Relationship Question

inkubus963

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Good morning Gang!

I have a question for persons who seek involvements and relationships with significantly younger persons. Not those illegally young, of course, but, for example, the 35 year-old who pursues those in the low-to-mid 20's as opposed to someone in a closer age group. My main curiousity applies to those who do this serially.

I must stress that I do not want to open a thread on judgements at all. I am sure I will need to clarify my interest as we proceed, and so will strive to have a response.
 

RideRocket

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So what is your question?

Without specifics to your question, it's hard to give you any feedback. My guess would be that those who do pursue those much younger
1. want to 'relive' some of their youthfulness
2. enjoy being the older/wiser 'mentor' and authority figure
 

Lex

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In my gay relationships, I enjoy the company of older men (5-12 years my senior has been the norm thus far).

90% of my gay buds are between 40-50. They are all good men who seem open to dating and loving a man of any age as long as he is responsible and able to commit.

There can be control/authority issues as Rocket pointed out and there are clearly some men who only want to date younger men. I find this to paralell hetero relationships where men are sometimes focused on younger women.

It's very complicated and I think people should be able to like what they like as long as they are aware and honest with themselves about WHY they like it.
 

inkubus963

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RideRocket said:
So what is your question?

Oh my god! Thanks for pointing THAT out! This is the end of my day, I'm tired, and I pulled the question so many times to re-word it, I forgot to put it back.
:pat: :oops:

You were correct, the basic question is, "What is the attraction?" I knew the question was potentially volatile, and I looked for a non-confrontational way to ask it, when I should have just been direct.
 

Gisella

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I trully want to know too why man are attracted to older woman...

In my personal experience since i was 10 smaller kids like me & little boys of 4 and 7 follow me around...i always tought because i had a maternal instinct ,give attention and like to protect...but in my adult life still, im 32 and younger man in their yearly & middle 20's like to be around me...

I do have a sweet and strong personality but would hate that young men were attracted to me because of authority & power issues...dont like that.

I prefer a man to be 5 to 8 y older than me.
 

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inkubus963 said:
I completely and unreservedly agree, I'm just curious as to those what those 'whys' are.

I am fully aware of why *I* like older men (and being aware of one's issues make them appear no less daunting) but I can't speak for older men who like younger men. I certainly don't see myself with someone significantly younger than me.

I just Googled and found a few links that might be helpful (I have not read them).

Age Difference in Realtionships

Age Disparity in Sexual Relationships (from Wikipedia)

Beyond Tops and Bottoms (pdf)


I hope these are helpful. Hit me up if want to discuss this more.
 

Gisella

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inkubus963 said:
Have you identified what is preferable about that age difference, Gisella?

For me this difference is more natural and men are "suppose" to be more mature and experienced than me...plus their bodies are aging at the same pace as mine...:tongue:

Its very important for me to learn with people...its an turn on for me my man to be mature and intelectually stimulated...dont like boyish stuff i like grown man.

For sure that are older man imature and younger more mature...still prefer they older than myself.
 

Gisella

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GoneA said:
excuse me if this sounds like i'm over-simplifying, but: meh - some like 'em older and some like 'em younger.

But..GoneA ,

Over-simplify as much as you want but say what do you prefer: younger or older ?

:tongue:
 

Gisella

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Yeh...run, run GoneA !!!

Lex is going there ! Better talk now....:eek:

GoneA u must be a Gemini or a Pisces...must be because they are 2...hehehe...:biggrin1:
 

Gisella

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Lex said:
Don't make me come over there.

Answer Gisella's question!

Wow Lex !!! with all due respect...you do look cool in the avatar...and it make us want to pull all the things in there...with all due respect...of course...
 

Ethyl

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inkubus963 said:
I completely and unreservedly agree, I'm just curious as to those what those 'whys' are.

I'm 36 and over the last couple of years, i've discovered I prefer dating men my age or younger, mainly because I find that older men tend to be "set" in their ways and have rather rigid expectations (probably due to having lived long enough to experience one or more bad relationships and being jaded as as a result). Younger men, on the other hand, seem to understand that it's a big world and variety is the spice of life. Age seems to be less of an issue for them than for the older men, relatively speaking.

Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a sweeping generalization, but my dating experience to date.
 

Gisella

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mercurialbliss said:
I'm 36 and over the last couple of years, i've discovered I prefer dating men my age or younger, mainly because I find that older men tend to be "set" in their ways and have rather rigid expectations (probably due to having lived long enough to experience one or more bad relationships and being jaded as as a result). Younger men, on the other hand, seem to understand that it's a big world and variety is the spice of life. Age seems to be less of an issue for them than for the older men, relatively speaking.

Disclaimer: This is not meant to be a sweeping generalization, but my dating experience to date.

Hmm Mercury you may are right about that and the older they become they can become more rigid and etc...

Very good point!
 

Lex

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Gisella said:
Wow Lex !!! with all due respect...you do look cool in the avatar...and it make us want to pull all the things in there...with all due respect...of course...

Thanks Gisella.

I have a caption for most pics of myself. The caption for this one is:

"Yank the harness, yank the jeans, or yank the jock..decisions...decisions..."



Also, GoneA is on the clock for needing to answer you! ;)
 

GoneA

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haha, lex.

i really don't have a preference either way; as long as the person is reasonably intelligent, things should go swimmingly. although, i would like for my date to not be too much younger.

and for a person who isn't picky, i've been dateless for quite some time ... not that i'm actually looking right now or anything.