Room mates

Discussion in 'Relationships, Discrimination, and Jealousy' started by actioncfc, Dec 14, 2007.

  1. actioncfc

    actioncfc Active Member

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    Anyone have a cool room mate? My roommate is nice, but way to uptight. He is a great room mate (pays bills on time, clean, quiet). I have seen him in boxers twice on 6 months, never talks about sex or masturbation (I don't bring it up often LOL) and never brings home a "friend". I come from a unmodest family. My room mate and I have different schedules so we never see eachother that much. If he were to leave work early though he could be in for a surprise. Former room mates were into porn, sex talk, and nudity. Have you had similar experience or the total opposite (sharing women). I can't figure my room mate out.:mad:
     
  2. mountainguy

    mountainguy New Member

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    I'd be thankful that he pays his bills on-time and is clean and quiet. I've previously had roommates who refused to do all of three of those things.

    As for the other issues, some people are more comfortable being about their sexuality than others. I've had roommates who were comfortable with various levels of undress, but never any who were openly into porn.
     
  3. Tristessa

    Tristessa New Member

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    All I know is I'm glad I now live alone, as sex with non-involved roommates/flatmates isn't the best idea especially when you want to kick them out later . . and I've managed to make that mistake with my last 3 . . :tongue:
     
  4. saturn

    saturn New Member

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    realise that everybody is different! probably he`s just shy or doesn`t like you, so he`s not speakin`with you :smile:
     
  5. B_josiah852

    B_josiah852 New Member

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    How many times has he seen you naked ? How many times have you left the bathroom naked to walk into your bedroom so he could see ? He may just be waiting or shy or maybe he isn't interested in seeing you naked ? Won't know until the subject has a chance to come up.
     
  6. Shawn777

    Shawn777 New Member

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    My roomie is similar--never talks about sex or anything sexual in nature. I've never caught him looking at porn or j/o but then again, we both have incredible work loads during the week so the moment we get done, we pass out and usually hang out in different crowds during the weekend.

    It's just how it goes. If you really wanted to get into anything sexual with him, that's up to you to figure out how best to go about that without rupturing your relationship.
     
  7. actioncfc

    actioncfc Active Member

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    Not into him sexually. Just it's the first rommie I have had that is not into talking like guys do. I don't mean best friends. We get a long great and his friends are cool, yet he does not bring anyone over for the night, no buddy talk of sex or talk of relationship problems.

    I have bad room mates. He is not a bad room mate. Just very introverted and very shy (more than me).
     
  8. Shawn777

    Shawn777 New Member

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    Well, you live in Palm Beach, so there must be plenty of opportunities to go out and do things together.

    Maybe you should invite friends over for a get-together and include him in on the festivities. That might bring him out of his shell a bit.
     
  9. Scorpiorising

    Scorpiorising New Member

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    You know, there is a difference between a roommate and a friend. It's sad to say, but a roommate relationship is akin to a business relationship. Sure, you need to have a harmony, but there is no rule that it be buddy buddy. It's just two people sharing a space and bills.

    I think it would be one thing if you had a person who was already a friend move in and they acted all weird, but I don't think you can expect someone you met from an ad or even through a mutual acquaintance to start chatting boyfriend/girlfriend problems and braid each other's hair while in your pajamas. Some people are more comfortable letting down those boundaries and can form friendships quick, but some people just want a place to live and don't want to be bothered.

    As for the sex thing . . . I've never had a guy for a roommate, but I did rent space with a girl with whom I went to high school. We were good friends before we moved in together. Because there was no clear definition between our friendship and roommate responsibilities, it ended up becoming strained (and we lived together for several years). In the beginning, neither of us had any problem with bringing home a boyfriend or . . . um . . . boyfriend. As the years went by, I would be careful only to bring over only a person I was having something serious with. She, on the other hand, continued to bring home every one night fling from some downtown bar. I'm no prude, but I started to become uncomfortable with never knowing who the hell's boots were in the living room of our condo when I got up for work. And, she would get loud. It just ended up being gross. That, and some of the unclear boundaries ruined our friendship.

    I guess what I'm trying to say (outside of self therapy for getting this out, LOL) is to be careful and respectful of your roommate. Respect his boundaries (whatever they may be) and expect the same in return. If he's private, he's private. If you'd rather live with someone you can be friends with, have a friend move in with you, don't expect this guy to fill that space.
     
  10. yhtang

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    Well said. Things should be put in perspective; it is often unspoken expectations of each other that causes conflict.
     
  11. zawfi

    zawfi New Member

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    You said "talking like guys do." Not all guys are comfortable talking about stuff like this. I seldom have been, whether with very close friends, or less, with roommates who weren't also close friends. I can probably count on one hand the people in real life, not online like this, who have heard me talk about "buddy talk of sex," other than off-color jokes or kidding and stuff like that.
     
  12. jazzz14

    jazzz14 Member

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    Hey buddy, I'm in North Palm Beach. AOL chat: JunoBeachGuy1 Yahoo: jazzz14
     
  13. Trigon

    Trigon New Member

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    When you can take a shit with your roommate in the shower or crap with no door, that's when you got a special roomie. I knew people who lived like this, and it was nothing for them.
     
  14. MagnumBoy

    MagnumBoy New Member

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    My roommate is a very cool guy. We were co-workers too but now we're just roommates. We double teamed a girl together recently, which I had never done before; it was a blast. I've never seen another guy go at it before. A week later, the girl brought two of her girl friends over, and my roommate invited his guy friend to come over. We all got drunk and my roommate and I started to make out with the girl in the living room. Being the cool guy he is, he let me have the girl, and my roommate and his friend took the two other girls upstairs to my roommate's room to give us some privacy and to try to get some for themselves from the two other girls, but apparently, they didn't, so my roommate and his friend watched me screw the girl in the living room. The lights were out, so she didn't know, but they were sitting in the dining room looking into the living room at me. It was surreal. They said it was one of the coolest things they have ever seen. Before my roommate came along, life was boring. It's not anymore!
     
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