On a more serious note from me than you're used to seeing. I've been doing a bit (make that quite a lot) of thinking and reading about safer sex practices lately. This for various reasons. I'm recently out of a longterm relationship (that was an open relationship - meaning we saw others both on our own and together - thus the existence of my current lovers) and moving out into the dating scene again. Just recently I've also seen a bit too high number of close friends hit by various STI:s (some active in the swinger's world like we were, some just "regular" people). Now - condom for penetrative sex has always been there for me - non-negotiable. It's been one occasion only, apart from my then longterm partner, when it wasn't there. With a lover since long time back (we're speaking over 4 years) that I knew was (and is) religious in his condom use with others and even that single occasion felt strange. I'm still seeing that lover today, and yes, we're using condoms - that was a one-time-never-again for both of us. He felt as strange about it as I did. That part of safe sex is in itself not too strange or complicated - very few (if anyone) reacts to the suggestion to use a condom for 'actual' sex - and if they do it's a surefire ticket out of my bedroom. But - and this is where I'm debating with myself. I know there is a (low, but still there) risk for STI transmission during oral sex too. Now, sucking, licking, stroking, eating cock (or pussy) is one of my favorite activities besides penetrating sex. Can't say that I much like the taste of condoms (flavored lubricants make it bearable - but that's about it), nor the feel of giving a blow-job with a condom - done it, don't really like it, neither has any of the partners I've done it with. How high that risk is? Well, that's what I can't find any indication on. Lower than unprotected penetrative sex, yes - but how much lower? Am I in reality putting myself at a risk that I would rather avoid if I knew the actual numbers? (Does anyone have any real statistics on transmission rates for various STI:s and oral sex? I haven't been able to find any and I'm usually quite good with Google). And from another perspective - i.e. the receiver - how would you react if a woman insisted on giving you oral sex only if you wore a condom? Would you do it but not enjoy it? Would you avoid oral sex altogether and concentrate on other sexual activities as it would give you nothing (or less than you want)? Would you avoid future contact as that's a bit too safe-and-sound (read: boring) and not a potential partner that you'd continue seeing? I'm not looking for politically correct answers. Nor for a decision on what to do. I'm looking for your gut reaction and thoughts around this. Also for discussion - whenever I'm mulling things over it helps me to get various viewpoints.