Romancing, being romanced, manners

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by ClaireTalon, Jul 3, 2006.

  1. ClaireTalon

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    There's a very weak spot on me, I guess. Besides my permanent craving for a well-endowed, athletic guys, I have a very weak spot for guys who know how to romance me the way I like it.

    I guess I'm not alone with that, in fact I guess the majority of women except for some exceptions likes to be romanced. I'd say it is the ultimate long-time key to my bedroom, while I don't take care of this so much with guys that are good for the quick once-over, someone who has manners and knows how to treat me right can be sure to expect more invitations, to be let in deeper than usual. And of course, following my quid pro quo, he can be sure that it will pay off in the treatment and treats I offer.

    About being romanced, I like it a lot if someone knows the details. Often I catch myself being surprised how many of the small gestures, and small details have gotten lost. Of course, you could say they don't count, it's the idea, but seeing the idea being executed with all the small details and facettes of it is something too, isn't it? Yet I disapprove of affected manners, and I'm very capable of detecting those. Nonchalance is the key, if they are casual, or off the cuff, that really gets my attention.

    I have little doubts I'll find many women on here who'll disagree with my views. But I'd like to learn about the details - what gets your attention?
     
  2. pichulon

    pichulon New Member

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    What a surprise....:eek: !!!
    I thought of you as a "hands on the job" no nonsense woman.
    But I always knew it, no woman, ever , can resist to a charming man. One by one, those defense mechanisms fall, if the right man moves in.
    Good to know, we are all human.
     
  3. Gisella

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    "What get my attention"...

    For sure good manners, brains, natural charms...men who really enjoy women...for me nothing to do with candles & eating, flowers and blabla...:tongue:

    Men who are confortable to express, dare to express emotions, know how to touch, look, exchange with me 'right' (my right of course...) playful man, enjoy to play roles (Tarzan, James Bond and etc)...passionate man but not suffocating men or the ones who goes by books (the ones that teaches blablablas..) bcause some stuff there do not work for me...and i appreciate the effort but if look fake it is fake - and will not last...

    Spontaneaty, criative, imagination and very sensual men - earthy - (not wordly man)...but must be crazy adventurous too!
     
  4. Mr. Snakey

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    :smile: Yes its the little things that a guy can do that matter Holding the door for a lady sending flowers etc Great thread!!!:cool:
     
  5. dong20

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    If it's what you like how is it a weakness?

    Traditional 'romance', the chocs and flowers stuff....not my style, at least not beyond role playing. Romance for me is almost exclusively cerebral, the right words, and the wrong words (in the right circumstances) combined with spontaneity, a desire to please on a personal not a formulaic level is exqusite, but only once the initial interest is already there. Manners, like respect are de rigeur and no amount of romance can compensate for their absence.

    Purely as a means of getting my interest, it's probably doomed to failure. For me there has to be that indefinable 'spark' and to my mind at least, 'romance' plays no part in that. As you can tell I don't believe romance is gender specific.

    Put it this way; having a box of matches is one thing, but you have to know how to use them to start a fire.
     
  6. dongalong

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    You hear about "nice" guys not getting layed, even though they might do the things you mentioned.
    what does the romantic "nice" guy do wrong compared with a normal romantic guy who would get layed?
     
  7. D_Coyne Toss

    D_Coyne Toss New Member

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    Romance in one of the most important features i a relationship.

    Men have to be able to say "I love you with all my heart" and to demonstrate it in several ways: a candlelight dinner, a walk in the moonlight, a kiss under the pouring rain.

    I love cuddling my gf, caressing her face and her eyes, kissing her for long. And what about hearing her heart beating with mine?

    Anyway, each couple has its own romance, the secret is creating it and never forget it, especially in difficult moments. When it seems like nothing can lift your love anymore, cling to romance, and you'll find the way.
     
  8. Hefty

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    Attention is nice, but I think it should work in both directions. How many women romance their men? For me, it's a complete turn-off when a woman expects to be treated like a princess. The ability to open one's soul to another human being is what is important; to let the other person know that you are special to them. But it has to work both ways. And of course, this goes for same-sex relationships as well.

    I've never understood how a woman can call herself emancipated and egalitarian but still somehow expect to be put on a pedestal in the old-fashioned way simply because of her gender.
     
  9. naughty

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    Hefty,

    I do hear you. Selfishness is a turn off in either sex. I think it is ideal when both parties think more for the other person's happiness than they do for themselves.










