Salt N` Pepper look, is this really attractive/desirable?

Attila the Hung

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It sounds shallow, but if you combine the graying with relatively classy clothing and nice (not flashy) jewelry, you can easily emanate a sort of "I'm financially secure" vibe. Financial security has traditionally been the male role, and so coming across as responsible and with room for others in your finances is very manly and attractive to some women.

I think you are on to something there, however since I have no fashion sense to speak of and have always been mainly a jeans and T-shirt kind of guy I don`t think I can pull this off. Besides, I wouldn`t quite say that I am financially secure either, so to give off that kind of look and vibe would be falsely representing myself to an even greater extent than dyeing my hair would.

I don`t care much for jewelry either to be honest, the Germanic Iron Cross necklace around my neck is more than enough, although I do have a nice bracelet, ring and watch for special occasions but going out for a night out on the town ain`t a special occasion so I rarely ever wear them.
 

nudeyorker

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Attila whatever you decide will be the best option, because it's the best choice for your comfort level and how you look. (I took a peek in your gallery and think you look great)
I was also thinking about Matt Leblanc from friends, he was prematurely gray and the producers dyed his hair so that he more resembled the rest of the cast in age and style. I much prefer his Salt & Pepper look.
This whole question can be answered with How do you perceive yourself and how would you most like to be perceived by others?
I don't think it's a male or female issue but I remember when Cher had her hair colored in Moonstruck it did something to her characters attitude and self-esteem.
Another word of advice is go a colorist and talk with him/her at length about what your are going for (mainly that you don't want it to look like you have your hair colored) and how often will you need to have it touched up etc... If in fact you don't like the transformation you can cut your hair and let it grow out.
As I said before I'm really lucky... I'm blonde and if I spend a great deal of time outside I become really blonde; in the NY winter I become a dirty blonde and go and have highlights that hold me until summer or back to Honolulu whatever comes first.
If you decide to color your hair... take before and after photos.
Me ke aloha!
 

HFOStimmer

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I'm salt and pepper on the sides and beard but darker on top. I wish I still had my brown hair all over, but I prefer it to the fake look of coloring it.
 
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27 here noticing some grey already. I think guys look so hot with grey hair....the s&p look as long as its well kept is hot. The guy from mad men is an example and although I hate to mention his name Anderson cooper looks hot with it.
 

Attila the Hung

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Attila whatever you decide will be the best option, because it's the best choice for your comfort level and how you look. (I took a peek in your gallery and think you look great)
I was also thinking about Matt Leblanc from friends, he was prematurely gray and the producers dyed his hair so that he more resembled the rest of the cast in age and style. I much prefer his Salt & Pepper look.
This whole question can be answered with How do you perceive yourself and how would you most like to be perceived by others?
I don't think it's a male or female issue but I remember when Cher had her hair colored in Moonstruck it did something to her characters attitude and self-esteem.
Another word of advice is go a colorist and talk with him/her at length about what your are going for (mainly that you don't want it to look like you have your hair colored) and how often will you need to have it touched up etc... If in fact you don't like the transformation you can cut your hair and let it grow out.
As I said before I'm really lucky... I'm blonde and if I spend a great deal of time outside I become really blonde; in the NY winter I become a dirty blonde and go and have highlights that hold me until summer or back to Honolulu whatever comes first.
If you decide to color your hair... take before and after photos.
Me ke aloha!

Thank you for the detailed reply nudeyorker, I appreciate it. And if I do decide to dye my hair I will take before and after pics and post them on this very thread for all to see.
 

OscarM

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I like the salt and pepper look, but definitely so if and only if his appearance is "well-dressed" and "active-looking".

But yes, that financially secure vibe might be also a factor... who doesn't want to be financially secure anyway?
 

cdunstan1

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Dude, I started going grey when I was 19 (almost 22 years ago). Which is especially strange because I did not look my age and was carded for alcohol into my early 30's. I manage hiding it by keeping my hair really short and creative use of "product". Now I am very young for my position at work. Even though everyone knows I'm 40 the greys make them forget it.
4 things to consider:
- I'm in an 11 year relationship with a college jock 7 years my junior
- You are a very good looking man and can pull of premature greying
- A while back in Europe men used to dye their hair because it was the look (don't know if this is still true, haven't been there in several years
- PLEASE have any dye jobs done professionally. I know you have said you would but I do not know any man who has dyed his hair at home and not looked like he stuck his head in a vat of shoe polish!

