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Religion and relationships

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by Kassokilleri2ff, Oct 23, 2008.

  1. Kassokilleri2ff

    Kassokilleri2ff Experimental Member

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    How important is it that the person you are in a relationship with is the same religion as you?

    As for me I'm athiest. It makes it very hard to be with anybody, since most people are at least a little religious and I assume most wont even want to bother with me when they find out about it. Which sort of just happened I think. This girl I showed her my myspace and of course it says "athiest" under religion, i hope she doesnt see it and think "oh hell no" and drop me because of it.
     
  2. cocktoberfest

    cocktoberfest Experimental Member

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    I am not religious and do not wish to be in a relationship with a religious person.
     
  3. cocktoberfest

    cocktoberfest Experimental Member

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    correction: is cock worship a religion? if so, I am very, very religious and go to church several times a day.
     
  4. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy Banned

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    I suggest you get religion, then, so you can bang this chick. Another good reason may be that "Lutheran" is easier for some people to spell than "atheist". :tongue:
     
  5. Principessa

    Principessa Expert Member

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    Jesus, Mary, and Joseph with all the other dating problems you have, you had to go and add atheist to the list! You're just a glutton for punishment. :frown1: Have you looked into Hinduism or Buddhism? The few people I've really gotten to know from those religions seem really nice and are rarely single.


    :rofl: :lmao: :rofl:
     
  6. crossy

    crossy Sexy Member

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    I would never consider an atheist or someone who worships Stan Musial
    to be hooked up with.
     
  7. invisibleman

    invisibleman Cherished Member

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    I am spiritual not religious. If I meet a person that is religiously devout and is needing me to change my beliefs towards his beliefs...I think that I would have to meet another man that is not needing me to change who I am to fit in his life. And there is nothing worse than a person who is religiously uptight and judgmental too. A man like that I would leave alone in a heartbeat.

     
  8. zygomatica

    zygomatica 1st Like

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    I am atheist and can't seem to understand how someone could actually believe in a higher power. So yes, like the OP, I find it extremely difficult to date someone who isn't an atheist. People who say, "Yeah I was raised (such-and-such) but don't (attend worship, etc. anymore), but I still believe in God (or a god of some sort)..." all I can think to myself is that they've never spent much time on the subject and must not be a very introspective, intellectually curious person, and that just scares me.
     
  9. oldriver

    oldriver Experimental Member

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    Religion is very important to me. I am a devoted atheist and I could never imagine myself in a relationship with anyone other than another devoted atheist. I have some christian friends -- they're fine to play golf and drink beer with once in a while -- but I could never see myself with them in any kind of a serious relationship. Stick to your principles!
     
  10. kingkhan

    kingkhan Experimental Member

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    I totally agree with you. As far as a romantic relationship I would find it hard to be with someone who was very religious.On the other hand my best friend is close to being a fundamentalist christian but, and it is fun to argue about religion with him but, that is just a friendship so the dynamic of the relationship is different. I don't think I could have a serious girlfriend who was religious though.
     
  11. Jovial

    Jovial Expert Member

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    Most people put the religion that their parents were or the religion they were raised. 50% of them don't believe in god, but like you they worry what other people will think. To me it is a turn-off if someone can't say what their true belief is. Just put non-religious, then find out when your potential partners believe when you met them.
     
  12. Kassokilleri2ff

    Kassokilleri2ff Experimental Member

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    The problem is not that i cant see myself with somebody who believes in god, its vice versa. They can't see themselves with me. I don't really care either way, if i limited myself to athiest girls then there would be almost abso-fuckin-lutey no way i would ever be able to date anybody. That woud be stupid. Its the girl not wanting me because im athiest is the problem.

    And i couldnt change myself either. I simply cannot believe in god, and I wont pretend to either just to be with a girl. I'm an extremely honest person, and i rarely if ever lie. Whoda thunk an athiest who cant lie or be dishonest? lolz. But doing that would mean me lying and being dishonest and i cant do that either.

    The girl im talking about, she is not super religious, she simply says that she belives in god but does not go to church or anything. It was not a conversation about the subject so i had not revieled that i was athiest. She was talking about her family or something and she said all that stuff. So as of yet i don't know what her reaction will be. If she scrolled down my myspace and saw the part that says "athiest" yet, i dont know. If she did, then good cuz shes still talking to me at the moment lol and has not asked any questions.

    Do you think i shoud ask her about it? What she thinks? I really like this girl and we talked about being more than just fuck buddies ya know?
     
  13. MarkLondon

    MarkLondon Sexy Member

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    Seems to me you're trying to find reasons this girl won't like you.

    Most people who say they're not religious but they believe in a god haven't thought very deeply on the subject and I don't think it's the most important thing to them whether you're atheist or not, as long as you're not a militant atheist who would try to change their ideas or mock them for their belief.
     
  14. Jovial

    Jovial Expert Member

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    Why do you say that? There are plenty of atheist women.
    Maybe she is willing to accept you and your beliefs here on earth and just accepts that you will burn in hell for eternity after you pass away.
     
  15. Kassokilleri2ff

    Kassokilleri2ff Experimental Member

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    lol thats a terrible thing to say!

    Anyways, i was just really scared for a bit that she would freak out. I'm a really nice guy, and I tend to make friends easily. But here in texas, I actually hung out with a couple religious friends of mine. They introduced me to other super religious people. After they found out i was athiest they wanted absolutely nothing to do with me and thought i was evil or something.

    That just goes to show how texas can be, its shitty as fuck! lol, i hate texas. Anyways, of course i dont hang out with peope who hate me because im athiest but i did try to get with a couple girls over a year ago who would not date me simply because i was and it really sucked.
     
  16. D_Chocho_Lippz

    D_Chocho_Lippz Account Disabled

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    Oh please. There are plenty of atheist that will drop people like there is no tomorrow when they find out that they are religious.

    Just like there are religious people who will Bible Thump you when they find out you are an atheist. And just like there are atheist will pull up their holier-than-thou-i'm-smarter-than-you-because-i-don't-believe in god bullshit.

    The road goes both ways bud. Remember that. (sorry, I get pissed off when people make such issues a one way street, when that is far from the truth).

    As for your original post.... what the hell is your problem? I agree with the poster above that you are trying to find ways for her to not like you. If you like her, then go for it. I am a MySpace fiend but I'm pretty sure I'm not going to fall head over heels over someone just over their MySpace profile. Hell, how many people do you know on MySpace where you can go to their page and go "damn, I know everything about them now." I know of nobody. Furthermore, it sounds like she breezed through your page, not studied it with a microscope so she could write your biography. I'm pretty sure that if you are a nice guy as you have stated, then she will go for you. Face it, humans like attention, especially women. Religion will (more than likely) never be brought up unless it truly is something that bothers you or her IMHO.

    In my life I have seen many people give up religion on a heartbeat OR take up religion in a heartbeat for a potential mate. Face it, religion or the lack of religion is pretty much irrelevant anymore. If her not liking you because of your beliefs is that big of an issue then man up, grab your coconuts, and ask her before you get too involved.

    If you are truly all tits up on finding an atheist girl or one who doesn't care about you being atheist then go to meetup.com and find a group where atheist gather. I am sure you will find someone there.

    And if you are an atheist, don't you think you should know how to spell it?

    (Sorry for my tirade. My life sucks ass and last night was a shitty night at work).
     
  17. B_some1

    B_some1 Banned

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    I have to agree with a fair portion of the above. It goes both ways. I don't post much but I felt I could shed some light here. I'm Catholic and so are my siblings. My mother is Catholic but my dad isn't religious. Some peoples comments make it seem as if my parents being together is an impossibility. Does my mom wish my dad was religious? Of course. Does he wish we weren't? You bet. But we still love eachother and are a family. In the end we still have respect for eachothers choices which far outweighs the urge to 'prove' ourselves right about the existance of God.

    Having parents that are split in belief is not a bad thing either. I had a choice of what I wanted to believe. Now I come to read things like this and I get offended when people take shots at those who are and aren't religious 'cause its either my mom or dad being called an idiot.

    It just makes me sad that we live in a world in which people get so worked up over these issues and fail to see the human factor in all of this. Oh and no, none of you are justified in taking shots at an atheist because atheists take shots at religion or vice versa.

    So a person loves you, work around that they snore, talk to much and are going to be in church on sunday. But then again I'm used to all this so may be its harder for others, I'm just saying have an open mind about people, don't shut them out over religion right away.
     
  18. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink Banned

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    Who? I'm someone who considers themselves atheist and I don't worship anyone.
     
  19. B_Nick4444

    B_Nick4444 Banned

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    no decision is actually made on my part

    there's just a basic feel to a person

    without having been told someone is an atheist, I can feel a basic, fundamental aversion and repulsion
     
  20. D_Joseba_Guntertwat

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    I've only ever met one person online who saw my "atheist" status and freaked out (it was on Facebook during a game of Scrabulous, and I assumed she was brainwashed or uneducated). Maybe things are harder in the US, but I'm sure there are tonnes of unbelievers out there.

    I wouldn't mind dating someone religious as long as it didn't affect her behaviour. I once dated a girl who asked what religion I was and I told her I was raised Catholic but now I'm atheist. She said "well, you've been baptised so you're Catholic", which pissed me off so much that I spent the next half hour arguing with her about the right to choose your own religion. I think she was one of the brainwashed, rather than the uneducated. Although she was Hungarian, it was hard to tell due to the language and cultural barrier. She was hot though, such a shame.
     
  21. B_bi_mmf

    B_bi_mmf Banned

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    As an atheist who finds religion to be totally ridiculous, and for the most part harmful, it is sometimes difficult to respect people who cling to myth as if it were reality.

