Revealing the Truth about the Bible (MUST READ)

Discussion in 'Et Cetera, Et Cetera' started by B_Hamadim, Oct 24, 2009.

  1. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    The Holy Bible, as called the word of God, contains of Incest and Pornography, it describes God as an animal, it also pictures him in the worst attributes, including the utterance of some Absurdities that is beyond the imagination, In this topic, I will be proving to you that the Holy Bible is not the word of God, but the word of the Devil.



    This topic is directed to our Christian Brethren, Everyone is welcomed to share his thoughts and opinions.

    I had to cut this Into 6 Parts because of the “10000” Characters per Post.



    Part 1



    1-Absurdities.

    (A) A TALKING ASS Numbers 22:27-28


    Do you believe in a Talking Donkey?


    (B) Four Legged Chickens Leviticus 11:20


    KFC must be better informed about this.


    (C) Birth of Females is a Double Pollution Leviticus 12:1, 2, 5


    What are the Bible taking women for? Zombies?


    (D) Shamgar (Jew) Kills 600 Palestinians with an Ox goad Judges 3:31


    Terrorism at its best.


    (E) Samson (Jew) Kills a 1000 Palestinians with a Jaw bone of a donkey Judges 15:15-16


    Again, Terrorism at its best.


    (F) A SEVEN HEADED Leopard Revelation 13:1-2


    The Father in the heaven is a Seven headed leopard.


    (G)To eat Shit and to drink piss 2 Kings 18:27 and Isaiah 36:12


    Let us Recycle our Shit and piss and be Eco-Friendly, shall we?


    (H) DUNG on your Faces Malachi 2:3


    Christmas of that time?


    (I) To eat Cake with Shit Ezekiel 4:12-15


    They were Ignorant about the Difference between the Chocolate and Shit!


    (J) Samson (Prophet) has sex with a whore in Gaza Judges 16:1
    (K) Ruth (Prophet) Cohabits with Boaz in the barn Ruth 3:4-15
    (L) David (Prophet) sleeps with a young virgin 1 Kings 1:1, 3


    I love it when Prophets do such things, let us all be like them!

     
  2. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Part 2





    2-Basterds (Illegitimate Children).

    (A) All Basterds will not Enter the Kingdom of Heavens Deuteronomy 23:2
    (B) Those who without Discipline are Basterds Hebrews 12:8



    The second one makes me a Basterd, therefore I am not going to the heavens.



    3-The Uncircumcised must be killed.

    The Uncircumcised to be CUT OFF (To be killed) Genesis 17:14



    That means %90 of LPSG Population will Disappear.






    4-David (Prophet of God).

    (A) David had sex with Bath-Sheba, the wife of Uriah 2 Samuel 11:4
    (B) David murdered Uriah, the husband of Bath-Sheba 2 Samuel 11:6-25



    What is the moral of that Story?




    5-Qualities ill-befitting God.

    (A) A "hissing" God Isaiah 5:26, 7:18, Zacharia 10:8


    The cows "Moo", The cats "Mew", The Dogs "Bark", The Snakes "Hiss" and God? He also Hisses.


    (B) A "roaring" God Isaiah 42:13, Jeremiah 25:30


    ROAR!!!!!!!


    (C) A barber God Isaiah 7:20


    God will shave my pubes with a hired razor, I will also instruct him to shave my balls.


    (D) A "penitent" God Jeremiah 15:6, Genesis 6:6


    Emo? Razor across the Hands?


    (E) A God "riding" a Cherub 2 Samuel 22:11


    It seems that God couldn’t afford a Private jet nor a Helicopter, He rides a 10 year old female Angels on their backs, YEEEHAAA!!!


    (F) A God who murders 50,070 for looking into a "Holy Box" 1 Samuel 6:19


    Wow, what a sadistic God he is, I bet he had a condom in that Box.
     
  3. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Part 3




    6-Big Contradictions.

    (A) "No man hath seen God at any time" John 1:18
    (B) "God whom no man hath seen, nor can see" 1 Timothy 6:16
    (C) "And he (God) said: Thou canst see my face for there shall no man see me, and live" Exodus 33:20

    Contradicted by:

    (A) "And the lord spoke unto Moses face to face, as a man speaketh unto his friend" Exodus 33:11
    (B)"And they (Moses, Aaron and seventy others) saw the God of Israel" Exodus 24:10
    (C) "And Jacob called the name of the place Peniel for I have seen God face to face, and my life is preserved" Genesis 32:30



    7-God is a Stripper.

    God showed his ass to Moses: "And I (God) will take away my hand, and thou shalt see my back parts (Buttocks)" Exodus 33:23


    Wow! That proves that God is a homosexual! He was teasing Moses with his Tight Ass!


    8- Incest.

    (A) Incest between Father and his Daughters Genesis 19:33-35
    (B) Incest between Mother and her son Genesis 35:22
    (C) Incest between Fatherr-In-Law and Daughter-In-Law Genesis 38:15-18
    (D) Incest and Rape between Brother and sister 2 Samuels 13:10-14
    (E) Rape and Incest between Son and his Mothers 2 Samuels 12:11-12
    (F) Further Incest Leviticus 18:8-18, 20:11-14 and 17-21


    What is the moral of telling stories of Incest in the Book of God?
     
  4. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Part 4




    9-Jesus as "Grumpy".

    (A) "Ye hypocrites..." Mathhew 23:13
    (B) "Ye wicked and adulterous generation..." Matthew 12:39
    (C) "Ye whited sepulchers..." Matthew 23:27
    (D) "Ye generation of vipers..." Matthew 23:33


    Snow white? Anyone?