Now I'm going to check out your gallery :smile:
 

blackbottom2

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Your post makes me feel that the issue here is not wether salt and pepper hair is attractive or not, (in my humble opinion it definitely is) but how some women's dislike dictates your own happiness and self confidence
Are they really worth trying to please because in the end if you make yourself miserable over it then it has a negative effect on you as an overall package and more of them would find you unattractive for that reason. Relying on their approval for your happiness is a sure fire way for let downs.
Best to just accept what you have and make the most of your positive features which are not always appearance related and enjoy yourself, life and the women you choose to share it with...... Fuck the others, their shallow views are worth diddly squat anyway
 
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Silvertip

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Same as you, Attila, I started going S & P in my twenties. In my forties I went from gray to white and have been that way ever since (attached pic for proof.) However I didn't have the graying chest hair issue, as I've never had any noticeable body hair. Throughout that progression I never got any feedback from the ladies that wasn't totally positive. Of course few, if any, gals of any class would ever say "Oh, yuk, a gray hair!" to one's face but I really have received a lot of positive feedback from the girls. I share your previously voiced feelings about just being who you are and not misrepresenting yourself, and for that reason I never gave a thought to doing anything about my rapidly graying hair. On the other hand, if you succumb to the urge to dye your hair, go for it! No harm done if you do, it's not like it's permanent or irreversible. But if you decide you like hiding the gray you'll have just added one more complication to your life, i.e. the need to maintain that look. Personally I'm sure I'd find it to be more trouble than it's worth.

.
 

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simbablk

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In high school, my gf's mom had the most beautiful salt/pepper hair the world, which consisted of only me, had ever seen! Loved it and complimented her hair all the time!

I think it it's very sexy.


Simba
 

oldredneck1

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There is a simple solution to your hair problem. You could try shaving your head and see how you look. Today you see men of all ages sporting shaved heads .If you do not like the shaved dome, it will grow back quickly.
 

StuJr

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My uncle's hair was completely white in his 20's. Looked great on him. But go ahead and dye, if it makes you feel better. As for misrepresenting, remember that women dye and wear makeup all the time. If they can misrepresent, than why can't we?
 

redneckgymrat

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I am a couple of months shy of 30 and I have more gray hair than most older men I know and work with who are in their 40s and 50s!!
...
Besides, for a man to dye his hair seems like a very vain and unmasculine thing to do in my eyes,
I started going gray in my mid twenties...and happily, since I'm blond, it wasn't too traumatic, but it was traumatic to me.

Gray, or preferably white hair, if it looks "intentional," in the form of salt and pepper or pure white swaths, looks fine on most men. It's an issue of getting older, and men get more distinguished with age. And men are supposed to be able to deal with the realities of our age.

Having said that, it doesn't mean that we have to do it, happily.

Hair dye is definitely one of the choices, and while you're right about it being vain, you obviously mentioned it for a reason. So, let's call it what it is, you (and me, too) *are* vain! Vanity may not be a virtue, but it *is* human nature.

But I would suggest you not try to "hide" the gray by dying it back to your original color. Invariably your skin color changes just a little bit, too, and it no longer looks natural. So, obscure it instead. Why not embrace the color...go for something radical, like highlights, frosting, or maybe bleaching it to platinum blond? USE the color to your advantage.

If you're going to do it, embrace it! Instead of pretending to be something, you'll be making a statement.

In my own case I chose something conservative. Since my gray hair was exclusively on my sideburns/temples, I put up with it for a while, and then got a haircut with whitewalls. Took 10 years off my appearance. Whitewalls are where you shave the sides to the skin. It's a classic look, and "got rid of" my gray, completely! :)
 
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CUBE

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Checked your pics out. First you are one handsome man OP and have a great body. I mean it. If you dye your hair it must be maintained and there is a cost. So money may be a factor. I actually think your grey hair looks hot. I would try touching up the beard. It may may more of a difference than you think with just the beard. I have a whiteish brown beard and carfully dye it each week. It looks realistic and takes years off me. It sharpens my features. But again, you are handsome as is
 

Attila the Hung

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I thank you all ladies and gents for taking the time to post your thoughts in my thread, your views and opinions are appreciated. As it stands I have decided to leave my hair as is, so the grey shall stay for the time being.