Reindeer Facts

Discussion in 'Funny Stuff: Jokes, Quizzes, Games & Pics' started by Principessa, Dec 16, 2008.

  1. Principessa

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    REMEMBER THIS AT CHRISTMAS TIME . . .

    According to the Alaska Department of Fish and Game, while both male and female reindeers grow antlers in the summer each year, male reindeer drop their antlers at the beginning of winter, usually late November to mid-December.


    Female reindeers retain their antlers till after they give birth in the spring. Therefore, according to EVERY historical rendition depicting Santa's reindeer, EVERY single one of them, from Rudolph to Blitzen, had to be a girl. We should've known... ONLY women would be able to drag a fat-ass man in a red velvet suit all around the world in one night and not get lost. :biggrin1:

     
  2. Catchoftheday

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    More reindeer facts....

    Reindeers are reindeer NOT people :biggrin1:
     
  3. jeff black

    jeff black <img border="0" src="/images/badges/gold_member.gi

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    Oh, so her nose was so red because she was on her period? Is that why she ran away from her family, shacked up with strange men, and spent the entire film, crying??

    Yup, you are right. She's totally a woman.:rolleyes::biggrin1::smile:
    *come on njqt, you were begging for it*

    Having said that, another Reindeer fact is that:

    They always seem to poop on YOUR roof and not someone elses.
     
  4. Principessa

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  5. D_Ireonsyd_Colonrinse

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    njqt466:

    Part of your signature reads: Doubt means don't. Oprah Winfrey


    Yet, I kept reading (existentially?) "DONUT means don't." I think, peripherally, I saw Oprah's name at the end and doubt morphed into donut. I read "Donut means don't" three times in a row & it just wasn't making sense.

    I'm sorry... your thread is about reindeer. I will try to come up with a clever, pithy reindeer anecdote next time.







     
  6. Principessa

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    hahaha I thought you were gonna say something silly about Oprah eating too many donuts. Personally I love donuts and never doubt my need for them. :biggrin1:
     
  7. D_Ireonsyd_Colonrinse

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    njqt466:

    I read on one thread or another that you LOVE your chocolate. I must be a really, really bad gay man, because I love chocolate too - but I completely can't discriminate quality between Nestle's Crunch or Russell Stover's caramel turtles or See's molasses chips or Godiva. Almost ANY chocolate is ok by me.

    When it comes to coffee, I like lattes & I'll pay $3.75 for a grande at Starbuck's. Ice cream, I'll shell out a buck and a half more to get the Ben & Jerry's flavor I want. But, for some reason, with chocolate, I am just a generic, garden-variety, one-size-fits-all chocoate whore.


    Actually, I'll amend this. The Whole Foods Market by my house sells a jalepeno & bacon chocolate bar which is on the impulse-buy shelf at the checkout stand. Bacon-flavored chocolate sounds pretty rude to me & I can pass on that one.
     
  8. D_Tintagel_Demondong

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    My favorite reindeer game is....


    huntin'
     
  9. Principessa

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    Random Reindeer Facts
    Guaranteed to increase penis length & girth
    Ingredients
    1 TBSP crushed red pepper
    1/2 cup cranberries (mashed)
    1.5 cups reindeer dung
    1/2 cup melted whale blubber (1/2 cup melted lard or Crisco may be substituted)

    Mix above ingredients thoroughly and apply to erect penis.
    Cover with sock and plastic bag.
    Massage thoroughly up and down lenth of penis for 5 minutes. Remove bag and sock and thoroughly wash penis with warm soapy water.

    Do this once every 3 days for 30 days.
     
  10. Principessa

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    Roast Reindeer Recipe #150407

    Finnish dish, quite easy to make and great with spicy sliced potatoes or mashed potatoes.
    by Silver Spoon 1890
    1 hour | 10 min prep



    SERVES 4
    1. Thaw reindeer meat just so that the meat slices get loose of each other.
    2. Cut up the bacon slices.
    3. Roll the bacon slices in hot pan so long, that the fat melts. Add the reindeer meat and brown it lightly with the bacon.
    4. Add spices and beer/water. Keep it under a lid for about a half an hour.
    5. Prepare mashed potatoes, put it in a bowl and make a groove in the middle of the mashed potatoes. Pour the roast reindeer in it.
    6. Serve with cowberryjam.
    It's 3 AM I can't sleep and I spent most of Tuesday with my head feeling like a gyroscope. Please forgive my weird posts. :tongue:
     
    #10 Principessa, Dec 17, 2008
    Last edited: Dec 17, 2008
  11. kalipygian

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    The things you learn, reading NJQT.

    As reindeer are domestic animals, (unlike caribou) how is it that they come under the purview of ADF&G? Wouldn't it be agriculture, like cows?
     
  12. D_Brecock Evileye

    D_Brecock Evileye New Member

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    Male, female, who cares. They taste great!
     
  13. Principessa

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    NJQT466 wonders how many men took post #9 seriously and are now googling frantically looking for cheap sources of whale blubber. :lmao: :rofl:
     
  14. TonyHki

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    Reindeer is so my favourite meat in the world. Reindeer is a domestic animal, which is marked and lives in the wild. Once a year they collect them, catch them and slaughter them then, so that I can get the super good-tasting meat in the supermarket. One thing I have learned is that they are in fact very stupid and lazy.
     
  15. D_Ireonsyd_Colonrinse

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    awwwhh! You cold HEARTLESS people!

    Eating reindeer is like eating panda bear!!.... or eating a swan!!!

    (PETA needs to monitor this thread!)
     
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