more common than people think.

recently, me and my best friend started messing around for the past few months .. she got pregnant and we decided we were going to have the baby. Sadly, she got in a car accident and lost our child about two weeks ago. She’s okay. But it’s been a little difficult.

I’ve been reflecting a lot on past situations and how I’ve could’ve/should’ve been a father a plethora times over and wanted to ask if any other men have been through something similar. And if you feel any regret by not having a kid before or ..better yet pushing back on the idea of having one which ultimately resulted in the woman having an abortion.

this may be sensitive but if you don’t mind sharing. If you are a father or even if you’re not .. if abortions or miscarriages weren’t a factor what would be your # versus that amount of kids you actually have?
I was dating a woman for about five years, and we were starting to talk about marriage, and starting a family together. She was on birth control and we were having sex a lot and she ended up getting pregnant. It was this weird moment where we thought shit, should we just go for it. We had a whole month where we were playing family and thinking about it, and thinking about having eloping on the quick. And sort of restructuring our lives.

I came home from work one afternoon and she told me that she had lost the pregnancy. It really is more common than a lot of people think. It really devastated both of us. We still stayed together for another year it and really loved each other, but somehow seeing that other world for a few minutes really messed with both of us and we ended up parting ways, amicably. There really was this crazy month where I thought I was gonna be a father and start a life with this woman. Life is long and weird
 
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H.ricky

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I was dating a woman for about five years, and we were starting to talk about marriage, and starting a family together. She was on birth control and we were having sex a lot and she ended up getting pregnant. It was this weird moment where we thought shit, should we just go for it. We had a whole month where we were playing family and thinking about it, and thinking about having eloping on the quick. And sort of restructuring our lives.

I came home from work one afternoon and she told me that she had lost the pregnancy. It really is more common than a lot of people think. It really devastated both of us. We still stayed together for another year it and really loved each other, but somehow seeing that other world for a few minutes really messed with both of us and we ended up parting ways, amicably. There really was this crazy month where I thought I was gonna be a father and start a life with this woman. Life is long and weird
Wow! I’m sorry you both experienced that. Life is strange.
 
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I cannot understand why the people is not more careful, really. It is not complicated to use a condom everytime.