    10-Jesus calls his mother "WOMAN".

    Jesus calls his mother "WOMAN" John 2:4, the same manner in which he addressed a prostitute John 8:10.


    Is it because at that time they didn't have a word for "Mother"?


    11-Jesus a "God".

    (A) Jesus as a powerless God: "I can of mine own self DO NOTHING..." John 5:30
    (B) Jesus as a thirsty God: "(Jesus) saith: I thirst" John 19:28
    (C) Jesus as a weeping God: "Jesus Wept" John 11:35
    (D) Jesus as a tempted God: "Where he (Jesus) stayed forty days, being tempted by Satan" Mark 1:13


    He was also Circumcised when he was 8 days old.




    11-Jesus as a Racist (Sent to Jews Only).

    (A) Matthew 10:5-6
    (B) Matthew 15:24-26


    That sounds cool.
     
  5. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Part 5




    12-Polygamy at its Best.

    Solomon (Prophet) had 700 wives and 300 concubines 1 Kings 11:3


    I am mostly sure he had a 100 penises attached to his Body.


    13-Sodomy: The Bible's reason why human beings become lesbians and homosexuals.

    "Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshipped and served the creature more than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen, For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature(Beastiality): And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another(Homosexuality); men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet." Romans 1:25-27


    Of course I don't believe in that.


    14-Slavery: Allowed by God.

    "And ye shall take them (The Slaves) as an inheritance for your children after you, to inherit them for a possession; they shall be your bondmen for ever: but over your brethren the children of Israel, ye shall not rule one over another with rigor." Leviticus 25:46


    Anyone would like to Buy me as a Slave?
     
  6. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Part 6




    15-Inequality for Women.

    (A) Women are forbidden to open their Mouths in the Church.

    "...for it is a shame for women to speak in the Church" 1 Corinthians 14:34-35

    (B) To chop off her hands for saving her husband's life

    “This is what you must do when two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from the man who is beating him. If she tries to stop the fight by grabbing the other man's genitals, cut off her hand. Have no pity on her.” Deuteronomy 25:11-12

    (C) Her Husband to rule over her Genesis 3:16
    The head of the woman is the man 1 Corinthians 11:3
    Man can sell his daughter Exodus 21:7


    I feel bad for the Christian women...



    16-Treating Swine (Pigs) as Parasites.

    (A)Jesus forbid the eating of Swine flesh Leviticus 11:8

    (B)Jesus destroyed 2000 pigs to heal one man Mark 5:13



    Was he trying to stop the H1N1 of that time?


    I must apologize, I had to break this into 6 parts, It took me around 10 hours to gather and Organize the Information for you.
     
  7. SR_Blarney_Frank

    SR_Blarney_Frank New Member

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2009
    Messages:
    397
    Likes Received:
    2
    This is silly.
     
  8. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1

    I agree with you, The Bible doesn't stop there, there are dozens and dozens of things that I didn't mention here.
     
  9. Industrialsize

    Staff Member Moderator Gold Member

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2006
    Messages:
    24,279
    Albums:
    2
    Likes Received:
    2,095
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    United States
    I'm curious, what exactly do you hope to achieve with this post?
     
  10. DaveyR

    DaveyR Retired Moderator
    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2006
    Messages:
    11,908
    Likes Received:
    8
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Northumberland
    This perhaps? :rolleyes:
     
  11. D_Portelay Porquesword

    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2008
    Messages:
    3,107
    Likes Received:
    5

    Waits.... :popcorn:
     
  12. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2008
    Messages:
    2,933
    Likes Received:
    3
    hmmmmm. i fear this is going to cause a bigger argument than the pizza hut v dominoes debate
     
  13. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    Nothing except the Truth, Did I mention that I am an atheist?
     
  14. DiscoBoy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2009
    Messages:
    2,706
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Here's a site that points out a host of issues with the Bible, the Quran AND the Book of Mormon. It's a twofer + 1!

    I always knew those lesbians were a whole other breed.:rolleyes:
     
  15. DiscoBoy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Apr 28, 2009
    Messages:
    2,706
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Dominoes, hands down.:wink:
     
  16. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    I would like all the Christians on this website to read this, If you know a LPSG member who would like to enlighten us with his Great thoughts, then please send him the URL of this page.
     
  17. Pye

    Pye
    Verified Gold Member

    Joined:
    Jun 17, 2005
    Messages:
    828
    Albums:
    1
    Likes Received:
    58
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Rhode Island, USA
    Verified:
    Photo

    Perhaps that anyone trying to use the bible to justify any argument should learn what the bible actually says. ie

    homosexuality
    marriage
    war
    the benevolence of god

    it is a collection of stories that some people called fact and created religions
     
  18. Flashy

    Gold Member

    Joined:
    Feb 27, 2007
    Messages:
    8,097
    Likes Received:
    3
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    at home
    Shamgar did not kill 600 Palestinians...he killed 600 *PHILISTINES*...and he did it after the Philistines *INVADED* from the west.

    Samson killed Philistines as well.

    and no, the current "Palestinian Arabs", are not, the descendants of the Philistines.

    they are arabs.


    neither was "terrorism"
     
  19. D_Andreas Sukov

    D_Andreas Sukov Account Disabled

    Joined:
    Oct 6, 2008
    Messages:
    2,933
    Likes Received:
    3
    Dominoes is tastier but pizza hut is cheaper.
     
  20. B_Hamadim

    B_Hamadim New Member

    Joined:
    Jun 12, 2009
    Messages:
    474
    Likes Received:
    1
    I love it when we Rationalize this, Thanks for correcting me, sir.

    Philistines, so be it.
     
Draft saved Draft deleted