Saving yourself - a big mistake?

headbang8

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Pecker said:
I did that.

Was it worth the wait?

Yes.
Pecker, you know I love you madly. But I'm gonna take issue with you here.

You and your wife were virgins when you married, from your previous posts. You divorced. So how was saving yourself for the WRONG one worth it?

Or...were you not referring to your ex-wife?

I ask this question in a positive spirit, not a dismissive one. I really want to know.
 

D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

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Saving yourself for the 'right' person or marriage is fine as long as you dont think that is going to gaurentee a good and happy sex life, especially the first time.

Also how do you ever know that you have found the 'right' person..Many of people have though so and it has ended in regret and/or divorce, so is that considered as they havent saved themselves for their 'true' right person?

Ans im not a fan of forcing people to wait..ie religious beliefs, It should be an individuals choice not what is dictated to them by religion, family etc
 

Doc

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To everyone out there. Live and enjoy your life. As studhunter mentioned, there is no need to watch it pass you by. This might rub some the wrong way who have strong ideological beliefs. But my strong ideological belief is that life is meant for us to experiment in. So shoot me.
 

madame_zora

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I'd have to say "To thine own self be true". If someone holds such strong religous or idealogical beliefs that waiting seems like the right thing, then maybe it's the right thing for them.

I think that making it all the way to your twenties until you marry is difficult, and while you're going through your sexual development, it can actually cause problems in the form a divergances from healthier sex drives, but that's the chance you take. Learning to substitue something else for sex, or learning to feel guilty about your sex drive will last a life time, I wish more people would consider that. There are a lot of fucked up adults who still have not figured out that sex is okay and your drives are natural. Ever hear of the madonna/whore complex? It's pretty horrible stuff.

Everyone's time frame is different, but personally, I'd NEVER commit to someone in a relationship without knowing if we were sexually compatible. Sex is a very important part of a love realtionship, and just like I wouldn't marry someone without knowing their philosophical views, their politics, religous opinions- I also wouldn't jump in blindly not knowing how they are about sex. Seems like common sense. There are literally MILLIONS of sexless marriages out there, would you want to risk that?
 

Gisella

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madame_zora said:
Everyone's time frame is different, but personally, I'd NEVER commit to someone in a relationship without knowing if we were sexually compatible. Sex is a very important part of a love realtionship, and just like I wouldn't marry someone without knowing their philosophical views, their politics, religous opinions- I also wouldn't jump in blindly not knowing how they are about sex. Seems like common sense. There are literally MILLIONS of sexless marriages out there, would you want to risk that?

Yeh for sure never ever again want to live in a sexless relationship..its hell...just was hell to me. :rolleyes: