Has anyone ever felt so repulsed with your man's choice of an X fuck buddy that your actually turned-off by them? Geez my guy had relations with a real sleezy cheap girl who is obviously permiscuious with other guys. I'm really so turned off by her so much that I'm reluctant to let him near me. I don't have any STD's and I think she is dirty. Can anyone give me some tips on how to stop feeling this way.
While I can understand being turned off by someone's choice of sexual partners, it's really something you need to weigh against your other emotions. You cannot control who he has been with. And just because she's acts slutty now, are you sure she did when he was having sex with her? One of my previous "fuck buddies" was far from "generally" slutty (she acted slutty to
me, but I was also the only person she was having sex with ... and she didn't let that side of her show to others until after we parted ways) when I was with her, but I can't exactly say the same about her now. One of the things that I thought was so amusing when I was with her was that she was such a good, innocent girl to everyone else... and I felt like I knew her dirty little secret, that she was a freak. At the time, she really was a good girl (I'm hoping that, in a forum like this, there's a void of people who seriously think girls forfeit their "good" status if they decide to indulge in sex). I don't know what happened after I was done with her... I moved off to college, and now she's ... a little different. She's had one boyfriend (who she's still with, for some crazy reason...) since me... and she's cheated on him with ... i think she's over the 17-person mark now.
Looking at her now, hell... I could completely understand if a girl wouldn't want to be associated with me based on the fact that I'd been with a girl like her..... but the simple truth is that, when I was playing around with her, she wasn't ... what she is now. So, consider that possibility.
But that's not really the big issue....
Disclaimer-- the following is very much a generalization, and very much based on stereotypes; I am not claiming to speak for all guys, and fully recognize that the content below will be highly contrasted to some guys.
You have to understand that guys have
very dirty minds. We grew up watching porn since before we could even cum, in many cases, and we have years and years of porn-induced fantasies rolling around in our heads-- fantasies we sometimes don't even feel right telling girls about. Fuck buddies are ... fuck buddies for a reason. They hold that distinction-- a distinction
not indicative of emotional attachment --because they are
not people we care about, or in some cases even
like that much. Fuck buddies serve one purpose: sexual pleasure. Take a guy, with all of his perverted fantasies, and give him a slutty girl willing to fulfill them ... what do you expect? We only grew up our whole lives fantasizing about possibly ever experiencing the things going through our heads... so yeah, sluts can happen in our history. No, we don't set out to marry them... we let them serve their purpose. Sluts like sex and various different kinds of it; one of the ways sluts are distinguished is by a willingness to do things most "proper" and "classy" girls wouldn't. Guys have all of their fantasies surfing around in their heads.... it's a perfect match. A sleezy fuck buddy to carry out your fantasies, then move on.
So there's a (very stereotypical, i know) little bit of explanation, if it helps at all. But as for advice, you just need to accept peoples' pasts. Or don't ask, if you can't handle it. You can't change the past, nor does it really concern you. If you're worried about STDs, then ask him to get tested. If you sincerely like the guy, than his sexual past shouldn't matter. It
is his past, isn't it? He's not with her for a reason, whatever that may be; what's to say he didn't learn his lesson and move up the chain a little bit? Whatever the case may be, you're wasting your time relishing on it. So you don't like sleezy girls, okay, fine... accept that, move on. I think you'd be better off if you just sat down with yourself, chose an action, and commited to it. Relishing on the past isn't going to do anything. You have a choice to make: either accept it and move on, or accept that you
can't accept his past, and ... move on. Either way, you need to move on, whether
with it's him or without.
Good luck...