    I certainly can appreciate why people whose existence is totally hopeless and miserable (e.g., slaves in the U.S.) would need to convince themselves that there is an afterlife. But I am much less sympathetic to well-educated people today who enjoy the freedoms, opportunities, and high standard of living in prosperous Western countries.

    At the same time, it is important to cut believers some slack, because many of them are the victims of severe indoctrination and piled-on guilt from a very early age. Richard Dawkins has described the way that religious people raise their children as a form of child abuse, and I agree.
     
  22. B_Think_Kink

    B_Think_Kink Banned

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    I really like your point of view. Especially the bold part.
     
  23. Jovial

    Jovial Expert Member

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    This is such a turn off to me that someone would just pretend to be a certain religion just to get along. So fake. Would their partner actually believe that they truly believed the new religion?
     
  24. Kassokilleri2ff

    Kassokilleri2ff Experimental Member

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    Anyways im not a jerk who bashes people for being religious. Thats dumb I'm sorry. You can neither prove nor disprove the existance of god, so its pointless to even bother arguing the cause.

    I just wanted to know how important religion is to people. Being in a town where most people are religious and there are more churches per square mile than anywhere else in america, my experience with these people is that they refuse to accept athiest whatsoever. So i wanted to get a wider view, obviously everybody here is from all over the world. You also tend to see alot of athiest in online forums. Its a broader view thats for sure.

    But whatever, I think I will try to talk to her about it. Although it will be hard and ill be scared shitless, it will be better to see how she feels now, rather than fall in love with her and then get my heart broken later.
     
  25. D_Chocho_Lippz

    D_Chocho_Lippz Account Disabled

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    Sorry Kass, I have to hijack your thread and address this issue real quick....
    I find this offensive and disgusting quite truthfully. Just because someone believes in a higher power you think they are harming themselves and that they am no longer worthy of your respect???

    Shit.....

    This type of atheist attitude is exactly why many people view atheists as jackasses. You ignore the good that religion has done and stereotype it as "all evil." Furthermore, you treat believers, of all different types of religion as people with some sort of mental illness. Great. Your view is narrow and not free my friend. Everyone has a right to choose what they believe, no matter how silly it may seem to you. That is true coexistence.

    So, with all due respect... go screw yourself you elitist prick.

    I truthfully think that there is more to this whole religion thing for you. Are you secure in your beliefs? If so, then quit caring about what others think about them. Move on. I don't care if you live in the Bible Belt or highest church per acre - everyone can't be a Bible Thumper there. There is going to be someone there that has compatible beliefs with you. Even if someone goes to church it doesn't mean they are just totally embossed with religion. There are many people who go to church just because it is a social gathering and could care less about "God" or worshiping. Others may just go because it is easier to go than to argue with their families. Hell, there may even be people that go just so they can laugh at the sermons and how "stupid" Christians are. Point is, we are all humans and on any given issue we all are different to some degree. Nothing really is a black and white issue and religous beliefs are no exception. Who knows, maybe this said gal really doesn't like religion and would love to hear you talk about how wrong it is.

    But yeah, talk to her man. Even if religion is important to her and she doesn't want to be with you, you probably still could be friends as it sounds like you already are. I hope everything goes well for you.

    Let us know how the talk went.
     
  26. D_Chocho_Lippz

    D_Chocho_Lippz Account Disabled

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    I agree. But it happens all the time... in both directions.
     
  27. JP0724

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    I can totally relate to this topic.

    I have been with my partner for about six years now, and it's a big struggle in our relationship. He is an Atheist and I am a Christian. I believe that we are all created in gods image and that he loves all of his children, and my partner just refers to me going to church as me going to visit my imaginary friend.

    We work it out though, we joke about it, and just move on. He lives his spiritual life the way that he wants to and I live mine the way I want. If a girl is interested in you, then she will not worry about what your beliefs are.

    It's tough for us because I want to teach our kids our Jesus and the Christian religion, and of coarse my partner wants no part of it, so it's tough on that front, but we are working it out. You'll be fine, just stay positive and focus on what you like about each other.
     
  28. kingkhan

    kingkhan Experimental Member

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    That would be tough to raise children when you both have different religious views that's why I would find it hard to be a serious relationship with someone who was religious. Maybe you could compromise someway like teach kids both sides. In my opinion it would be better to let the children make a decision on what religion(or no religion) they wanted to follow when they grow up. Children are not capable to determine the answers of complex questions: like is their a God?
     
  29. whatireallywant

    whatireallywant Experimental Member

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    I tend to put "Non-religious" or "Other" on my MySpace and other stuff. Facebook actually has what I actually am as a choice though - Unitarian Universalist.

    I'm ok with people being any religion or no religion, as long as they are not fundamentalists or pushy about it (that goes for pushy atheists too...)
     
  30. whatireallywant

    whatireallywant Experimental Member

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    He could look into Buddhism, but from what little I know about Hinduism, you cannot "become" a Hindu. You're either BORN Hindu or you are NOT Hindu.
     
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