Say it's too big or ...

Discussion in 'Women's Issues' started by cason, Sep 19, 2008.

  1. cason

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    I recently asked a good friend I had sex with one time about our night together. It was something I always wondered about but had never asked her.

    We were really into each other and both excited about fucking each other but soon into me penetrating her, and I was taking it slow, she complained that she was in pain and we had to stop. She said at the time that she hadn't had sex in a while but I was left unsure as to whether it was as she said or something else. I'm not looking for 'big dick koudos' or affermation, honestly but it did occur to me that maybe she didn't want to say, 'hey, you're too big for me' because that would in effect end our relationship, at least sexually or at any rate it might make me feel awkward in her eyes. Bringing up the size of my cock was something I didn't want to do at the time. So I never really knew.

    My question is to the women on lpsg, have you ever been reluctant to tell a guy he's too big because you thought it would make things awkward or even impossible between you and how did you overcome this.
     
  2. ManlyBanisters

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    Nope - maybe you were just a bad fuck.

    Or maybe it was just one of those things - IME if a woman likes the guy enough she perseveres.
     
  3. cason

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    Well, I might be a bad fuck, that's always possible; but I'd like to think not.
     
  4. TheRob

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    that's kinda rude and extreamly near sighted
    I mean how many women have you been?
    one? that's hardly a complete understanding of every female mind on the planet
     
  5. Principessa

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    There is only one way to find out, come hither zero-million. :flirt: :boobies: I promise to tell you the truth. :wink:
     
  6. Drifterwood

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    :eek:

    Strumpet!
     
  7. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    You are not spending enough time getting your woman ready, not using enough lube and you are too rushed.
    There is a marked diffrence between a woman being horny and a woman being aroused.
    Keep your dick in your pants until she is wringing wet and you can insert at lest two to three fingers into her and she has cum, then ease your way inside "gently".
    Woman can get nervous seeing a bigger cock and hence unable to relax.
    Being tense tightens the muscles in her vagina and plays havoc with her ability to get moist.
    Prolonged kissing and stroking and not being in a all fired rush to close the deal will help.
     
  8. D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah

    D_Kay_Sarah_Sarah Account Disabled

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    What is it with guys and not believing :rolleyes: If she said its been a while then maybe that's all it is. Give her time to get used to riding the horse again.
     
  9. cason

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    Thanks for the advice all.
    I didn't really emphasize the fact in the original post but the sex we had was actually really good. There's so much more to sex than penis insertion and happily I love to spend time finding out what that means.

    So it's not really about not believing her or rushing her or any of that.
    I should have said originally that in our recent conversation she did say it was a size thing, but unfortunately because she lived in the US and I don't we didn't get long enough to get in tune with each other.

    The question is really about the idea that something one partner is afraid to mention could spoil a potentially good sexual relationship.
    Communication about all aspects of sex is key. I like, in fact I need to hear about everything my partner wants, needs, doesn't like etc..and vice versa. I love that honesty.
     
  10. The Dragon

    The Dragon New Member

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    The sex is good MISTER, when your lady is is bellowing her head off, the bed under you is soaked with her juices and she is begging for more and you come to dread the word "AGAIN".
     
  11. ManlyBanisters

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    And that's the question I was answering. I have never heard a woman say that she found a guy too big and didn't feel she could tell him about it. That's why I answered with a 'nope' - the bit about being a bad fuck was a flippant remark and it seems the OP took it as it was intended. :smile:
     
  12. curiomeerkat

    curiomeerkat New Member

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    Very well said Dragonfly!!! :biggrin1:
     
  13. cason

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    Agreed, no offense taken.:wink:

    I know I'm not a bad fuck. A bad fucker maybe, and when I fuck,... I'm BAAAAD!! lol:biggrin1:
     
  14. Jovial

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    I think it could happen. One girl commented on my size before sex, but didn't say anything when the penetration started. I could tell that maybe it was painful even though she didn't say anything. So I proactively stopped and applied some lube. After that she said it was better, so apparently it was a bit painful but she wasn't going to say anything.
     
  15. Maia

    Maia New Member

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    My husband was too big for me for several months before we learned the right tricks. If he just right pounds me I still get sore quickly, though. I didn't tell him he is too big for at least a year, because I felt very inadequate that I couldn't fit him. I felt like somehow probably other women could fit him without trouble, and if I told him that I could not he would be disappointed and look elsewhere for sex. Since then I have learned that a lot of women consider him too big, so essentially the answer is yes women are sometimes reluctant because we sometimes think it will negatively effect the relationship.
     
  16. cason

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    Exactly what I was getting at Maia, thanks for replying. It's important to be open as much and as soon as possible for me, and not just in bed, so that you can say what you like and deal with it instead of creating uncomfortable (sorry for the pun) moments where you start guessing "what is it?"
    Serious fucking is too good to mess around with. And any size penis can give pleasure used in the right way but even though I now have the confidence of being and knowing I'm a damned good lover I still need honest feedback, as do women. Then we're both getting into areas where we can REALLY get off. The sort of sex where you lose weight doing it.

    This whole thing is especially relevant for me because I also take a tremendous time to cum. I mean it takes work. I enjoy every second of getting there, don't get me wrong, but it has also led to a little awkwardness in the past where a partner might think there's something wrong with me (maybe tense), or worse, with her.

    It's not that I'm not sensitive in my penis, very far from it. But it takes work to get to orgasm, always has, whether masturbating or during sex. Great for me from a selfish point of view because I can and have literally masturbated and fucked for a couple of hours with the result that I build up incredible orgasms and cum like TNT going off.
    It has also I should say been good for several partners.

    But sex has had to cater for my 'condition'.
    With my penis being large I can't sometimes come before the girl's just worn out, but I've learned that being upfront and just saying, 'this is me, I'll fucking love what you're doing but if I don't cum in fifteen minutes, don't worry about it, I'm still massively turned on by you and loving it" just sets out what's going down and we can both relax and enjoy great sex, as it should be, stimulating the shit out of each other.

    On another note, I remember a lack of communication with an ex almost leading to me getting a serious injury during sex. Its funny looking back.

    She was a young Swedish girl, totally gorgeous, sensual and really hot in bed too. I used to massage her during foreplay which she enjoyed immensely, as I did giving it. To begin with I would only massage her, because I liked to go straight from there into giving her oral.
    But when she offered to do the same for me one time I had no idea that the massage she would give would be so hard that something went in my neck. The feeling I had was like I was caught in a car crusher and being mugged simultaneously but I remember being really surprised and unable to say. 'Jesus fuck!! what are you doing?? I couldn't walk right for a few days afterwards, and after that I made excuses until one day I just said, "look, I can't take whatever that is that you do." Luckily, she was cool about it which was great because I really cared for her. Plus she was so hot in every way I'd have ended up in a wheelchair before I dared blow the sex.:biggrin1:
     
    #16 cason, Sep 23, 2008
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2008
  17. huckjam

    huckjam New Member

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    Some girls are weird though, like this one girl I was fucking once started screaming her head off and pretty much crying and I started to pull out and she yelled "What are you doing? Keep going! HARDER FASTER DEEPER!"

    :biggrin1:

    Guess some girls like some pain/pleasure.
     
  18. TinyPrincess

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    Nope - there's no such thing as "too" big
     
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