     
  10. fratpack

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    Claire, a man would be a fool not to wine and dine you and romance you right.
    I agree with you about falling for the well endowed strong athletic guys though often times they fall short in the romance department.
    It is all about the details but what I also look for is not just how he treats me but how he treats others. For me that is a true test of his character, sure he treats me nice to get into my pants but if he disrespects others from waiters to elders, then he is not for me. Romance and manners need to be consistent but with me coming out the winner.
     
  11. Gisella

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    For sure must work both ways...and men have to express his romance language for us to know it, bcause everybody is different...and more we get to know more we adapt to their tastes...like they do to us...romance language is very personal!

    Well, 'self emancipated' woman that i know, craves romance too...the reality of most emamcipated women that i know are working class..they work hard, pay the bills, many have kids and raised them by themselves, have no good health care or day care for kids and blablablas...they are not profissional emancipated women that does not live from pay check to pay check...well, they crave romance coming from a nice decent guy...'pedestral' is a very lonley place to be i think..in my head just the 'rich & famous' can afford that..but still soooo boring....in my view of course...

    Well, i still think some people in some rich coutries complicate to much simple things...of course we are different genders and dont know why we have call 'old fashion or gender issues' with we like romance! Romantics for me are rebels..yeh! REBELS idealists...free to express emotions and feelings deep and deeper without care if someone will put us in a box of "isms"...

    Hefty...i understand when u say about the both way romancing bcause is just fair and true to give and receive..but to me makes no sense the second paragraph...( i dont know what is elegatarian means too...):redface:

    But anyways..im from another culture...:rolleyes:
     
  12. B_Hickboy

    B_Hickboy New Member

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    Hi. My name is Lennie. Come here often?
     
  13. Ethyl

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    The best surprises spring to life when two people feel free to reveal themselves, slowly peeling the layers back one by one.

    That is the ultimate romance.
     
  14. JoeNeckbone

    JoeNeckbone New Member

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    tHE WOMAN SHOULD ALWAYS COME FIRST in a relationship. The man should be 100% responsible for her complete satisfaction. ROMANCE IS EROTIC. Sexual intercourse begins long before any contact is made. It begins in the mind. Your mind being your most important sex organ. Imagination is critical. The first rule of love is to listen. Seek to understand before asking to be understood. Mutual penetration of emotions detonates explosive orgasmic sex bombs. Timelessness is always my goal.Passion. Meltdown.
     
  15. pichulon

    pichulon New Member

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    To be truly romantic, with each other , the word " expectation" has to be erased from the common vocabulary.
    Expectations make us build a pattern that ,we happen to believe , our beloved one " should " follow.
    That kills romance, because there is no way to predict the actions of another person, and, what we end up doing , is , the building of an anteroom to dissappointment.
    While, if both parties to the couple give , and give to one another, without consideration in return, without "expectations" about the other person, only then, true romance and true fullfilment develops.
    When we give, without expecting , we make someone very happy , and, that happiness, wakes up in that significant other, the will to give....
    No need to expect , no need to ask. Where there is no spontaneity to give , there is a problem , unevenness.
    ... finally , I do not want to receive what I already "expected".
    I want to be surprised by the unexpected, which is the ultimate romantic and spontaneous high.
     
  16. ClaireTalon

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    Don't get wrong expectations, boy. Maybe I'm more nonsense than you think, but there are always two ways to get through fortified defenses. One has to do with mortars and tanks, the other way utilizes a silenced gun.

    I don't think romance comes in words. Instead of plastering me with 100 "Love you" notes a day, written, said or strewn on my living room rug with rose petals, which are terrible to get away there, talk about plucking by hand. If he says it once and I feel that he means it, it has just a lot more impact with me.
     
  17. Lordpendragon

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    Clare - I'd like to see you try to drink me under the table.
     
  18. ClaireTalon

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    If you'll try that, I guess you'll see two Claires drinking you under the table. ;-)
     
  19. Lordpendragon

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    Is that such a bad thing? I think I could handle two of you.
     
  20. Lucitrue

    Lucitrue New Member

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    Joe, you hit it on the head for me.. Eroticism, romance, Sex all begin in the mind.. You have to set the table and cook the meal before you can eat.. Who likes cheap ass carry out anyway??:biggrin1:
     
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